The Feels with Charmian

*This episode is a follow-up to EP 36. This was a year in the making! At the start of the season, I decided that we’ll all pick a theme for ourselves to live by in 2023. We’d let it guide us from the back of our minds and see how that intention would manifest for us. Now, 10 episodes later, I’m finally revealing my 2023 theme to you all and sharing the highs and lows that came with it. This episode is paired with the upcoming one, where I’ll be featuring some of your themes and stories over the year. Keep your emails coming, I’ve been loving reading them all! In case you missed it, you can send in yours via the details below. Stay tuned for EP 47 for your story shout-out!  --- EMAIL ME YOUR THEMES! In your emails, please indicate in the subject: "For The Feels: My 2023 Theme" Some guided questions to help you get your juices flowing ☺ 1. The theme — What led you to this theme and why did you pick it? What were your interpretations of the word, and were there specific experiences you intended to experience? 2. The changes — How did you see yourself change according to the theme you set? e.g. habits, attitude, mindset, perspectives. Was there anything that surprised you? 3. The stories — Share with me 1-3 of your favourite / most memorable experiences that happened this year, as a result of you setting that theme! *Please indicate if you would like to keep your entry anonymous, and if so, please mention your alias so I can credit you in the episode! EP 47 drops 23rd December.

The council has spoken; we're having a meeting with all of our toxic traits ☺ I'm not a fan of the woe-is-me mindset, and this is definitely not a hall pass for us to indulge in victim mentality. However, it is healthy to acknowledge what we got going on that is causing undesirable patterns in our lives, so that we may fire them accordingly. In this episode, I share a few of my own patterns with you, to create a safe space for you to go within too. These include: 1) Calling it quits early 2) Never fully appreciating the present 3) Strengthening the pillars of self-love (self-trust, self-belief, self-compassion) As you do this, please remember that in spite of what you acknowledge require looking into, you never need to be perfect before you can be lovable. If you need additional support, you may wish to share your discoveries with a trusted therapist. --- EMAIL ME YOUR THEMES! In your emails, please indicate in the subject: "For The Feels: My 2023 Theme" Some guided questions to help you get your juices flowing ☺ 1. The theme — What led you to this theme and why did you pick it? What were your interpretations of the word, and were there specific experiences you intended to experience? 2. The changes — How did you see yourself change according to the theme you set? e.g. habits, attitude, mindset, perspectives. Was there anything that surprised you? 3. The stories — Share with me 1-3 of your favourite / most memorable experiences that happened this year, as a result of you setting that theme! *Please indicate if you would like to keep your entry anonymous, and if so, please mention your alias so I can credit you in the episode! The episode will be released 2 weeks from today. I look forward to hearing from you fam x

We all know what it's like to experience moments where we entertain the idea of giving up. It's taking too long, it's not going anywhere. We've all been there. If you're on the brink of that, perhaps this episode will help reignite the flame in you to keep going. Especially if giving up is not your first choice. While my journey to becoming senior instructor at Absolute is not for everyone, my aim of sharing the highs and lows of this with you is to remind you to "make it to the click" no matter how winding the road may seem. Whether it's in the form of a random shower thought, an awakening after a night's sleep, or in my case, a deliberate change of mind - it will click for you. If it hasn't, maybe it's not time to give up just yet. New episode drops every Saturday!

Your entire personality is made up. The identity you put on the most becomes who you are. Whether that scares or comforts you, in this episode I discuss how that's possible through repeated storytelling. You are not a product of your circumstances, since those circumstances are actually taking cues from your state of mind, i.e. who you are being most of the time. The state you occupy the most, produces these outcomes that reaffirm what you first repeatedly entertained internally. So if we want our circumstances to change, we must first change within. Saddle up people, this is a big one x

We're baaaack. Turning 30 this year has been liberating, and in the time away I found the words to describe my takeaways from being 20-something. I share my discovery about self-worth, recognising that there's more to life than being attractive to the people you like, to stop asking for permission, and how being triggered is a choice. Side note; I hope you've been keeping tabs on your 2023 themes ;) I look forward to hearing your stories, the surprises and changes as a result of the theme you chose at the start of the year. Next episode drops a week from today.

Letting go is not something you do, it's something you stop doing. In this episode, we'll be discovering: 1. What letting go is and isn't 2. Why letting go seems hard (but doesn't have to be) 3. The Sedona Method, and how I apply it 4. The Charmian Method, and how you can apply it! Letting go doesn't have to be dark, tedious or dramatic. It doesn't have to take long. It can even be fun, if you allow yourself to make it so. I understand what it's like to struggle with this topic, and I hope that this will help free you in the process of letting go. There are tons of techniques out there regarding this topic, but these are the ones I personally use and count on. You deserve to feel free of the things you no longer want to include in your life, and I hope this helps. <3 This is a bonus episode. Stay tuned for Part 2 of Season 3 coming soon!

