Make it stick:  your message and your presence. How do you do that these days?  I’m not even talking about LinkedIn or other social media. How about when you are actually face to face with another person? With all the competing requirements for their attention-some known and many unknown to you-how do you build a relationship with someone that sticks?

I found some answers to these questions in the third and final conversation from my mini-series discussion  with Nick Sinai and Marina Nitze, authors of the book Hack Your Bureaucracy: Get Things Done No Matter What Your Role on Any Team, a book that I found so poignant and captivating.

Marina, former Chief Technology Officer of the Department of Veterans Affairs, and Nick, a key player in the Obama administration, share their insights into building authentic relationships within large organizations, including the government. They emphasize the importance of understanding people's motivations, fears, and career aspirations (something I call, MFC) to help them achieve their goals. 

Throughout my own career in sales, leadership and coaching the golden rule is to understand the MFC and express a sincere appreciation to each person who chooses to share. Across multiple relationships, this begins to form a web of people who become connected and willing to reach a new goal. Whether inside or outside the company or agency, they become willing to work through disagreements to achieve results and many times to create what often becomes a great new service, product or company. One of my takeaways from the book is that the awareness of MFC and then putting it into action are the foundation for Making It Stick whether practiced individually or by a team. 

We highlight Marina’s incredibly innovative "Grilled Cheese Club” (yes, you can form one too!) approach where individuals from different parts of an organization come together to foster collaboration and understanding, overcoming bureaucratic obstacles in a low-key and informal way. Best to do this in person if possible and don’t forget the cheese! 

The discussion turns to the provocative concept of "stabbing people in the chest,” which in practice is nothing like what it sounds like. It means being open and honest with detractors about disagreements to build trust and transparency so that when it does come time to gain agreement on an initiative or program, you can make it stick. In practice, this means navigating bureaucratic challenges and fostering relationships, even with those with whom we disagree. Think about the last part of that sentence: ‘even with those with whom we disagree’. As I work with coaching clients, customers and partners, I have learned something really inspiring:  the art of disagreeing and then reaching compromise is something many people crave to learn more about and practice in their life and work. 

In addition, our discussion touches upon the value of playing the long game and exploring career opportunities that go beyond just traditional paths, where Nick and Marina stress the importance of earning trust and demonstrating excellence before taking such leaps. In my own career as well as those of clients, this is the number one rule and we pair it up to the practice of, ‘give to get’. 

I hope that you will join the conversation as we wrap up this mini-series and as Marina Nitze and Nick Sinai provide valuable lessons on navigating bureaucracy and driving change, all while leaving a meaningful impact on organizations and society.

Links & Resources:

• Schedule Listening Time with https://www.garydanoff.com/contact

  
  



• Gary Danoff LinkedIn

  
  



• Hack Your Bureaucracy - Website

  
  



• What’s Next Now - “Hack Your Bureaucracy Show #1: Defining and Learning About Your Bureaucracy”

  
  



• What’s Next Now - “Pitching and momentum: learn it, do it, love it!”