When It All Falls Down
At the bookstore, picking up my weekly round of books to read, and then something interesting happens. Books for my personal education in my right hand, and books about women and sexuality in my left. And then I ask myself 'Do I really need these?'. I set down the books on women and sexuality, and for the first time in years, I realize that women are no longer my top priority or topic of interest.
In fact, looking at my current newfound lifestyle, women are barely in it at all. The reason why there hasn't been any new stories? On the few occasions that I've been out, I don't recall talking to too many women.
And the two girlfriends situation? It worked itself out. I am now in a monogamous relationship. The second girl really got tired of me blowing her off and treating her like she was second rate. She's an intelligent woman, so I think she kinda figured out what was going on. I believe that the final straw was when she went out of town, and then surprised me by telling me she was coming home a day early because she missed me.
I about freaked out, and she could hear in my tone of voice how I didn't want her to come back early. I didn't treat her right at all. You know it's bad when she says "Go out, talk to girls, but PLEEEEAAASE don't kiss or leave with any." So in short, she knew what I was up to.
I would literally leave her at home to go out with my boys and tell her that she couldn't come with me. It never would have worked out anyway. I just couldn't get over her messy room and horrible eating habits. In a few years, this girl would have been fat once her metabolism slowed down. Other than that, she did everything right. But, I just can't respect a woman that lets me walk all over her, and that's why I treated her like shit.
The other girl, on the other hand, she isn't perfect, but what I like about her, is yes, she has her faults, but she attempts to correct them before I have to say anything. For instance, if she knows I'm coming over, she makes it her priority to clean her house. That, and she's hot as fuck. So women, if you're reading this, your looks DO matter A LOT.
Ultimately, it was her bitchy attitude that won me over. The way I figure it, is if a woman'll let me walk all over her, then if I die, I wouldn't be able to trust her raising children, as she can not stand up for herself.
But in short, everything seems to be falling into place. My interest in the dating community is rapidly fading, being replaced by my newfound love. My views on everything seem to be changing, and not just my views on women: life, money, education, the world, etc.
This blog is nothing more than a part of a much bigger gestalt, and I'm starting to realize it's place. And once I figure something out, I get bored and it's time to move on. Just an interesting self-realization.