Breaking Free: Courage, Self-Discovery, and Living Your Truth Beyond Societal Norms

Ayce Kyptyn explores the liberating journey from internalised conformity to embodied authenticity, revealing how compassionate self-enquiry and somatic sexology can unlock deeper belonging, pleasure, and courage to be truly seen.

In this compelling episode of The Inclusion Bites Podcast, Joanne Lockwood is joined by Ayce Kyptyn to explore what it means to have the courage to be seen and live authentically. As Joanne unpacks the realities of societal expectations, Ayce shares his personal journey from a life restrained by conformity and religious doctrine to one of acceptance, embodied self-expression, and profound transformation. The duo discuss the powerful intersection of identity, somatic healing, and the necessity of creating safe, non-judgemental spaces for people to express their whole selves. Through honest reflection, they expose the pain experienced by repressing one’s true nature and highlight the liberation that comes from critical self-exploration and breaking through internalised shame.

Ayce Kyptyn is a somatic sexologist based in Boulder, Colorado, with a rich background as a professional theologian and youth pastor within the evangelical Christian church. Following a life-altering period that saw the loss of his career, home and family, Ayce underwent both personal upheaval and awakening. His work now centres on guiding individuals and couples through deep healing, using somatic and erotic blueprint methodologies to help others align with their innate desires and sense of self. Drawing from his own transition and embodied healing journey, Ayce offers unique insight into how reclaiming pleasure and authenticity can lead to meaningful change, both personally and within the wider framework of inclusion.

Together, Joanne and Ayce delve into the complexities of gender, sexuality, and societal conditioning, unpicking the pressures placed upon us to conform to archetypal paths and roles. Their conversation challenges listeners to interrogate whose rules they are living by and invites a reimagining of personal agency, pleasure, and belonging. The discussion also explores practical tools such as the Erotic Blueprint, and the significance of recognising and integrating repressed parts of ourselves—particularly for those navigating transformational journeys related to identity and intimacy.

A key takeaway from this episode is the transformative power of compassionate self-exploration and authentic expression. Listeners are encouraged to question the narratives that govern their lives, seek alignment between mind and body, and foster environments where true inclusion and liberation are possible—not just for themselves, but for every member of society.

 

Published: 19.09.2025

Recorded: 01.04.2025

Duration: 0:52:48

 

• 
  AI Extracts and Interpretations
  


• 
  The Inclusion Bites Podcast - #176 The Courage to Be Seen
  — app.castmagic.io
  


• 
  Other Links
  


• 
  SEE Change Happen: The Inclusive Culture Experts
  — seechangehappen.co.uk
  


• 
  Inclusion Bites Podcast on YouTube
  

Clips and Timestamps

Finding Authenticity After Loss: “And I realised that I wasn’t being authentic to who I am. I was doing what everybody else in this world wanted me to do. And I think a lot of us do that. You know, we go to school, we get a job, because maybe our parents said, hey, this is the path you should take, but it’s not necessarily the path that you wanted to take or I wanted to take in life.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:03:42 → 00:04:01 ]

From Pain to Pleasure: “I’ve been living a lifestyle of pain my entire life, but I would love to transform it into pleasure.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:04:57 → 00:05:03 ]

Viral Topic: The Masks We Wear: “We all are playing a character in this world. We all have this Persona that we’ve created of who we are and that becomes our identity. But is that really your identity and who you really are?”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:07:11 → 00:07:21 ]

Transforming Pain into Pleasure: “Yeah, So I learned how to transmute the pain into pleasure. The first 38 years of my life were incredibly painful because I wasn’t able to be who I authentically am. And as I started awakening that in myself and in my mind and in my body, things started to slowly shift from playing pain into pleasure. And so actually, Jaya’s work in the erotic blueprints is a huge piece of being able to find pleasure in my body and in who I am and how I go about this world. And her methodology or her framework, although it’s meant for a fulfilling sex life, it actually can be used in your entire lifestyle. And so I’ve taken her framework and I’ve. And I’ve transformed my life so that I’m living out of that space.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:15:06 → 00:15:57 ]

Unlocking Hidden Selves: “I don’t necessarily give them the answer, but I give them the safe space to explore what might be arising and then how to get what you want out of that.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:19:54 → 00:20:04 ]

Discovering Your Authentic Blueprint: “What does it actually look like to live your life out of what your primary type is, not what the world says. But, but what are you primarily. How are you primarily wired? And how can you get the most fulfilment and enjoyment?”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:21:52 → 00:22:04 ]

Title: The Power of Allowing Authenticity in Relationships

Quote: “But if we can allow all of someone else to exist without judgement or shame and give them the space to express what that is, it’s a step in the right direction.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:27:51 → 00:28:05 ]

Breaking Stereotypes: “I just want to receive and I don’t want to have to give you anything, no expectations of me doing anything for you.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:37:24 → 00:38:13 ]

Viral Topic: Rethinking Life Milestones: “what would happen in our society if we started asking questions and critically thinking about what do you really want in your life at a younger age? I think we’d have a lot less miserable people, a lot less divorce rates, a lot less hate and, you know, people getting hurt.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:43:19 → 00:43:38 ]

The Power of Community: “It’s almost impossible to do it by yourself. Had I not had a team of people that could resource me and come inside of me and like give me the tools that I needed to actually launch off and do this in a way that wasn’t going to destroy me.”

— Ayce Kyptyn [00:48:58 → 00:49:10 ]

Definition of Terms Used

What is Somatic Sexology?

• Definition: Somatic sexology is an embodied therapeutic practice focused on helping individuals and couples explore their sexuality, identity, and pleasure by bringing awareness to sensations and experiences within the body.


• Relevance: In this episode, Ayce Kyptyn shares how somatic sexology facilitated profound healing and authenticity for himself and those he works with, helping clients move from lives of pain and repression to pleasure and self-acceptance.


• Examples: A somatic sexologist guiding a client to recognise and process bodily sensations related to sexual pleasure or trauma, often using touch, movement, and breathwork.


• Related Terms: Embodiment, Sexual Healing, Bodywork, Sensate Focus


• Common Misconceptions: Many believe somatic sexology is exclusively about sexual acts, but it is primarily about reconnecting people with their own bodies and desires and may or may not include direct sexual contact.

What are Erotic Blueprints?

• Definition: Erotic blueprints are a framework, devised by sexologist Jaya, summarising five distinct ways that people are wired for pleasure—energetic, sensual, sexual, kinky, and shapeshifter—offering insight into individual desires, preferences, and ways of experiencing arousal.


• Relevance: Ayce uses this model to help clients discover and embrace their unique erotic identities, breaking away from societal norms about what sex “should” be and supporting personalised