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Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery
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Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

Author: Allen Berger & Thom Rutledge

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Bill Wilson, co-founder of Alcoholic's Anonymous, wrote in 1952, "If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root some unhealthy dependence and its consequent demand." Wilson suggested that if we could identify and continually surrender these unrealistic and unrecognizable demands, that we may then be able to accomplish what he imagined to be recovery's next frontier - something he called emotional sobriety.
 
Flash forward 70 years, and join psychotherapists and best-selling authors Thom Rutledge and Dr. Allen Berger, who have taken up the mantle of exploring Bill Wilson's new frontier. Welcome to Emotional Sobriety.
97 Episodes
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The Decision Maker

The Decision Maker

2023-03-2736:55

Locating our authentic self in the midst of our warring inner committee and standing our ground - not against others but for ourselves - is at the crux of emotional sobriety.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
A we engage with the recovery impetus to be of service to others, In addition to the reward there may also an activation of guilt and other issues tied to our early experiences with our family of origin. Allen shines a light on the importance of integrating taking care of ourselves with taking care of others. These drives are inextricable from each other, and push us towards greater emotional sobriety.   Read Joe’s new blog post Servitude & Stewardship: Emotional Sobriety and the Twelve Traditions: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/blog/blog/7165598/servitude-stewardship-emotional-sobriety-and-the-twelve-traditions   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Recovery (and Emotional Sobriety) are contagious! Joe Chisholm returns to the pod to chat with Thom and Patrick about the benefits we can reap from looking outward, focusing on mutual aid rather than self-help. 12 Step recovery groups are “chaordic,” “communitarian” spaces where we can find the structure we need but also the latitude to be spontaneous. As we step into a more conscious life of recovery, we create positive ripples that affect the lives of others in unexpected ways. In this episode and the next (when Allen returns to the show), we discuss how to make more and greater ripples.    Read Joe’s new blog post Servitude & Stewardship: Emotional Sobriety and the Twelve Traditions: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/blog/blog/7165598/servitude-stewardship-emotional-sobriety-and-the-twelve-traditions   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
As we become more awakened in emotional sobriety, we begin to challenge all our old ideas. The power struggle of emotional dependency and the temptation to frame our experience according to "shoulds," are hurdles to overcome. To cast ourselves in a negative light because we fail, lose, or are disappointed is living a life that’s only partially lived.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Authentic Values

Authentic Values

2023-02-2744:50

How can we learn to live in better alignment with our values? Some of our values are unconscious, and benefit by being brought into the light. We run into problems when we identify more with our false selves than our genuine selves. Where we are with our self-esteem can have a massive influence on how these dynamics play out.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Ripple Effect

Ripple Effect

2023-02-1932:58

Thom and Allen hold down the fort to discuss the role of honesty in therapy. Allen shares the profoundly positive feedback he received from someone who brought Emotional Sobriety to their recovery while in prison.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
It feels good to judge. What does that reveal about ourselves, and how can we work on putting this energy to better use? Exploring how our tendency towards righteous indignation, or “maddiction,” intersects with emotional sobriety.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Radical Honesty

