Two years ago, on 2/2/20, Sylas Lopez both transitioned in and out of this world. It was a devastating loss to his parents who were humbly prepared and excited to welcome his arrival into this world. It was a blessing and honor to cross paths and be hired as Elyse and Rey’s doula for their first born baby. I knew they were special when a I met them and immediately I knew we would become friends. When Elyse was basically full term, to our utter shock, we found out Sylas had passed. At 36 weeks, Elyse gave birth to their baby and said goodbye on the same day. As a witness and support, as their doula, it was a day I will never forget. Two years later we connect to honor Sylas and retell their story. This episode is for anyone really, and especially those who have lost someone dear to them. Although birth is usually awesome, sometimes it’s sad, hard too. That is the nature of things. But it is always powerful. Although it happens in nature, losing a child, even losing a pregnancy, is a devastating loss to many. And although it is uncommon, it’s not as uncommon as one may think. Elyse and Rey are an unbelievable example of love, vulnerability, truth and resilience. They openly share their story and what it is to love and what it is to grieve.  

While this experience for me was truly an initiation as a birth keeper and human being, I decided no introduction was needed from me as I really want this to be Elyse and Rey’s story as parents. But for any and all birth keepers out there, feel free to reach out to me if you are or have attended a birth you feel needs sharing or processing. 

I also just want to throw in there that when we finished the call is was 2:22 Elyse and Reys time and 20:22 my time. That is one of our signs for Sylas. You can’t make this shit up.   

After this life-transforming experience, Elyse became a doula, supporting dozens of families around New York and the Tri-state area. Elyse and Rey welcomed their rainbow daughter, Irisa, into this world last Christmas.   Elyse is an amazing doula, she is always my first reference when people ask me for doula references in NYC and surrounding areas. She is also available to support parents going through loss of a pregnancy or child. To check out her work:  www.irisbirthdoula.com / instagram: @irisbirthdoula