Florida police order no selfies with the depressed black bear. Floridaman resists arrest while being arrested for resisting arrest.

Tourist burns feet off in Death Valley. Japan restaurants charge tourists more than locals.

Resurrect dead loved one's with AI avatars. Astronauts will drink their own pee on the moon.

Cocaine Sharks invade Brazil. Father decapitates seagull in front of family.

Plants with offensive names will be renamed. Japan Olympic gymnast sent home for smoking.

Florida stripper sues to remain a stripper. Florida woman bites flight attendant on United Airlines.

This illegal Trader Joe's spice will get you arrested. Melting ice caps are gonna give us a longer weekend.

Young people are getting groped a lot in Japan. World's largest water balloon fight.

Too much cocaine is hurting Columbia. Elon offers his sperm for the first Mars colony.

Taco Bell opens a retirement community. Mexico cancels the Greek God Poseidon.

Two Florida women, one sandwich. Floridaman shoots himself in groin in front of girlfriend while trying to shoot her ex.

Man broke into pet store to release the animals. Man caught smuggling 100 snakes in his pants.

Porn Passports coming this summer. German city renames itself after Taylor Swift.

Offensive Happy Meal will be called just "The Meal". Ammo vending machines in grocery stores.

Teacher livestreams up her skirt during class. Government will ban politicians from lying.

Florida crack bears are fair game. Floridaman on a tricycle fights man with machete over lights.

College has a student height requirement. Rapper's lyrics must be approved by US government.

Man squirts his urine at ladies as an ice breaker. The Big Nude Boat is a nude cruise launching soon.

Government robot worker commits suicide. Minister arrested for performing black magic on a President.

Man flies to Florida to attack gamer with a hammer. Floridaman shoots at Walmart delivery drone.