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The Coaches Way With S & J
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The Coaches Way With S & J

Author: Shahab Nilgiri

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Welcome to my podcast, The Coaches Way With S & J (Shahab/Jon)

I'm an aspiring Life/Personal Development Coach, and this podcast is going to be about becoming the best version of yourself in ALL areas of life, not just 1 area.

Along with myself, Jonathan Thomas does the podcast and gives his insight

We talk about
-Stress management
-Investing within yourself
-Your condition vs your decisions
-Spiritual health
-Mental health
-Getting yourself in the best physical health of your life
-And many more!

My coaching business is MAD...



19 Episodes
NLP is a great way to instill more positive change within your life, in various areas.  One of the ways is the 6 step re-frame.  What I love about this episode, is that it's great for your car ride if you want to listen to something informative, inspirational, and practical. It's just under 20 minutes, and we list out all 6 steps.  1st step starts at 3:12, then we go into detail for everything else A list of the 6 steps.  1. What do you want? 2. What behaviour is getting in the way of what you actually want? 3. What is the positive intention behind that behaviour? (the one that's getting in the way) 4. What are 3 other behaviours that would accomplish that positive intention from the previous question?? 5. Are you willing to take these new actions instead of your previous behaviour routine?  6. Is there any part of you that would object to taking these actions??
Confidence is a big thing, especially in todays crazy world.  So what do you do?? How do you build it? Is there ONE magic thing you can do, and it automatically comes? Not really... But we talk about habits, action steps, state of mind, and al things that have a part to play in you becoming a BETTER you.  Shownotes: :25 - Radio Maria 3:00 - Confidence for men and women 3:20 - MoMonday (motivational mondays) 5:07 - What does confidence mean to you? What it means to me.  6:45 - Jon’s take on confidence 7:25 - My MoMonday talk topic on having fun, despite of fear being present 10:25 - Jon’s NLP talk 11:40 - Small steps, for example - doing video is scary, but it’s a small step in the right direction.  12:50 - Pitfall feeling in stomach 16:00 - The more you do something, the more you realize that the earth is still spinning, there are worst care scenarios. Your confidence is more a state of mind, and everything around you is still going on, it’s still happening.  19:00 - Situations that bring you down. Each different situation requires the same approach mentally, BUT require different action steps. 25:15 - Asking what you think of when you hear the term Alpha Male. Negative connotations.   28:10 Confidence in general, but other areas may be iffy. - Connect with the internal stream, and let out the joy.  32:45 - Liquid Courage 37:30 - Ask yourself are all areas of life where they want them to be. 
Jon & I dive into the concept of male and female energies. We all have the, but we just use them at different times depending on the situation.  There might have been times where you've been more aggressive than your partner, or you've been more calmer. There may have been times where you've had this great vision, and you followed through no matter what.  These are all examples of the different energies at play.  I'll leave them time stamps here.  If you have resonated with some of the things said, then please share this with the people you know :) P.S. There were some technical difficulties, but it was all good! Timestamps!  :53 - What do people think when they hear masculine and feminine energy 3:35 - What’s your balance?? 4:42 - Masculine energy - what is it? 6:15 - Female energy 8 - Back to balance 15 - Mine and Jon’s side 16 - Not a matter of “having” it, but it’s just using it, and when you use it 18 - Self audit 20 - Partners wanting a certain “energy” to come out a bit more 29 - Got both energies, here’s how you know
Jon and I go into SPACE BABY!  True, we don't directly talk about coaching, but it does have it's part to play within the whole space realm, and you'll see that within the podcast.  With TRILLIONS of stars and what not, space is huge, like absolutely huge. it's no wonder that your head might hurt if you start thinking about it too much!  Have a listen, and enjoy getting lost in thought :) ---------------------------------------------------------------------- 2:00 - Space, and the existential properties of it. It’s vastness, and what it means to you.  3:40 - We are small, literally 6:15 - Hubble poignant that telescope 9:00 - Our galaxy alone - 20 billion 11:35 - Picture this in your head 16:00 - Blow someones mind 21: You choose what you believe in 26: Distraction
With so many things pulling us in different directions daily, how do you decide which to give most of your attention to? How do you divide the time and energy?? Jon and I dive into this thought provoking question, and help you on your road to answering it for yourself.  Even thought all of our directions are different, we can still use the magic of finding some sense of balance, some sense of equilibrium. Enjoy! 1:00 - Jamaica / Equilibrium using trips as reset 5:00 - Away from social media 8:30 - Balance, and all it's different aspects 14:00 - The life boundaries - Work/life balance 22:00 - Taking audit of if you're out of equilibrium/ emotions 26:00 - Mini tasks/ Mini audit 32:50 - Blind spots Here is a link to take a equilibrium quiz, courtesy of Tony Robbins. It will give you a score based upon your answers, and you'll find out what areas you might have to pay more/less attention to. Have a listen, like, share, and comment! :) We love the feedback. Jons Website: Shahab's Website:
