336: Why does your woman poke you sometimes? What’s that about? (ft. Jason Lange)
Description
Ever feel like you're being deliberately provoked by your woman? Or that she sometimes pushes and pushes until she gets a rise out of you -- often about what seem like tiny things?
This pattern can be confusing until you understand the deeper reasons for it. And it's quite a common in dating and relationships, though we don't often discuss it explicitly. Related to polarity, the way Jason puts it is that "the poke is a call for presence and deeper feeling."
It's not always the most mature or conscious way of relating. And the truth is, we as human beings don't always act in the most mature fashion. But if we can grasp the underlying vulnerabilities that drive us, then we often hit on wells of compassion that help us deepen and relax into love in ways we couldn't before.
Remember: Personal growth works. It's not a straight line, but it's always worth it.
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Memorable quotes from this episode:
- "I need to pause you right there."
- "It’s meant to evoke, 'Where are you?’ And ‘I’m having a hard time trusting your right now.'"
- "This ties into a common masculine feeling of, 'I’m not enough.'"
- "Sometimes there’s a sense of, 'Oh, yeah, caught red-handed. I actually wasn’t here.'"
- "Acting out is another kind of poke."