MissUnderstood: The ADHD in Women Channel

In the final episode of our “Breaking the Burnout Cycle” three-part series, host Cate Osborn and Dr. Shauna Pollard explore what comes after burnout. They discuss how burnout can affect your relationships, the importance of communicating your needs clearly, and how to reflect on past experiences to avoid repeating patterns. Cate and Dr. Shauna also shares practical tips for tuning in to yourself, setting boundaries, and creating a plan for moving forward with greater awareness, balance, and resilience.For more on this topic: ADHD burnoutADHD and boundaries: Why saying no feels hard (and how to start)Setting boundaries in relationships with ADHDTimestamps: (00:00) Intro (01:44) We have more emotions to regulate while in burnout(05:26) How can burnout impact relationships?(14:32) Setting boundaries(17:52) How can we show up for our partners when we’re burned out?(23:11) Feeling “too much” for needing to have our needs met (24:44) What do we do if we don’t have a support system?(28:01) Outro and creditsFor a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Why do some women with ADHD rush through the courting stage? Dr. Monica Johnson explains what happens in the ADHD brain during courting.From intense texting to early intimacy, the courting stage can look very different for women with ADHD. In this episode, find out what happens in the ADHD brain during courting. Learn how to recognize the difference between real chemistry and manipulation. And get tips on how to manage. For more on this topic: ADHD and dating: Why crushes feel so intenseTips from an ADHD Coach: Is it love or is it dopamine?Sorry, I Missed This: Online dating with ADHDTimestamps:(00:00) Intro(01:07) What is courting?(01:40) The ADHD brain and courting (02:58) How emotional dysregulation impacts relationships(04:42) Why courting can be challenging with ADHD(08:37) How to tell chemistry from manipulation (12:46) Tips for managing the courting stageFor a transcript and more resources, visit MissUnderstood on Understood.org. You can also email us at podcast@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Inattentive ADHD often goes unnoticed. It’s an easier type of ADHD to miss because it’s more internal and less outwardly visible than its hyperactive, impulsive counterpart. But left unaddressed, inattentive ADHD can be just as disruptive.Boys with the inattentive type are especially overlooked — they don’t match the stereotype of what an “ADHD boy” is supposed to look like.So when Brandon Saiz wrote to us about his experience getting diagnosed with ADHD later in life, we knew we had to talk to him. After meeting with Brandon, it was clear his story needed to be shared.Content warning: This episode includes discussion of suicide. Please skip it if that’s not something you’re up for right now.For more on this topic:The 3 types of ADHDListen: The “devastating” findings of a decades-long ADHD studyBrandon Saiz on SubstackDuck, Duck! It's a Goose: Brandon's video gameTimestamps(01:54) Brandon’s background(09:23) How Brandon’s inattentive-type ADHD was overlooked(14:00) On suicidal ideation and inattentive ADHD (19:57) Brandon’s advice to othersFor a transcript and more resources, visit the Hyperfocus page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Burnout isn’t a weakness. It’s a signal that your body needs real rest. Dr. Shauna Pollard is back for the second episode in our “Breaking the Burnout Cycle” series to answer the question: What is rest?  Cate and Dr. Pollard talk about what true, restorative rest looks like (hint: it’s not just zoning out on your phone), and how to start taking small, doable steps toward rest when you’re already deep in burnout.For more on this topic: ADHD burnoutFull Catastrophe Living, by Jon Kabat-ZinnYour Money or Your Life, by Joe Dominguez and Vicki RobinTimestamps: (00:00) Intro(02:08) How do you realize that enough is enough and you need to rest?(03:58) How do we know if the “rest” we’re taking is actually restorative? (09:10) Feeling guilty or uncomfortable with resting(15:18) How to decide what to pursue, and what to wait on(20:14) The relationship between perfectionism, procrastination, and burnout(23:41) Finding small moments to integrate rest, and other suggestions from Dr. Shauna(29:07) Outro and creditsFor a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Have you ever met someone and suddenly you’re imagining your wedding playlist — all before the first date? Dr. Monica Johnson weighs in on the science behind crushes and the ADHD brain.In this episode, you’ll learn:What’s happening in your brain during a crushWhy women with ADHD often fall fast and hard in relationshipsHow to stay grounded in reality without completely shutting downFor more on this topic: ADHD and: Rejection sensitivitySorry, I Missed This: Dating with ADHDTips from an ADHD Coach: Is it love or is it dopamine?Timestamps:(00:00) Intro(00:57) Why do ADHD brains fall in love fast?