Claim OwnershipThe Happiest Lives Podcast
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The Happiest Lives was designed for Christian women who want to stop being disappointed in their relationships and feel more loved and loving. Here you will learn to think better, feel better, and love better.
This podcast is hosted by Jill M. Lillard, MA LPC, a licensed counselor, and Gottman Certified Couples Therapist. Jill has been helping people manage their minds, process their feelings, and have better relationships for over 25 years.
For application exercises and support in applying the concepts learned on the podcasts, you can access growth tools + Live Coaching inside her cost-effective coaching program: Clarity+Courage. Join and cancel anytime.
For more intensive support, check out Jill's signature coaching program, The Happiest Lives Academy, where you receive all you need to make FIVE transformations in FIVE months. Registration opens once a year.
Discover all her programs and courses at www.thehappiestlives.com You can dins links to products at www.myhappyvault.com.
You can email Jill at jill@thehappiestlives.com.
122 Episodes
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This is the eighth episode in our Hormones, Happiness & the Holy Spirit series, where we’re exploring what it really means to live with joy—emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Today we’re talking about desire and drive. God created you with longings—for meaning, connection, and purpose—and the energy to move toward them. But what happens when that drive gets misdirected? When passion turns into pressure or hustle replaces peace? We’ll look at four ways desire and drive can go off tr...
This is the seventh in the series on Hormones, Happiness, and the Holy Spirit. If you’ve been feeling more anxious, irritable, or just not like yourself, it could be connected to perimenopause or menopause. In this episode, Jill talks with Dawn Valentino, a registered nurse and holistic health practitioner, about what’s really going on in your body, how hormone changes impact your mood, and what you can do to find support—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Together they explore t...
Part 6 of the Hormones, Happiness & the Holy Spirit Series “Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” — John 7:38 In this episode, we’re talking about the Holy Spirit, not as a vague presence or a future reward, but as a real, active, present force living in you right now. If you’ve been feeling dry, stuck, or like you’re chasing breakthrough, this is your reminder that the Spirit is already here. Already moving. Already offering ...
This is Episode 5 in the series Hormones, Happiness & The Holy Spirit. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing all the right things—journaling, praying, renewing your mind—and still feel stuck, discouraged, or just plain off, this episode is for you. Today I’m joined by my favorite guest (and husband), Dr. Richard Lillard—a clinical psychologist with decades of experience in both therapy and integrated health. We talk about what’s actually going on when emotional tools aren’t working, the d...
In this fourth episode of our Hormones, Happiness & the Holy Spirit series, we’re talking about the thoughts behind your feelings—because the stories you tell yourself are shaping how you feel, how you act, and how close you feel to God. If your brain is the hardware, your thoughts are the software—and outdated programming rooted in fear, shame, or scarcity can keep you stuck. Today, I’ll walk you through the first step of the Heart Scan process, show you how to separate fact from interpr...
In today’s episode of The Happiest Lives Podcast, we’re continuing our Hormones, Happiness, and the Holy Spirit series with a deep dive into brain health. Jill shares insights from her recent certification as a Brain Health Practitioner with the Amen Clinics and introduces six key brain systems that influence how you think, feel, focus, and function. You’ll learn: Why your brain is like the hardware that runs your entire lifeThe six core brain systems and how they relate to anxiety, depressio...
What if your mood struggles weren’t just in your head—but in your gut, your diet, and even your sun exposure? In today’s episode of The Happiest Lives Podcast, I’m joined by Christian nutritionist Chelsea Blackbird as we continue our Hormones, Happiness, and the Holy Spirit series. We’re diving into the body-lifestyle-mood connection—how things like amino acids, protein, and sunlight directly impact your neurotransmitters, hormones, and overall well-being. You’ll learn: Why your first meal of...
What really makes us happy—and what gets in the way? In this kickoff to a new series, Jill Lillard explores happiness from a whole-person, Spirit-led perspective. Drawing on her experience as a therapist, coach, and ministry leader, she unpacks how our thoughts, hormones, and spiritual life all interact to shape our emotional well-being. You’ll learn: Why happiness isn’t about ease or getting what you wantHow biology and belief both impact your moodWhat the Holy Spirit has to do with joy—even...
Part four of our Loosening Your Grip Series. In this episode, I sit down with my friend Heather Gilion as she shares her family’s journey through her son’s cancer diagnosis and the decision to amputate his leg. This isn’t a teaching. It’s not a step-by-step. It’s a real-life story of loss, faith, and the kind of surrender you don’t plan for—but choose because it’s the only good option. If you’re holding on tight to something right now, afraid of what will happen if you let go, I pray this con...