You can check out Jon's blog post about spiral dynamics here: Basically put, SD is the study of understanding human nature. There are many models, this just happens to be one of them.  There are 7-8 different levels, and each one falls under a category of traits.  I've listed the colours in the timestamps below.  This is interesting, because in your life and the many relationships that play a role, each one of you is a different "colour".  How you interact with one another depends on what your "colour" is.  Have a listen, enjoy, and share with people who you know will get use out of this!   3:00 - Model of how to understand human behaviour 4:40 - Different colours/levels 6:05 - First Level 8:40 - Second level 10:15 - Red 15:50 - Blue 21:20 - Orange 27:30 - Jon makes fun of my for taking 2-3 minute showers 29:35 - Green 33:20 - Yellow
This one's a beauty. Anthony and I dive deep into your thought patterns, how it actually affects your day to day, and what you can do to BREAK the pattern if it doesn't serve you.   At the end of the day, if it doesn't serve us, then why have it as part of our routine?    For example. We briefly mention about looking at your phone the first thing in the morning. What if we were to ask, why?   -We speak about meditations, and how you can apply that in different ways.   -We speak about the importance of starting your day off right. Have a morning routine, and set your physiology up for a winning day.   -We talk about living our your purpose, finding out what drives you.   -We speak about your energy, taking care of your body. Without health, there is nothing   -Having a conversation with your ego. If you sit back and actually have a conversation with it, you'll find out how odd it sounds.   -Many more things!   Have a listen!  Share, comment, and spread the love!   You can check out Anthony's website here:
The new year is upon us, and this is the time where resolutions happen and people tend to either keep them, or fall off. Right off the bat, we know that you don't HAVE to wait until this time to year to come up with resolutions. Btw, I'll put in the timestamps when my loud and hearty laugh happens, just incase you just want to listen to that... Lol We look into different things.... -What makes a good resolution -Why people stick with it, or fall off -How you should go about creating these resolutions -Doing a self audit -The mind, and it's part to play in your world That being said, we know you'll enjoy the podcast and it'll change your perspective on this whole new years resolutions extravaganza. Visit for your free e-book, and blogs about life topics that you may have thought about, or been curious about. :50 - Don’t have to wait until New Years 1:20 - Resolution you can stick with 4:20 - Addressing something in life that I wanna change, how do I go about doing that?? 8:24 - My crazy laugh / audit of your life 11:10 - Make your mind your b**** 12:00 Affirmations / cue cards 16:00 - LOF - Does it work?? (Law of attraction) 20:00 - Going over a resolution / barriers we put up/ self sabotage 30:00- Intentions / trust / weather. Are you going to let it get to you? 32:20 - Eat your feelings / Mindset/ LAUGH!! :) 40:00- There’s no way around it, it’s hard work and dedication. Sometimes it’s not fair - the way things work. 45:00 - When you start to eat right, and have good gut bacteria, your body reacts differently to other foods you haven’t had in a while (pasta, subway, fast food, etc…) Change your normal, to feeling optimal. And this goes for life goals as well. You should feel great about your body, mind, life, soul. 48:10 - Kraft dinner. We all have our moments. Melissa getting cinnamon rolls. 50:00 - Podcast cut off, and we started up again! When we have days where we feel “off”, then that’s okay. No one is going to feel great all the time, but it’s about the overall. Well aligned with what you want. Congruent with your value system. 54: - Doubling financial income People not appreciating where you’ve gone in your life, or where you’re going. 59:50 - Jon totally spacing out towards the end. Listen to this, cuz it’s unexpected, and I laugh like crazy.
This is a great one for in the car on the way to work, an event, anywhere really! If something is giving you anxiety, then this is the podcast for you. Jon and I go into the possible reasons as to -why one may go through anxious periods -your language behind the anxiety -the stories that you are accustomed to, that may cause/lessen anxiety -your words, emotions, and how they tie in together -why being on the "go" isn't always the answer -living within a certain environment If any of these ring some kind of a bell, then you might get some helpful insights from this episode. For more information on topics pertaining to confidence, habits, exercise, and life, visit our websites. Jon: Shahab: Shownotes: 0-3 min - Toastmasters 5:15 - Let the thoughts be. The most you try to fight it, the more power it gets 7:00 - Getting situationally depressed 8:10 - Putting words to emotion, and that becomes how we project ourselves to the world 16:45 - Anxious about everything. What are the options? Write things down, get a therapist (to help with past), get a coach (to help you moving forward), embrace current situation 22:00 - “Have” implying that your anxiety is you, and this is who you are. Which then also implies that you need to get RID of it. You want these emotions to come through when it’s acceptable. What if fear left? We just want to replace them with something better. There’s a time and place for different emotions. 29:00 - Living within an environment that’s not 100% positive. Changing the frame. 34:00 - Stressful situations. The possible solutions 44:20 - People always constantly on the go to almost distract themselves from whatever is going on currently Social media scrolling - Not always the full picture