(07:15) Strategies for remaining balanced while enjoying the butterflies(14:18) CreditsFor a transcript and more resources, visit MissUnderstood on Understood.org. You can also email us at podcast@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Artificial intelligence has cemented itself as the latest world-altering technology. It follows the same lineage as electricity, the television, the internet — the list goes on. Depending on who you talk to, AI is the greatest thing ever or the thing that will destroy the world, with lots of room in the middle for discussion and experimentation. But within the bigger AI fascination, there’s a smaller yet critical conversation about how this technology might help or harm people who learn and think differently. That’s why we brought in Dr. Amy Gaeta for this week’s “Hyperfocus.” She’s an AI ethicist and researcher who also has autism, giving her a unique insight that she shares on our latest episode. For more on this topicAmy’s websiteWhat is assistive technology?6 ways AI can help you manage ADHD symptomsHow software and apps can help with math challengesUnderstood AssistantTimestamps(03:40) AI in the workplace(10:16) Disability justice and technology(13:45) AI’s built-in bias against disability (17:15) How to find helpful, safe AI uses(21:08) Chatbot therapy (25:14) What does the future hold for AI and neurodivergence? For a transcript and more resources, visit the Hyperfocus page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Feeling drained, unmotivated, or stuck in survival mode? In part one of our “Breaking the Burnout Cycle” series, host Cate Osborn and psychologist Dr. Shauna Pollard unpack the question: What is burnout? They explore the signs to watch for, how to recognize when you’re in it, and how it’s different from depression.If you’ve been wondering whether what you’re experiencing is burnout, this episode is a good place to start.Related resourcesADHD burnoutADHD and depressionDr. Shauna’s website, https://drspllc.com/Timestamps(00:00) A word from Cate on burnout(01:50) What is burnout? How is it different than depression?(05:57) What happens when ADHD perfectionism and overcommitting meets burnout?(08:06) How do we know that we’re starting to get burnout? How can we tell if it’s burnout or depression?(12:11) How to recognize whether your battery is low or completely tapped out(15:55) How to get to know ourselves and our bodies better to help us in the future(22:57) Burnout spreading from work into the home(26:39) Outro and creditsFor a transcript and more resources, visit the Sorry, I Missed This show page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Itchy tags, tight clothes, and scratchy fabrics can trigger real ADHD sensory overwhelm. Dr. Monica Johnson explains why it happens and what can help.For many women with ADHD, some clothing isn’t just uncomfortable — it can feel unbearable. This sensory overload can make even getting dressed a challenge. On this episode, you’ll learn:Why sensory overwhelm is more than being “too sensitive”How ADHD and sensory overload intersect, especially for womenThe common clothing triggers that spark discomfort (tags, textures, tight fits, etc.)Practical strategies to make daily routines easierFor more on this topicADHD and emotional dysregulationADHD and sensory overloadADHD, sensory systems, and communicationEvaluating dopamine reward pathway in ADHD: Clinical implicationsAbnormal functional connectivity in children with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorderThe impact of deep pressure stimulation on anxietyThe effects of background white noise on memory performance in inattentive school childrenTimestamps(00:00) Intro(00:58) What is sensory processing(02:14) How to body responds to sensory overload(03:17) What sensory processing challenges can look like (07:04) Why sensory discomfort is different for women(08:32) Tips for managing sensory challengesFor a transcript and more resources, visit the MissUnderstood: ADHD in Women page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at podcasts@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Craig Thomas is best known for his work on TV. He co-created the sitcom “How I Met Your Mother” and has written for “American Dad” and more. He’s penned songs for “Sesame Street” and essays for “The New Yorker.” He’s less known for being a dad. For now, at least. He has a daughter, Celia, and a son, Elliot, who was born with Jacobsen syndrome, a genetic condition causing physical and developmental disabilities. When Elliot was born, Craig’s career was taking off with “How I Met Your Mother.” “I was living an hour drama show at home and then driving to work and doing a sitcom,” Craig says. His upcoming novel, “That’s Not How It Happened,” is based in part on his family’s experience.If you heard our series on the resurgence of the R-word, you’ll recognize Craig’s voice. The conversation with him was so good that we’re sharing more!For more on this topicPreorder Craig’s novelCheck out Craig’s podcastHear Craig on our R-word episodes, part 1 and part 2Timestamps(02:20) Craig’s backstory and current work(09:45) How Craig relates to the disability community(13:10) Disability and media depictions (29:04) Comedy, the R-word, and why language matters(39:10) On parenting a child with disabilitiesFor a transcript and more resources, visit the Hyperfocus page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