Part 3 of The Loosening Your Grip Series. If they would just change, everything would be better… right? In this episode, we’re talking about what really happens when we try to manage the people we love—and how to let go without giving up. You’ll learn how to stop living in someone else’s model, how to set boundaries without detaching, and why true peace doesn’t come from controlling others; it comes from staying grounded in your own work. This episode will help you shift from frustratio...
This is part 2 of the Loosening Your Grip Series. You had a vision for how life would go- the timeline, the outcomes, the relationships. But what happens when reality looks nothing like the dream? In this episode, we’re talking about that gap. About what it means to release the picture you were holding and trust that God is still writing a good story. We’ll unpack Jacob’s striving, our tendency to grip tightly, and how letting go isn’t failure, rather faith. If you’ve been white-knuckli...
This begins the new series: Loosening Your Grip. What if the very thing you’re trying to control is what’s actually keeping you stuck? In this episode, I’m sharing a really personal story. Years of chronic pain, self-reliance, and striving brought me face-to-face with a hard truth: I’m not in charge. And that’s a good thing. We’ll talk about why control feels so tempting, what happens when we hit our limit, and how real power begins when we stop white-knuckling life and start clinging to God....
Worry might feel responsible. It might feel productive. But it’s not. It’s just a mental habit—one you’ve rehearsed for years. And today, we’re turning it around. In this final episode of the Habit Turnaround series, we’re breaking down why worry shows up, how it hooks you, and what to do instead. I’ll teach you a simple, powerful tool—The Four P’s: Panic, Pause, Pray, Praise—to interrupt the spiral and access the peace that’s already available to you. If you’re tired of overthinking, bracing...
You’re doing all the things—managing the schedule, watching the budget, keeping the peace, trying to eat clean and “be the good one.” But let’s be honest: it’s exhausting. That tight grip? That anxious push to make it all work? That’s white-knuckling. In today’s episode, we’re breaking down the habit of white-knuckling—what it is, why we do it, and why it’s not actually helping. You’ll learn the real reason your efforts leave you tired, stuck, and secretly resentful… and what to do instead. I...
Procrastination might not seem dramatic—but it’s quietly draining your peace, cluttering your mind, and robbing you of forward momentum. In part six of The Habit Turnaround series, we’re talking about how to stop putting things off and start showing up with purpose. You’ll learn why procrastination isn’t a time issue—it’s a thought pattern—and how to break the habit loop with simple mindset shifts and practical tools. If you’re tired of carrying around that mental to-do list or delaying...
This is Part 5 of The Habit Turnaround series, and today we’re talking about quick thrills—the little dopamine hits we chase to avoid discomfort. Whether it’s snacks, scrolling, shopping, or staying busy, these habits feel good for a moment but keep you stuck long-term. I’ll show you how to break the cycle with the 10 Minute Habit Turnaround so you can stop buffering and start living with intention. Clarity + Courage is my monthly coaching membership for Christian women who want to become the...
Withdrawing might seem like the peaceful, “Christian” alternative to conflict—but it’s not. It’s just another sneaky habit that keeps us stuck. Whether you shut down in conversations, avoid emotions, or silently drift from God, today’s episode will help you see the truth behind the habit of pulling away. In Part 4 of The Habit Turnaround Series, we’ll uncover: • What withdrawing really looks like in your relationships, spiritual life, and self • Why it feels like relief—but leads to isolation...
Arguing feels automatic—but it’s actually a habit. One rooted in fear, frustration, and the need to feel in control. In today’s episode, Part 3 of The Habit Turnaround Series, I’ll show you how to interrupt that habit and build a new pattern rooted in clarity, peace, and connection. You’ll learn: • Why arguments keep repeating • What emotional flooding does to your brain • How to shift from needing to “win” to listening with love • The seven steps to turning an argument into a calm, Christ-ce...
Complaining can feel justified—but is it actually helping? In this episode, we explore how complaining becomes an automatic habit, why it keeps us stuck, and what the Bible teaches about a better way forward. Instead of venting frustration, we’ll look at the biblical practice of lament—how to bring our struggles to God in a way that leads to peace, wisdom, and transformation. If you’re ready to break free from negativity and step into a mindset of trust and empowerment, this episode is for yo...
Most of our habits aren’t intentional—we just fall into them. But what if the habits shaping your life aren’t actually serving you? In this episode, we’re diving into The Habit Turnaround—how to recognize unhelpful patterns, understand why they stick, and intentionally create habits that align with the life God is calling you to. We’ll break down the Habit Loop, uncover the sneaky rewards keeping bad habits in place, and explore what the Bible says about true transformation (Romans 12:2). If ...
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