Ep. 62 - Breaking the Silence: Healing Porn Addiction, Shame, and Identity Loss in High-Functioning Men with Daniel Rubin, LMHC
Description
In this powerful episode of The Holistic Counselor Podcast, host Diana S. Rice, LMHC, CIMHP, sits down with Daniel Rubin, LMHC, LPC, founder of Transcend Wellness IOP, for an unfiltered and deeply healing conversation about men’s mental health, emotional isolation, porn addiction recovery, and the impact of unresolved trauma.
We explore the hidden struggles of high-performing men who silently carry shame, spiritual confusion, and emotional neglect. This episode is a call to wholeness, vulnerability, and kingdom-centered healing.
Key Topics We Cover:
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The neuroscience of porn addiction and shame
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How early trauma and emotional neglect affect men’s identity
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Why high-functioning men silently suffer—and how to reach them
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The truth about incel culture, influencers like Andrew Tate, and spiritual confusion
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How group therapy and IOPs help men break isolation
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Faith, father wounds, and modeling emotional safety for boys
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Masculinity without emotional suppression
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Accountability, compassion, and discipleship in men’s healing
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The unique power of male-only spaces for recovery
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How retirement and identity loss lead to midlife crisis
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The spiritual root of addiction and how Jesus redefines masculinity
Powerful Quotes from This Episode:
"We have to stop trying to protect our kids from pain and start teaching them what to do with it." – Daniel Rubin
"You don’t have to lose your masculinity to be emotionally mature." – Daniel Rubin
"If you wouldn’t give it to your inner child, why are you still feeding it to yourself?" – Daniel Rubin
"There’s a silent epidemic of men pretending they're okay while dying on the inside. Healing requires truth, tribe, and Jesus." – Diana S. Rice
"Accountability isn’t condemnation—it’s invitation to freedom." – Diana S. Rice
"Men are longing to be seen, but they’ve been taught not to feel. That disconnect is killing them." – Daniel Rubin
Resources Mentioned:
Education + Support:
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Your Brain On Porn – Research on the neuroscience of porn addiction
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NoFap Reddit Community – Peer accountability & support
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XXXChurch – Christian-based porn addiction support for men
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LightPhone – A minimalist phone to reduce screen & dopamine addiction
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Transcend Wellness IOP – Daniel’s IOP program for high-functioning men
Connect with Daniel Rubin:
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Instagram: @transcend_wellness_iop
Connect with Diana S. Rice:
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Therapy: www.throughthevalleytherapy.com
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Coaching: www.transformedmindcc.com
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Podcast IG: @theholisticcounselorpodcast
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YouTube: Watch the show on YouTube