Ep. 19 Do You Like Yourself?
Description
Your ideal self, what you believe is the best version of yourself in every area of your life. Your ideal version influences how you think about yourself and your behavior; this is your perfect self. The qualities and values that you value highly and admire in other people. It’s the grand total of your dominant desires and goals. The you that you want to be. The perfect you.
Happy, peaceful, and high achieving people have a very clear ideal self; they’re continually setting high standards, and putting in great effort to achieve and live up to them. When you put the work in, the clearer you are about who you want to become, the more likely you will develop into that person. You’ll rise to the dominant aspiration of yourself.
You become who you want to be.
The flip side of that is unhappy, unfocused, and confused people have an unclear, blurry, distorted ideal self, and in most cases, no ideal self at all. They’ve given little to no thought about the qualities and values of the person they want to be and develop into, and definitely no effort to get there. As a result, their growth and development atrophy over time. Life becomes a grind, and they lose their desire for self-development.
When you define and clarify your values and integrate them into your daily life and decisions, your attitude improves. Because your outer world mirrors your inner world, your life circumstances change to reflect your improved attitude.
SELF-IMAGE
Moving on to your image – the second part of your self-concept. How you see and think about yourself today.
Your self-image or “inner vision” determines how you behave in situations. It’s a reflection of your current dominant qualities and values, meaning you act like the inner vision you hold of yourself consistently.
Kool fact, you can change your behavior by upgrading your inner vision.
This process of self-image modification is one of the fastest and most dependable ways to improve your behavior. When you begin to think and see yourself as more competent and confident, your behavior becomes focused and effective.
Deliberately changing your self-image – the way you live, speak, and behave, creates a different life. Positive change upgrades your life. Negative change diminishes your life. God has set before you life and death, blessing and cursing, and has given you the best answer and the system to live an abundant life. When you change your inner vision, you change your life and who you are.
SELF-ESTEEM
The third part of your self-concept is your esteem. Your self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. The emotional aspect and a foundational quality of achievement and behavior. A key to your effectiveness and happiness. Like a battery, it’s the power source to your behavior – the source of energy, enthusiasm, vitality, and optimism that powers your behavior, that makes you into a high-achieving confident person.
Two factors determine your level of self-esteem:
- How valuable and worthwhile you feel about yourself
- Self-efficacy
How much you like and accept yourself as a good person. The personal assessment, how you rate yourself, no matter what’s going on in your life. The rating isn’t dependent on external factors. Someone with genuine self-esteem can have many challenges and setbacks in their current circumstances and still have a high, optimistic estimate of themselves as a person.
Self-Efficacy
Self-efficacy – how competent you feel you are in whatever you’re doing is the second factor determining your self-esteem level. Self-efficacy is about how you believe you perform. It’s the element that real self-confidence is built on.
Your worth and efficacy reinforce each other. When you feel good about yourself, you behave well, and when you behave well, you feel good about yourself. Both are required. Neither functions well without the other.
How much you like yourself determines your level of self-esteem.
The more you like yourself:
- the better you do the things you put your mind to
- greater self-confidence
- increased positivity
- higher levels of energy
And since how you feel is largely determined by how you talk to yourself, silently or aloud, you can raise your self-esteem at will by saying, over and over, with enthusiasm and conviction, “I like myself!”, “I like myself!”, “I like myself!”
Liking yourself is healthy. It’s crucial for implementing your ideal behavior and having positive relationships. The more you like and respect yourself:
- the better you perform in everything you do
- you’re more relaxed and positive
- you’re confident in your abilities
- you make fewer mistakes
- have more energy and creativity
Liking yourself isn’t the same as being conceited. Here’s why arrogance and self-deprecation are symptoms and manifestations of low self-esteem – not liking yourself. Remember that superiority and inferiority are extreme sides of your self-concept.
Getting honest with who you are and what you believe, and doing the work to change and develop into your ideal self. That’s where your happiness and success lie with your identity, self-concept, self-esteem, and self-confidence.
EXERCISE
Don’t forget to do your work.
Every day look in the mirror and tell yourself, with enthusiasm and conviction, “I like myself!”, “I like myself!”, “I like myself!”
The True Self School
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