"Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” *



― Leo Tolstoy

 



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We are in the most interconnected period that humanity has ever experienced.

The potential for us to tap into and amplify collective intelligence is unparalleled.

The potential for us to tap into and amplify collective trauma is also unparalleled.

As we interact with others online and in person, and in all the moments in between, we have a chance to find new ways to react to people and events that help us become more intelligent, regulated and rational.

Being able to regulate ourselves and achieve a desired internal state during times of distress and challenging situations and emotions is one of the most important tools for humans to learn and understand.  It is the journey to maturity and complexity for us as a complex, adaptive organism.



Without an ability to self-regulate, we are more vulnerable to the reactions, insecurities and volatility of those around us.  

As a species, we are still in the early phases of understanding how dysregulation and mental health challenges are passed on and perpetuated from person to person, generation to generation.  This means that in most of the interactions we have with other humans, we will be dealing with some emotional reactivity and immaturity.

Immaturity is a degree of low complexity and is a state of a system (for example a human) that depends on more mature systems to help it meet its needs and achieve its goals.  As a system matures, it becomes more capable of self-organizing and finding new, diversified ways of meeting its needs and achieving its goals.

 

As humans, we do this by mastering our motor control over our bodies, our communication patterns (example language and social signals) and our problem-solving algorithms, which get more and more sophisticated as we have more feedback between us and the world around us.

 

 

The more self-regulating we become, the more we are able to take care of our own needs. 

This doesn’t mean we are isolated beings while we do this.  It means that we are able to meet our basic needs of sustenance, shelter, survival and regulated internal states by collaborating and cooperating with other members to get the tools and resources and support we need to achieve these goals.

Our maturity as a system is reflected in the diversification of our strategies and resources.  This means that we are able to navigate and master our ability to get certain types of support, resources and information from a wide variety of places. This includes our ability to regulate our stress and manage difficult emotions.

 



 

'Immature' systems have lower complexity, and higher rigidity.  

When it comes to regulating our emotional states, immaturity would be reflected in attempting to use the same people and the same kind of activity over and over again to try to regulate our distress, and a lack of other tools to do this.

Increasing our range and repertoire of strategies for survival and flourishing means that we are able to find tools such as online resources, books, therapists, community organizations, and tools and techniques like journaling, meditation, exercise, contemplation, stress inoculation training, physical movement training, etc., to help us achieve a desired internal state.