It is the nature of nature to forgive. Too often, when we think about "forgiving", we think it means to take action towards something or someone. But really, forgiveness is not about doing something, it is the absence of it. I'm here to tell you that no one other than you has the ability to convince you to un-feel resentment, disappointment or anger with regards to the matter at hand. You forgive when you are ready to. What we can do with the un-forgiveness, in the meantime, is learn about it, understand it, because we stop fearing something once we befriend it. We are then open to the possibility of forgiveness. I hope this episode comforts you when you need it, reminding you that this too, is all part of the human experience. Remember, you can forgive. Books I referenced: The Little Book of Forgiveness Power of Your Subconscious Mind This is the end of Season 3, Part 1. Thank you for the love, and stay tuned for Part 2. <3

Google “Top SG male influencer”, and the first name that ranks that list is Benjamin Kheng. Even if you don’t know what this multi-talented artist does exactly, you probably know him through social media, recognised for his sincere humour and never-ending pursuit for artistic expression. Ben is arguably one of the most creative people I know, and it was nice to kick back with him and chat about everything and nothing. I pick Ben’s brain on his views about the phenomena of social media influencing, reflect on our career passions and mental health, dish on when authenticity becomes oversharing, and navigating our personal lives in the public eye. This is inherently a conversation between two friends, so expect random musings and non-sensical laughter! Follow Ben here: @benjaminkheng The full episode list for Part 1 of Season 3 can be found @charmiantyx on Instagram. Hit the bell icon to be notified when the next episode drops!

Hailed as “Asia’s Anna Wintour” and “Top 100 Women of the Future”, Singaporean Dr Loretta Chen is an award-winning creative director, bestselling author and respected professor. She was shortlisted as a Nominated Member of Parliament and was International Consultant to the investment arm of the Royal Government of Bhutan. Above all, she is a loving daughter, sister, wife, aunt, and mother to 18 fur babies. Her latest book, M/OTHER, is a collection of the most heart-wrenching, yet hopeful stories of mothers and their children from different walks of life. In alignment with Mothers' Day, Loretta and I discuss the varying modalities of being a mother, the stories that forever changed her, post-natal depression, and why support for diverse parenting is crucial. The book gives us an insight into the realities of unconventional parenting, while I ask Loretta about her relationship with motherhood, her own mother, and her take on romantic partnership and marriage in this day and age. This episode isn't just dedicated to someone who resonates with the role of a mother in any capacity, but is important for anyone who understands the profound responsibility that comes with loving, against all odds. Get the book: https://www.stbooks.sg/products/m-other Connect with Loretta: @drlorettachen on Instagram The full episode list for Part 1 of Season 3 can be found @charmiantyx on Instagram. Hit the bell icon to be notified when the next episode drops!

.. is not real. Fear is an emotion exclusive for the "future", that doesn't currently exist. It traps you in its own reality, and the only way it becomes your reality, is if you make it real. Read that again. In this episode, we discuss the illusion of fear, why we manifest unwanted/ fearful outcomes more "easily", and how to allow the presence of fear, without letting it run our lives. There is no need to fear fear. There is no need to fight it. It was never real to begin with. The full episode list for Part 1 of Season 3 can be found @charmiantyx on Instagram. Hit the bell icon to be notified when the next episode drops!

Welcome back to Season 3 of The Feels, people! We kick off Part 1 by setting a theme for ourselves. If you've tried and tested this year's resolutions to no avail, let's try setting a theme instead. We discuss why themes give us direction without rigidity, and how to decide on the right theme for you. To keep each other motivated and accountable, we'll set our own themes, and check back in with each other in the final episode of the year. More details on this as the year unfolds! The full episode list for Part 1 of Season 3 can be found @charmiantyx on Instagram. Hit the bell icon to be notified when the next episode drops!

Hey Alexa, play Sam Smith's 'Money On My Mind'. This is a fun one to end the year! To help you with your goal-setting for 2023, I thought I'd share with you how I manifested my money goals this year, from the moment I intended it, to how it unfolded, to what I've learnt in the process. No, this is not another cup method to manifest a couple hundred dollars, this is not where you find the secret to win the lottery, but a real look at what's been stopping you from actually having more, and how to actually have more. As always, this is a tried-and-true experiment that I hope will encourage you, and remind you of what you're capable of. Thank you for another amazing year on The Feels! The Feels has been ranked amongst the Top 10% most shared podcasts globally in 2022, and this is the best surprise I'm receiving this holiday season. You are truly the reason I can continue using my voice for a greater purpose, and for that I cannot thank you enough. I love you all!

