DiscoverThe ikario Podcast: human thriving in the modern worldPeople Pleasing Makes You Numb to Anger, Desire & Life
People Pleasing Makes You Numb to Anger, Desire & Life

People Pleasing Makes You Numb to Anger, Desire & Life

Update: 2025-08-06
Share

Description

Are you a people pleaser? A nice guy/gal? It's one of the most quietly destructive behaviors - and it's also surprisingly common. In today's conversation, I'm joined by Oliver Robert Lucas to talk about the causes of and solutions to people pleasing.


Oliver works with men to overcome nice guy tendencies, insecurities and other behaviors that keep them stuck. You can find him here:


  • https://www.youtube.com/@OliverCowlishaw
  • https://www.olivercowlishaw.com/work-with-me/
  • https://www.instagram.com/oliverrobertlucas/


Chapters:

00:00  Intro

01:43  Sacred Combat?

03:21  The Importance of Physical Confidence

10:14  Male Bonding Through Martial Arts

18:00  The Role of Emotional Safety in Men's Work

26:45  Overcoming People Pleasing Tendencies

30:27  The Pain of Self-Abandonment

38:59  Expressing Desire and Facing Rejection

42:40  The Power of Honest Communication


Resources:

  • Learn more about themed journaling and Introspective Writing here: https://youtu.be/XRzGthevzTs
  • Get my Introspective Writing Course: https://shanemelaugh.com/iw/
  • Oliver's video about the friend zone illusion: https://youtu.be/llbB5ayOVsw
Comments 
In Channel
loading
00:00
00:00
x

0.5x

0.8x

1.0x

1.25x

1.5x

2.0x

3.0x

Sleep Timer

Off

End of Episode

5 Minutes

10 Minutes

15 Minutes

30 Minutes

45 Minutes

60 Minutes

120 Minutes

People Pleasing Makes You Numb to Anger, Desire & Life

People Pleasing Makes You Numb to Anger, Desire & Life

Shane Melaugh