Have you experienced church hurt or spiritual abuse? Do you feel a deep need to examine what you've been taught and rebuild your faith on a solid foundation? Welcome to Fearless Deconstruction, a podcast for those ready to courageously break free from fear-based faith, truly reconstruct their understanding of God, and reclaim their peace.

Host Melodi Kitzmiller understands the journey. She shares her own powerful story of deconstructing spiritual narratives not just once, but twice – in her 20s and again in her 40s. Many shy away from "deconstruction," but Melodi argues it's an essential, even sacred, process, much like remodeling a house: you must tear down what's old to build something stronger, more sound, and more beautiful.

In this podcast, we'll explore:

Why deconstruction is not something to fear, but a vital step towards healing and growth.

How to differentiate God's unchanging love from the pain inflicted by human institutions.

The process of rebuilding a faith that is rooted in truth, not deception or rigid legalism.

Encouragement and practical insights for grieving spiritual wounds and moving forward.

If you're questioning your spiritual environment, seeking healing from past harm, or simply desire a deeper, more authentic connection with God, this is your space. Join Melodi as she guides you through the process of dismantling what no longer serves you and rebuilding a spiritual foundation that will last.

Tune in to Fearless Deconstruction: Reclaiming Your Spiritual Foundation – because true faith is built on truth, not fear.

Find Me: https://melodikitzmiller.com/
Partial Transcript:
I often think about deconstruction. Many people fear it, but to reconstruct anything, we must deconstruct. Like remodeling a house, we must remove the old to build back something better, more sound, and of higher quality. Reflecting on my journey through spiritual hurt and harm, I see myself reconstructing after deconstruction at least twice.

Recently, an experience at church reminded me of who I am now. My childhood was marked by severe trauma and abuse. By 20, I was deeply wounded. My father, a pastor, was my abuser. Church was a constant presence, blending with spiritual abuse. He would verbally abuse me while invoking God, telling me I wasn't measuring up. This led to deep spiritual abuse wounds and possibly drew me to an abusive church environment later, as its rigidity mirrored my rigid home life. This was my 'normal.'

Often, individuals leaving abusive relationships return to similar patterns. When abuse is your 'normal,' it can provide a false sense of comfort. This is why in my 30s, my husband and I returned to a legalistic church; despite its issues, its rigidity felt familiar. Both in my early 20s and my 40s, leaving legalistic church required tearing down old spiritual elements and ideas about God, making space for new, healthier ones—just like remodeling a house.

Paul speaks of 'putting off' and 'putting on' in the epistles. If you don't 'put on' something new, something else will fill the space. The hope is that what you 'put on' is better and of higher quality. Reflecting on my years in my 'legalistic church' or 'bubble world,' I acknowledge both good and harmful elements. While I learned the Bible extensively, I also absorbed skewed interpretations. Nevertheless, those years grounded me deeply in scripture.

I'm always curious why some leave legalism or spiritually abusive environments, with some maintaining their faith and others walking away entirely. My dissertation research focuses on spiritual abuse. One study I read examined older women who healed from such environments, identifying the dispositions that helped them remain connected to God. A key finding was their ability to separate God from the people and spiritual leaders who had harmed them...