It’s a solo mailbag episode! Host Cate Osborn grabs her trusty D20 to let fate decide which listener emails to answer. Cate answers some common ADHD questions from navigating ADHD as a woman, to what it means to have a diagnosis, to how symptoms can shift as we age.Related resourcesUnderstood Explains podcast season 2: ADHD diagnosis in adultsADHD and: AgingFacebook group: ADHD Support for Women by Understood.orgTimestamps(00:00) Intro(00:27) The rules(01:14) Why do previously stimulating activities become routine?(02:48) What does an ADHD diagnosis provide?(05:30) What are some tips for self kindness when dealing with problems we’ve created?(09:56) How to not get too overloaded by a task(14:52) Does ADHD become more calm as you get older? Are there future treatments other than medication being developed?(21:38) A parting word from Cate(23:04) Outro and creditsFor a transcript and more resources, visit the Sorry, I Missed This show page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

For some women with ADHD, people-pleasing is more than just being nice. It’s a way to cope with feeling overwhelmed or misunderstood.In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson breaks down what people-pleasing looks like in women with ADHD. Find out how this coping mechanism can impact your life. And learn helpful strategies to stop people-pleasing and live a healthier life.For more on this topicADHD and: Imposter syndromeTips from an ADHD Coach: People-pleasing everyone but ourselvesADHD and: Setting boundariesTimestamps(00:00) Intro(00:39) What does people-pleasing look like in ADHD?(2:48) Why ADHD leads to people-pleasing(4:31)The hidden costs of people-pleasing (7:10) Tips for managing people-pleasing For a transcript and more resources, visit the MissUnderstood: ADHD in Women page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at podcasts@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if your money problems weren’t just about willpower, but about who you are?In this episode of Sorry, I Missed This, Cate chats with Ellyce Fulmore, financial educator and author of Keeping Finance Personal, about how who you are affects how you deal with money. We cover how things like ADHD, race, gender, and queerness all shape your money habits. Ellyce explains how to understand your own “money story” and why some advice doesn’t work for everyone. We also talk about what happens when someone with ADHD gets into a relationship and has to mix money with a partner.Related resourcesWhat is the ADHD tax?Ellyce’s website, queerdco.comEllyce’s ADHD Aha! podcast episode: The pain of struggling with basic tasks — ADHD in the pandemicTimestamps(00:00) A word from Cate on ADHD and money(02:44) The intersection of identity and finances(07:57) Balancing treating yourself and impulse spending(10:13) The word “should”(14:09) Shame, guilt, and embarrassment about money(17:50) The ADHD tax(20:42) ADHD and finances in a relationship(25:05) Ellyce’s advice for starting to think about your money story(26:58) Outro and creditsFor a transcript and more resources, visit the “Sorry, I Missed This” show page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Many women with ADHD turn to shopping to cope with stress and anxiety. Buying things can feel good in the moment. But it often leads to regret, overspending, and money struggles.In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson explains how too much shopping can become a form of self-sabotage for women with ADHD. She also shares simple tips to help take back control of spending and avoid money problems. For more on this topicADHD and: Impulsive spendingImpulse buying, negative bank balances, and the ADHD tax (Paulette Perhach’s story)Tips from an ADHD Coach: Coping skills with consequencesTimestamps(00:00) Intro(00:50) What is Compulsive Buying Disorder?(03:01) What are signs of shopping addiction?(03:37) Consequences of  shopping addiction (06:56) Tips for managing shopping addictionFor a transcript and more resources, visit the MissUnderstood: ADHD in Women page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at podcasts@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

One of the most inevitable questions that comes with early adulthood is also one of the most fraught: “When are you having kids?” The question is loaded with assumptions and pressure. It also seems to ignore the fact that having kids is supposed to be a choice, not a requirement. For neurodivergent people, especially those with ADHD, deciding whether to become a parent can be even more complex. On this episode of “Hyperfocus with Rae Jacobson,” we talk with author and editorial director Jordan Davidson. She’s interviewed hundreds of people about their decision on whether to become a parent. Related resourcesJordan’s book: “So When Are You Having Kids?”Podcast series: Climbing the WallsTimestamps(03:06) What inspired Jordan’s book(08:35) Jordan’s findings from hundreds of interviews(12:28) How to break schemas attached to parenthood(24:28) The fantasy of the “idealized parent” For a transcript and more resources, visit the Hyperfocus page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

