Episode 18: Self-Compassion, Sunglasses, and Why Pants at 8:55 a.m. Still Count
Update: 2025-11-07
Description
Matt, Erin, and guest Becca Lory Hector are here this week — talking about what it means to rebuild your life after a late autism diagnosis, why “shoulds” are poison, and how self-compassion can literally save lives. Becca shares her story of getting identified at 36, how autism gave her the information she needed to stay alive, and what she’s learned about self-defined living along the way.
We cover:
- What happens when you finally get an autism diagnosis after decades of masking and burnout
- The difference between self-esteem and self-compassion — and why the latter matters more
- How internalized ableism and “shoulding” ourselves lead to depression and suicidality
- Redefining success for autistic people: comfort, safety, and authentic connection
- Becca’s book Always Bring Your Sunglasses and why honoring your sensory needs isn’t optional
- Her course Self-Defined Living and how it helps late-identified Autistics rebuild life on their own terms
Also: Mexican Coke supremacy, wearing pants on Zoom, the myth of “high functioning,” and why a good autism eval is as refreshing as an ice-cold Coke.
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