Spilt: A Podcast with Charlene and Tonya

In this episode, we’re getting real about agency — the ability to make our own choices and shape our lives.It’s easy to get caught up in what everyone else wants from us — family, jobs, expectations, or even past trauma. But at the end of the day, we get to decide who we want to be and how we show up.We also talk about the biblical foundation of agency — God gives us free will, not control — and what it means to make decisions that honor both faith and authenticity.This one’s for anyone feeling like life’s been happening to them instead of through them. Always remember, you’re still in the driver’s seat.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

This week, we’re talking about the kind of love that doesn’t always feel gentle — tough love toward ourselves.Sometimes self-care looks like bubble baths and journaling… and sometimes, it looks like being brutally honest about the excuses keeping us buried in the past.During this conversation, we explore what it means to stop waiting for someone else to save us — to pick up the shovel and start digging ourselves out of the dark. Healing requires softness, yes, but it also requires strength.Join us as we talk about the balance between self-grace and self-discipline, the importance of confronting our own patterns, and why growth often begins when comfort ends.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

Escapism can be a helpful way to cope when life feels overwhelming. In this episode, Charlene and Tonya talk about the benefits and comfort that an escape can offer. Taking time to zone out or relax can ease brain and body fatigue, but it’s important to remember that long-term escapism might lead to avoidance or disconnection from your life. Find balance and stay mindful—ask yourself if your break improved your situation or made it worse. Together, the hosts explore the line between healthy escapes and unhealthy avoidance. Life can be harsh, so it’s okay to retreat sometimes, especially if it helps us heal, grow, and dream again.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, Charlene and Tonya revisit the topic of boundaries with a new outlook. Boundaries aren’t barriers that exclude; they’re bridges that foster love, clarity, and respect. By redefining boundaries as a love language, the discussion highlights how setting limits can enhance intimacy, build trust, and bring balance to relationships. Through honesty, humor, and relatable examples, Spilt encourages viewing boundaries not as selfish but as a meaningful act of living with intention.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this creative and eye-opening episode of Spilt, Charlene and Tonya unpack what endless doomscrolling, binge-watching, and overstimulation do to our brains. Using a playful “restaurant menu” metaphor, they introduce the Dopamine Menu—a way to replace cheap, quick dopamine hits with soul-nourishing activities that create lasting joy. From art to hobbies, movement to mindfulness, they explore healthier ways to care for our minds and reclaim balance. This episode is part science, part story, and fully rooted in the Rooted and Real theme of Season 5.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, Charlene and Tonya explore the concept of living a life true to your core values. At the end of our lives, what will truly matter? Will those who love us say we lived in alignment with what we believed was most important? It’s easy to get caught up in distractions, expectations, and the busyness of life, losing sight of our true direction. Once you learn to identify your values, your decisions will start to reflect them more naturally. This is the path to finding genuine peace and living authentically.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this powerful season opener, Charlene and Tonya dig deep into what radical self-love actually looks like—beyond bubble baths and pretty quotes. They explore the internal work of healing old wounds, choosing your own voice, and letting go of shame. And they talk about how self-love shows up externally too: through boundaries, rest, reflection, and honest joy. Rooted in personal stories and spiritual reflection, this episode sets the tone for a season about getting real, staying grounded, and reclaiming your worth from the inside out.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