For some women with ADHD, talking about boundaries can feel hard or scary. It’s not just about knowing your limits, but how to say them so others clearly understand.In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson explains why ADHD makes it hard for women to talk about boundaries. Find out how communication styles can help make setting limits easier.For more on this topic:ADHD and setting boundaries Setting boundaries in relationships with ADHDADHD and: OversharingTimestamps: (00:56) Why communicating boundaries is hard(05:55) How to make boundaries easier to set(08:37) Tips for communicating boundaries For a transcript and more resources, visit the MissUnderstood channel page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners! Email us at podcasts@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We’re picking up where we left off last time on Hyperfocus for the conclusion of our two-part series on the R-word’s resurgence. Today, we meet a comedy writer who shares his personal evolution with the word and hear from a disability advocate. We’ll also learn more from our research correspondent, Dr. KJ Wynne, and have producer Cody Nelson back on to hear from host Rae Jacobson about what she’s learned. Related resourcesAndrea Moore ArtsCraig Thomas’ upcoming novelDr. Chris Cipriano’s websiteWe love hearing from our listeners! Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ever wondered if your therapist gets you, or if therapy is even working? You’re not alone. This week, Dr. Elizabeth Kilmer is back to unpack the complicated, sometimes confusing, always human relationship between therapist and client (especially when ADHD is in the mix).Host Cate Osborn and Elizabeth dig into how different types of therapy work, how to tell if therapy is actually helping, and what kinds of conversations are and aren’t fair game in the therapy room. Whether you’re starting therapy for the first time or reevaluating a long-term fit, this conversation will help you trust your instincts and advocate for what you need.Related resourcesDr. Kilmer’s website, elizabethkilmer.comTreatment for mental health issuesDialectical behavior therapy: What you need to knowCognitive behavioral therapy: What is CBT?Timestamps(00:00) Intro(00:43) What inspired this episode(01:53) Relationship between therapist and client basics(04:45) How do we know if a therapist is a good fit for us?(06:50) What is a ‘therapeutic modality’? What is a ‘manualized treatment’?(09:36) How do we know if therapy working?(13:51) How do we give feedback to our therapist?(17:29) How do we breakup with a therapist?(19:35) What do we talk about in therapy?(23:52) What do we do if we don’t have access to therapy?(26:09) Advice on how to start therapy(29:22) Outro and creditsWe love hearing from our listeners! Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Many women with ADHD struggle to manage their emotions. Strong feelings like anger, sadness, and guilt tend to come on fast and feel hard to control. This can make everyday life feel confusing and overwhelming.In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson explains how ADHD makes it harder to manage emotions. Find out why feelings like anger, sadness, and frustration can feel so strong for ADHD women to manage. And learn effective strategies to help you deal with these emotions.Related resourcesTips from an ADHD Coach: Psychological safetyADHD and emotionsMissUnderstood: The ADHD in Women ChannelWe love hearing from our listeners! Email us at podcasts@understood.org Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Last year, Rae and Cody at Team Hyperfocus noticed something unnerving: The R-word was coming back into public discourse. People, especially people in power, seemed to be using it more often, and more freely. We weren’t the only ones who’d spotted this upsetting trend. Researchers, disability advocates, and other journalists were also concerned. If this word, long considered a slur, was being used by some very powerful people, what did that mean for people with disabilities?So we dove in, talking to researchers, members of the community, and even a famous comedy writer. (You’ll see!) And we surfaced with another, deeper question: If the R-word can, and does, cause harm, how do you get people to care? Related resourcesSpread the Word campaignDisability Discourse MattersThe ‘R-Word’ Is Back. How a Slur Became Renormalized (Special Olympics)Rosa’s LawWe love hearing from our listeners! Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Do you have a lot of clutter in your home? Does this clutter prevent you from doing other things, like finding the things you need, or inviting guests over? This week on Tips from an ADHD Coach, Jaye discusses how it’s common for those of us with ADHD to have a lot of clutter in our home — clutter that we have a lot of emotional connection to, and also, a lot of frustration about.This is also the last episode of Tips from an ADHD Coach. Find Jaye on her socials below!Related resourcesJaye’s website, jayelin.comJaye’s instagram, @adhdjayeJaye's other podcast, Now Presenting: ADHDADHD and messinessTimestamps(00:00) Intro(00:52) Carly’s quote(02:35) ADHD and clutter(07:18) What can we do if we want to organize/get rid of our clutter?(12:19) Recap(13:30) CreditsWe love hearing from our listeners! Email us at adhdcoachtips@understood.org Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.