Radical Honesty

2023-02-0544:22

Thom and Allen discuss what it means to be "radically honest." Radical honesty begins with self-honesty. We can’t do it with other people if we don’t first understand ourselves.   Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Thom and Patrick dig into their rocky pre-recovery days, charting the evolution their consciousnesses have taken. While encountering challenges, keep it simple. Each day presents an opportunity to overthink things. Uncoupling from the notion of perfection is key. Emotional Sobriety is something we strive towards, a North Star that we’ll never fully reach. The practice is a constant unfolding, which we hone our entire lives.   Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Allen and Thom welcome longtime contributor to the Emotional Sobriety community Tom Potash to talk about his decades-long recovery journey, the letting go that sports fandom can require, and a more philosophy-based conception of the process of relying less on environmental support and more on self-support.   Please subscribe to Tom Potash’s channel, where his workshops and 12 Step studies can be found: https://www.youtube.com/@12steptom46/ The Emotional Sobriety Study Area details can be found here: https://4dphd.com/emotional-sobriety/   Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Recovery stalwart Richard Warner had to announce himself as a newcomer after decades in the program, a formative experience that he’s grateful for today. With Thom and Allen he walks us through his journey from the depths of addiction to the daily striving for greater Emotional Sobriety.   Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Roger Andes discusses his body-oriented work as a therapist, cultivating connections with others and within himself revolving around the preservation of integrity. Being deeply connected to others while also being connected to ourselves need not be goals that cut against each other. Almost always, there is a path to both.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Longtime collaborator, first-time guest Herb K. joins us to discuss the role of meditation in his daily practice, and how being in alignment with reality is foundational in our evolution towards emotional sobriety. Allen, Thom, and Patrick check in about their greatest lessons and challenges in 2022, looking ahead to the promise of a new year.   Thank you for being with us through these episodes. More will be revealed.   Herb K.’s book, “Practicing the Here and Now”: https://www.amazon.com/Practicing-Here-Now-Intentional-Meditation/dp/1616496746   More on Herb K. at his website: https://herbk.com/    Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519
This week we share our thoughts on receiving & offering guidance to other addicts across a wide span of experience as we navigate the recovery highway. Joe C. from Rebellion Dogs returns to the show to weigh in.    Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
Peg joins us to talk about her more secular conception of a Higher Power, informed by her background in philosophy and the life and work of William James. While working the steps and doing the fearless and thorough moral inventory, she explains how Hume’s list of virtues can come into play. As we redefine our approach to self-esteem in recovery, we can think of it as “knowing how to belong to ourselves.” In this work she strives alongside her students to cultivate an expanded sense of human decency and moral ideals.   More on Peg O’Connor and her book Higher and Friendly Powers: Transforming Addiction and Suffering: https://pegoconnorauthor.com/    Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our prod
Our Inner Civil War

Our Inner Civil War

2022-12-0542:58

If you’re disturbed about something, we encourage investigating what’s beneath that disturbance. This episode we explore the psychological mechanism called projection, and what it can teach us about ourselves as we try to live our lives more meaningfully and effectively.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
With the serenity prayer, we try to figure out the things in our lives that we have the power to change. Here, Thom and Patrick mull the discipline that it takes to be in a practice of emotional sobriety.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.  
In preparation for the forthcoming high calorie sit-downs many of us are having with friends and family this week, Allen and Patrick run down a list of the twelve most common things that mess up the holidays. First we’ll identify the mistakes, then we’ll discuss some strategies of avoiding them. As with so many other issues on the podcast, a lot of this comes down to managing expectations.    Here’s a PDF to download the list in full: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1p953Gq-UApWN08i7mo0Q5zC6everDFKi/view?usp=sharing    Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at
Allen’s big Italian dinners. Thom getting kicked by a horse. Patrick learning what to do with his hands, now that he’s no longer getting loaded. There’s a lot to unpack when it comes to our expectations for ourselves and others surrounding the holidays. Today we discuss how we might be more present for our loved ones in the days ahead, or how to cope when we can’t find that Hallmark enjoyment around the table.   Read Thom's piece "The Rules of Self-Care Apply to the Holidays Too," https://www.thomrutledge.com/_files/ugd/e71801_c8f8b44df1814cddbbe64767c7fe296e.pdf     Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirec
At a certain point (or maybe various points) along the recovery way, we each develop an awareness of what we might call our own inner wisdom, but rather than make proper use of this amazing resource, we have a tendency to continue searching for answers outside of ourselves. Even before recovery, despite passages of stumbling through dysfunctional lives, we gain wisdom. Cultivating discipline is how we can put that wisdom to work for us.   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs    Email Thom: thomrutledgeauthor@gmail.com Email Allen: abphd@msn.com   Allen’s first book, Love Secrets Revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Secrets-Revealed-Intimacy-Connection/dp/0757303978/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=love+secrets+revealed+allen+berger&qid=1650843975&sprefix=love+secrets+reve%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/    Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.  
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