As mentioned in the beginning, Jon and I speak about vulnerability, although that comes a bit later in the episode since we got side tracked with the isolation tank, the relaxation and what that does to your body, and also how that goes into HOW you think. Then we actually go into being vulnerable, vulnerability in relationships, and how it's NOT a sign of weakness to show it! So... We discuss a few things in this one :) Share and show some love! :)
Here we are again! This time Jon and I are going into change, what drives people to change, and what helps them stick to it. Both of us have had our bouts with change, we will continue to have to face changes in the future. Everyone can listen in and take something out of this podcast! Shownotes: :45 strong stimulus 8:10 - Going through some pain now, so you can reap the benefit of becoming that better version of yourself 10:40- What else will stimulate you for change? 13:00- Self sabotage 14:05- My personal story of change 19:35 - Listening to yourself, you learn more / Jons story 28:00- Actually going through with change 34:00- Leverage mindset 41:00- Is your life, and your wants congruent with each other? 46:00 Inner changes 48:10 Dickens pattern
Jon and I talk about certainty, and uncertainty, and how these needs basically drive EVERYTHING we do in our daily lives. From relationships, to personal choices, the need for certainty is a vast array of things that can bring out both negative, and positive outcomes. Breakdown: :35 - slight annoyance, but not a big deal 1:22 - bigger scale, uncertainty 3:50 uncertainty in relationships - response 5:30 - base amount of control 9:15 uncertainty in your finances 12:10 Cigarettes - another certainty tool 16:30 - Religion for certainty, but the other side of it too 20:39 - External sources for certainty (smoke, drink, etc…) 26:00 - Deep breathing 32:00 - Certainty/Uncertainty in relationships 44:00 - Don’t be that guy who thinks he knows everything Please comment and share if this has given you value :)
Jon and I dive deep into what meditation really is, and why you should implement it into your daily life. It's a great practice, once you get a little comfortable with it. We mention the mental, physical, and physiological benefits of such a simple thing --> Sitting and breathing, who would've thought? Shownotes: 1:45 - Our personal experience with meditation 4:15 - Jon talks about float tanks and his experience in them 8:20 - Alone with your thoughts in your mind in the tank 14:40 my personal meditation routine 15:03 - Talk about using waves 20:30 - Everyone is stressed, why you need to calm your mind 23:50 - Telling people to give it a shot 24:10 - Jon goes about it a different way 25:54: Concentration, clarity, equanimity 29:55: Getting lost in the hustle 38:20 - You gotta empty out your head 45:20 - You HAVE at least 5 minutes 46:00 - Reviewing everything 52:30 - Wim hof method
It's normal to want to be perfect, and get everything right. But is it an advantage to you, or is it becoming detrimental? Jon and I dive into what perfectionism is, our own experiences with it, and how stepping back a bit can help you get to the things you want. Both Jon and I have had that "perfect" image in our minds when it came to our bodies, until we all of a sudden realized, why stress so much about this? Why not just do the best you can, and keep going about it that way? We hope you enjoy listening in, whether it be in the car, or at home while cleaning up the kitchen.
In this episode, Jon and I discuss what NLP is, how it can benefit us coaches to help out our clients (you!), and why something so simple can be so beneficial. We also go over having a type of mindset that helps you do the things that your environment doesn't necessarily see as "safe" (like starting a business) There is also discussion on ways of coaching other than NLP, and the benefits of it, and how even the most successful people in the world have coaches, and for a good reason too. Enjoy!
Jon and I discuss ways parents can implement physical activities into their day during these back to school stressful times. We talk about mindset, keeping it simple, your ultimate reason, and strategies to sneak in activity while your with your kids, or on your own. Don't let your circumstances define how you will live day to day. Hope you enjoy the listen! We go through a recap at the 26:52 minute mark.
In today's society, we are bombarded with outside stimuli all the time. All this effects our internal and external conditions. This knowledge is thanks to my coaching program that I've joined for my personal development - The Healthy Wealthy and Wise coaching program. For more info, visit In this episode, I go over 4 of the questions you need to ask yourself when it comes to making a decision. This goes for any situation. -Who would you like to be? -How would you like to respond? -How would you like to feel? -What would you like to do? I go over how these conditions effect your mind. Leave a comment, a like, or a share if any of the points resonated with you.
This is the 2nd podcast, and it's all about stress management. If your life is filled with some stress (and I think a lot of people can relate of this) then this podcast is for you :)
In this episode, I explain why investing within yourself is one of the best tools you can use for yourself, and for your future.
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