In this episode of Making Sense of Ourselves, Abby and Alfi engage in a deep exploration of the contrasting roles that safety and risk play in personal growth and community development. With their different upbringings and worldviews, Abby and Alfi bring unique perspectives on how these concepts influence our sense of self and our relationships with others.

Topics this episode:

🛡️ Safety vs. Risk: Framing the Discussion Abby and Alfi set the stage by using a metaphor to contrast safety and risk, likening safety to walls built for protection and risk to stepping outside those walls. They explore how these contrasting environments shape personal development.

🏡 Defining Safety Through Upbringing Abby and Alfi share how their upbringings influenced their relationship with safety. Abby, having experienced safety as a scarce resource, values its creation in both personal and community spaces. Alfi, on the other hand, reflects on growing up with a strong sense of safety at home but also dealing with unexpected health issues that challenged his perception of how safe the world truly is.

💬 Exploring Safe Spaces vs. Protected Spaces They delve into the difference between a "safe space" and a "protected space." Abby defines safe spaces as environments where individuals are respected and feel secure to make mistakes. Alfi adds that protected spaces are more rigid, preventing harm but potentially limiting growth.

🐻 Man vs. Bear: A Safety and Risk Thought Experiment In a playful yet insightful exercise, Abby and Alfi revisit a thought experiment about whether one would feel safer encountering an unknown man or an unknown bear in the woods. This discussion highlights the subjective nature of safety and how deeply rooted societal fears influence our sense of danger.

⚖️ The Thin Line Between Safety and Overprotection Abby and Alfi discuss the balance between providing enough safety to foster confidence and growth, and the potential danger of overprotecting individuals, which can stifle personal development and the ability to take necessary risks.

📈 Building Confidence Through Safe Spaces Abby shares how safety has been a key factor in building her confidence over the years, emphasizing the importance of creating environments where individuals feel seen and supported. Alfi counters with a discussion on how confidence can also be built by overcoming risk and emerging stronger on the other side.

🧱 Safety as a Temporary Measure for Growth The episode wraps up with a discussion on how safety should be viewed as a temporary measure to enable individuals to gather the strength to take risks. They discuss how to recognize when safety is holding someone back from growth and how communities can foster both safety and risk-taking.

💬 Final Thoughts: Abby and Alfi challenge listeners to reflect on their own relationship with safety and risk, and to consider how these dynamics play out in their personal growth and in the communities they participate in.