As Season 4 comes to a close, we’re taking a moment to pause and reflect on the journey we’ve shared—starting with setting mantras and intentions, learning to navigate overreactions, facing setbacks, re-centering our priorities, practicing gratitude, and finally, learning the art of letting go.In this season wrap-up, Charlene and Tonya share honest takeaways, personal growth moments, and the unexpected lessons that came from opening up on the mic. We revisit key conversations, remind ourselves of how far we’ve come, and look ahead to the healing work still to come in future seasons.Join us for this heartfelt reflection—and thank you for growing with us.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this heartfelt episode, Tonya and Charlene explore the powerful—yet often painful—process of letting go. Whether it’s a toxic relationship, old habits, unrealistic expectations, or the weight of past mistakes, holding on too tightly can block our growth and steal our peace.We discuss how to recognize what needs releasing, why it's so hard to let go, and what freedom feels like on the other side. Through honest reflection, real-life stories, and practical tools, we help you take the first step toward emotional unclenching and mental clarity.Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting—it means healing. Tune in and start creating space for the life you truly deserve.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, we explore how the way we set—or neglect—our priorities directly impacts our mental wellness. From overcommitting to people-pleasing, many of us feel overwhelmed because we’re trying to do it all. But what if real peace comes from doing less… with more intention?Charlene and Tonya reflect on how they've struggled with misplaced priorities and the pressure to meet others’ expectations. Together, they unpack how to realign your values, protect your peace, and make space for what truly matters. We also discuss practical strategies for setting boundaries, re-centering your focus, and letting go of the guilt that comes from saying no.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, we explore the dynamics behind overreacting to small triggers, a common struggle for many of us, especially those dealing with mental health challenges. Overreaction often stems from deep-rooted emotions, past experiences, or anxiety, but it doesn't have to control our lives. We dive into the causes of overreaction, discuss how it affects relationships and mental well-being, and share practical strategies to manage emotional responses. Tune in for insights on how to navigate overreactions with self-compassion and emotional awareness.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, we dive into the challenges of managing multiple tasks in today’s tech-driven world. From constant notifications to juggling responsibilities, the pressure to multitask has never been greater—and it’s taking a toll on our mental health. We explore how technology impacts our focus, the link between multitasking and adult ADHD, and share strategies for navigating this modern struggle. Tune in for insights on how to reclaim your attention and find balance in a constantly connected world.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, we explore the crucial difference between setbacks and relapses on the path to mental wellness. Setbacks are temporary obstacles, while relapses can feel like major setbacks in recovery. We discuss how to identify both, manage emotions surrounding them, and provide strategies for bouncing back with resilience. Tune in to learn how to break the cycle of relapse and turn setbacks into opportunities for growth.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, we dive into the profound impact gratitude can have on your mental health. From enhancing emotional resilience to promoting a positive mindset, gratitude isn’t just a feel-good practice—it’s a science-backed tool that can change the way we think, feel, and interact with the world.We explore the neuroscience behind gratitude and how it can rewire our brains for happiness, calm, and peace of mind. We also share practical ways to bring gratitude into your daily life, whether through journaling, mindfulness, or simply shifting your focus to the things you’re thankful for.Gratitude isn’t just about acknowledging the good—it’s a powerful tool for emotional healing. Tune in and learn how to use gratitude to reduce stress, increase joy, and improve your overall mental wellness.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this follow-up episode, Charlene and Tonya dive deep into the results of their self-assessment questionnaires with transparency and honesty. We explore the strengths we’ve acknowledged and the weaknesses we’re working on, while discussing how to set specific, achievable goals that align with our true selves.Charlene opens up about her struggles with indecision and the challenges of trusting herself fully—something many of us can relate to. Together, we talk about how to give ourselves grace during the journey of growth, the importance of celebrating small victories, and how embracing our imperfections can lead to lasting transformation.Tune in for real, raw insights and practical advice on how to keep moving forward, even when the road feels uncertain.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode, we dive into the first part of our self-assessment journey, where we explore the powerful questions that help uncover your strengths, weaknesses, and deeper truths. We go over each question and share our answers, discussing what they reveal about our current mindset, values, and goals. This is just the beginning—while we reflect on the questions and their surface-level answers today, we'll save the deeper evaluations and actionable takeaways for part two, where we’ll take a closer look at how these insights can guide our personal growth and mental wellness.Tune in for a candid discussion and get ready to reflect along with us—your journey of self-discovery is about to begin!Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

In this episode of Spilt, we delve into the complicated relationship between trauma and victimhood. Many individuals who have experienced trauma find themselves unconsciously attaching the “victim” label to their identity, which can hinder their healing process. We’ll explore why this happens, how it affects mental and emotional health, and how people can begin to reclaim their power by shedding the victimhood identity. We’ll discuss the difference between recognizing trauma and holding onto the victim label and offer practical ways to shift the narrative toward healing and empowerment.

In this episode, we’re addressing an important and often overlooked aspect of chronic health issues: the profound impact they can have on mental health. Chronic conditions don’t just affect the body—they can lead to feelings of isolation, frustration, anxiety, and even depression. We’ll explore the emotional toll of living with a long-term illness, how it can affect one’s mental well-being, and the ways to manage both physical and emotional health. Join us as we discuss coping strategies, the connection between mind and body, and how to seek support when dealing with both chronic health issues and mental health challenges.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

Are you surviving or thriving? Many of us go through life feeling like we’re just barely getting by, stuck in a cycle of stress, exhaustion, and endless responsibilities. But what if we could shift out of survival mode and truly start thriving? In this episode, we’ll break down the difference between the two, why so many people get trapped in survival mode, and what practical steps can help you reclaim your energy, joy, and peace.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

Ever felt like your emotions are too big to put into words? Maybe a song, a painting, or a journal entry has spoken for you when you couldn’t. In this episode of Spilt, we explore the healing power of creative expression. Whether it’s painting, music, writing, or even cooking, creativity has the power to process emotions, reduce anxiety, and help us heal. Join us as we break down why creativity is a powerful therapy tool—even if you don’t consider yourself artistic.Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.