Nothing in life has meaning. You make it mean something, so the question is, what does it mean to you? Human beings are inherently storytellers. We are designed to create meaning, in order to make sense of our time here. Otherwise, there truly is no point to doing anything in life (ha). In this episode, we discuss the paradox of assigning meaning, why we choose to legitimatise some meanings and not others, and how to not live a life of delusion. The meaning of life isn't to be found, it is to be created. Make it mean what you want it to mean. @charmiantyx

Some feelings feel particularly heavy, and no one likes that. Having been on both ends of the coping spectrum, i.e. letting negativity overstay its welcome, versus not acknowledging its presence at all -- I share why it is necessary to find a balance between the two. You're already feeling the ick whether or not you want to, and choosing not to feel it now, is simply postponing it. Letting it through is the fastest, cleanest way for it to leave.

Why do we get some things that we want, and for others, they seem to elude us? In this episode, we discuss the tendency as human beings, to see our biggest desires, as big to begin with. In order to have the things we want, we have to become the version of us that naturally identifies with having it. We talk about how to shift into that mindset, and how to take our goals, people, and ideal states off the pedestal we built for them, in order to really experience them. @charmiantyx An optional, cute way to support the podcast if you found this episode helpful to you! Thank you :) ☕ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/charmian ☕

Let's talk affirmations! We affirm every moment of every day, so the question is, how do we affirm more of what we do want? A scan of what we experience now will give us a clue of what our subconscious programming is currently like. I discuss the Illusory Truth Effect and why you don't have to believe what you affirm, how to craft the right affirmations, when best to affirm intentionally.. and everything in between. This is a tried-and-true daily routine I use to stay in the best possible mindset. Write it, become it. x (Psst. This episode goes hand-in-hand with episode 28.) @charmiantyx Give us a rating if you love the podcast 🌟 An optional, cute way to support the podcast if you found this episode helpful to you! Thank you :) ☕ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/charmian ☕ Listen to my other podcast: SGExplained. New episodes out every fortnight on Sundays.

Some of us consider spiritual upgrades as becoming closer to God, but I see it as becoming closer to oneself. In the last year, I've learnt about what it means to change no one but self, reframed my perspective on the role of desire, and how I've arrived at trusting that what we want, we can have. Spoiler alert; it involves giving no one but yourself, the permission to believe that you can. Thank you for coming along on the ride, see you on the flip side of 29! x @charmiantyx  If you enjoy the feels, please give us a rating! An optional, cute way to support the podcast if you found this episode helpful to you! Thank you :) ☕ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/charmian ☕ Listen to my other podcast: SGExplained New episodes out every fortnight on Sundays!

It takes 21 days to form a habit, and 90 days to create a lifestyle. In 2022, I finally have a mental health routine that I feel confident about sharing with you :) From my exact journaling format, to how I build a meditation routine I love, how I keep a mental diet, and how I start my mornings - I hope this episode motivates you to create a wellness routine that not only feels natural to you but one that you love. Feel free to skip ahead to specific sections with time codes, and all resources I referenced can be found below as well. I love you all and am always assuming the best for you. <3 3:22 — How I meditate. 14:40 — How I journal. 27:10 — How I set mental boundaries. 33:00 — How I start my mornings. 37:30 — Announcement! My go-to guided meditations: ediyasmr’s channel https://youtu.be/TS8WieldiW4 aaron abkes’ channel Create Yourself https://youtu.be/1CtSsjHmQ34 I AM https://youtu.be/J76yeF2ttd8 Daily Intention https://youtu.be/GRk3OB-dpTY New episodes of SGExplained out every fortnight on Sundays: https://open.spotify.com/show/4f3ErNGtWmtoG6Ht8jvZzE?si=40f821a0d7324261 @charmiantyx An optional, cute way to support the podcast if you found this episode helpful to you! Thank you :) ☕ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/charmian ☕

How often do we discuss our successes? How often do we talk about our failures? We get so comfortable replaying our failures in our head, one would think we enjoy failing ;) In this episode, I share how I rebel against unhealthy inner conversations when we miss the mark, and how to have a healthy relationship with failure. Get comfortable with failing, until it gets bored of you. Then, success!!  Connect with me @charmiantyx / charmiantan.com An optional, cute way to support the podcast if you found this episode helpful to you! Thank you :) ☕ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/charmian ☕

Let's talk about MOOLAH! Or more specifically, how to make your money work for you, no matter how or what you earn. In this episode, I invite my friend Matthew John (@slim.matt) to reinforce the basics of money 101, and together, we break down the various money personality types there are out there. This is especially helpful if you work in a gig-economy, just entered the workforce, or are looking for ways to save comfortably, consistently. Thank you to The Hive Lavender for sponsoring today's episode! Visit https://thehivestudios.com.sg/ for 20% off their photography studios and 10% off their podcast studio for the month of January. Work with me @charmiantyx / charmiantan.com An optional, cute way to support the podcast if you found this episode helpful to you! Thank you :) ☕ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/charmian ☕