“I was anchored in the epicentre of being wired as the only one to help myself for the majority of my life. But with the sheer weight of what I was prioritising to hide every single day, for years, eventually my severe depression was pushed over the edge, and as a result of my perpetual despondence, the depression also began to develop into other mental health problems. If I was reading what i’m about to write, around 4+ years ago, I know I would’ve subconsciously belittled it because the point is that I still ‘saw a professional’ in the end. There’s a big stigma around seeking professional help within the mental health community, dangerously intertwined with poor experiences and how excruciatingly difficult it is to seek help when there’s waiting lists, costs, bureaucracy, and a blunt lack of care for yourself with depression at least. I was fully immersed in both of those sides. In early 2016, I grasped onto a reduced-fee psychotherapy service (private) following retrospectively one of the most poignant times of my life. It’s taken the most labour to dedicate myself to at least trying to turn my life around all the while breathing felt like lifting a lorry. To sum it all up, i’ve turned it around more than I ever considered literally possible on this earth and in my day/night dreams. The depression i’d say is now mild and still here occasionally but I feel that as natural, and I have an incredible set of life experiences and memories which i’ve made for myself over the years to find purpose in, should I ever struggle - there will always be that streak in me that depends on knowing I can rely on myself at the end of the day, albeit much more healthy and reliable this time. To have become my own inspiration, is incredible. I actually need to remind myself of that.”

 

This episode is special as it is the first time Sophie Wild has openly spoken about her struggles with mental health.