When Kids Break Stuff: Teaching Accountability Without Shame or Punishment
Update: 2025-10-19
Description
Your child smashes a TV. Or floods the bathroom. Or writes off the car. What now?
In this episode, Justin and Kylie unpack one of parenting’s trickiest questions: should our kids pay for the damage they cause? You’ll hear real family stories, a breakdown of natural vs logical consequences, and a powerful mindset shift that helps kids take ownership without shame — and keeps relationships intact.
KEY POINTS
- Why “natural consequences” aren’t the same as punishment
- How to teach accountability without blame, guilt, or control
- The “OAR vs BED” principle: helping kids own mistakes and grow from them
- When (and how) to talk about reparations or paying for damages
- How to balance compassion, responsibility, and fairness
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“Discipline isn’t about punishment. It’s about problem solving — together.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
- Happy Families Membership
- 10 Things Every Parent Needs to Know by Dr Justin Coulson
- Entitled [Upcoming Live Webinar]
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
- When something breaks, pause before reacting.
- Ask: “What does my child need right now?” — not “What consequence fits this?”
- Guide your child toward ownership, accountability, and reparation.
- Keep the relationship more important than the thing.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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