DiscoverLeaving CrazyTownWhy You’re Stuck in a Shame Spiral (and How to Get Out)
Why You’re Stuck in a Shame Spiral (and How to Get Out)

Why You’re Stuck in a Shame Spiral (and How to Get Out)

Update: 2025-11-18
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Description

Shame spirals: we all know them, we all hate them, and most of us try to outrun them. In this raw, revealing, and hilariously honest conversation, Finn and Dr. Sarah break down what a shame spiral really is, where these intense emotional reactions come from, and why they often have deep roots in childhood patterns. Using Sarah’s real-life moment of “F-bomb shame” as a jumping-off point, the duo explores how old wounds get activated, why our reactions can feel so outsized, and what it takes to recover with compassion, clarity, and grounded truth.Takeaways

  • Shame spirals often signal past trauma or early developmental wounds.

  • Overreactions usually mean the present moment has touched an old story.

  • Self-compassion is the antidote to shame—not self-punishment.“Pull the lens back”: most shame triggers aren’t life-altering in reality

  • Healing requires understanding, kindness, and choosing not to re-abuse yourself.

  • Key Timestamps

    • [00:00 ] – Welcome back: what shame spirals feel like
    • [01:00 ] – Recognizing hidden vs. overt shame

    • [02:00 ] – The “speaking regret” shame spiral

    • [03:00 ] – Sarah’s F-bomb video story & activation

    • [06:00 ] – Childhood memories that amplify present shame

    • [10:00 ] – Tools: pulling back the lens, practicing self-compassion

    • [12:00 ] – Finn’s shame around talking too much in groups

    • [15:00 ] – Trauma origins of shame patterns

    • [18:00 ] – Healing, compassion, and the parent-you-needed approach

    Notable Resources & Guest Links

    • Dr. Sarah Michaud, PsyD — Author of Co Crazy
  • Subscribe, rate, and review Codependency Recovery: Leaving CrazyTown.Share this episode with someone who spirals into shame and needs real-talk tools to get out.

    Codependency Recovery: Leaving CrazyTown is a raw, real-talk podcast hosted by Finn and Dr. Sarah Michaud. With humor, honesty, and a healthy dose of clinical insight, they tackle the chaos of dysfunctional relationships and offer real tools for healing. Subscribe wherever you listen and follow @LeavingCrazyTown on social media for more real-talk recovery content.


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    Why You’re Stuck in a Shame Spiral (and How to Get Out)

    Why You’re Stuck in a Shame Spiral (and How to Get Out)

    Dr. Sarah Michaud and Finn Allen