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The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast - hosted by Danielle Black, Australia's leading specialist in child-focused post-separation parenting.
This isn't your typical separation, divorce or co-parenting podcast. We tackle the hard truths about what happens when separation involves family violence, high-conflict dynamics, and ongoing abuse - and most importantly, how to protect your children when the flawed Australian 'system' lets you down.
Each episode challenges the dangerous myths that keep women and children in harmful situations. From exposing why Australia's love affair with 50/50 parenting arrangements is hurting Australian kids, to revealing how post-separation abuse operates through parenting arrangements - this is where protective parents get the evidence-based guidance they desperately need.
Putting children first after separation - even when that means challenging professionals, fighting inappropriate arrangements, and refusing to accept "compromise" solutions that damage your children's development and wellbeing.
Raw, unfiltered, and research-backed. Because your children's wellbeing matters more than adult concepts of "fairness."
Transform from confused to confident in your post-separation parenting decisions. Join The Post-Separation Parenting Blueprint waitlist for exclusive early access, early bird pricing, and instant free mini-guide and private podcast episode. Join the waitlist today
Ready to make child-focused decisions with confidence?
Visit danielleblackcoaching.com.au to learn more about how we can help.
66 Episodes
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The Post-Separation Parenting Blueprint™ is launching after months of development, offering a comprehensive system that transforms protective parents from conflict-avoidant to strategic advocates for their children's needs. • Knowledge component includes evidence-based child development, safety assessment, and age-appropriate arrangements • Capacity building focuses on nervous system regulation, emotion regulation, and maintaining healthy boundaries • Advocacy element provides strategic co...
Evidence-based approaches that prioritise child safety after separation exist, yet our current family law system in Australia continues to fail children by putting parental contact above protection. When we strip away ideology and look at what research actually shows, we discover that protecting kids from harmful patterns while maintaining safe connection is what truly serves their best interests. • Safety must be the starting point, with every case beginning with the question: "Is this chil...
The 2006 amendments to Australia's Family Law Act were hailed as progressive reforms designed to promote children's relationships with both parents after separation. But what if these changes actually made children less safe? What if the evidence shows children were better protected before this ideological shift? In this eye-opening episode, we expose how well-intentioned policy created a 20-year disaster for the protection of children in Australia's family law system. Before 2006, the typic...
What happens when the very experts meant to protect our children can't identify the abuse that's harming them? Australian research from the University of Queensland delivers a shocking revelation: children exposed to coercive control have more than double the odds of developing PTSD compared to their peers. The trauma isn't theoretical - it manifests as anxiety, depression, self-harm, suicidality, and substance abuse disorders that can shadow them throughout their lives. Yet eve...
Navigating life after separation requires more than just knowing what your children need - it demands the capacity to advocate for them even when it's deeply uncomfortable. In this groundbreaking episode, I reveal my proprietary framework that's transformed hundreds of parents from conflict avoidant to genuinely protective. The Three Steps to Protective Parenting® framework addresses the missing link in most post-separation advice. While professionals typically focus on providing information...
Even when parenting arrangements seem impossible to change, we can strengthen our children's attachment security through consistent, attuned care during the time we do have with them. The remarkable plasticity of children's brains means attachment repair can happen at any stage when they experience responsive caregiving. • Quality of interaction matters far more than quantity of time when building secure attachment • Children's brains remain capable of healing and forming new patterns throu...
Attachment theory is a crucial but often misunderstood concept that significantly impacts children's wellbeing after parents separate. Understanding attachment isn't about controlling access to your child, but rather protecting their fundamental developmental needs when deciding upon post-separation parenting arrangements. • Attachment is a biological survival system ensuring children stay close to caregivers who keep them safe and help regulate emotions • Children form a hierarchy of attac...
What if the arrangement everyone claims is "best for children" after separation is actually harming them? This provocative question forms the foundation of our deep dive into the dangerous myth of 50-50 equal shared parenting time. Drawing on Australian government-commissioned research and international studies, we expose how equal shared care arrangements can negatively impact children's emotional regulation and attachment security - particularly for young children under four years of age.&...
In this episode, I pull back the curtain on my personal journey through coercive control and post-separation abuse in this raw, vulnerable episode. I share how I met my former partner at just 17, failing to recognise the red flags of control because they mirrored dynamics that I witnessed in childhood. When I finally left the relationship when my son was 12 months old, what I thought would end the abuse actually marked the beginning of a new, equally devastating phase. I recount how fear par...
Ever had that gut feeling that the "professional advice" about your parenting arrangements just didn't fit your child's needs? You're not alone, and you're probably not wrong. The heartbreaking reality is that many professionals working in the separation space - lawyers, mediators, coaches, even family therapists - are operating on dangerous myths rather than developmental science. They push arrangements that sound "fair" to adults while ignoring what children actually need to thrive. Take ...
Welcome back to a transformative episode after a year-long hiatus! While I've been away from the microphone, I've been deeply immersed in the trenches with my one-on-one clients, gaining invaluable insights that I'm finally ready to share with you all. Today's episode tackles a confronting question that sits at the heart of post-separation parenting: Are you a protective parent or are you striving to avoid conflict? The uncomfortable truth is that you cannot be both simultaneously. This isn'...
Ever wondered how to regain control when communicating with a controlling ex-partner? Join me, Australian Separation and Divorce Coach Danielle Black, as we discuss the insidious tactics like DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) used by these controlling personalities, and learn how their lack of empathy and pathological lying can make them seem more strategic and intelligent than they really are. Protecting your mental and emotional well-being is crucial, especially if yo...
Join me, Australian coach Danielle Black, as I discuss how my specialised coaching approach prioritises the well-being of both you and your children, equipping you with the tools to set firm boundaries and effectively engage with the legal system after separation. I delve into the unique benefits of one-on-one coaching, supplemented by the camaraderie of group membership, and discuss how weekly group video calls and an online platform can create essential human connections, provi...
Can you truly distinguish personality disorders from PTSD and CPTSD, or are the lines more blurred than we think? Join me, Danielle Black, as I unravel the complexities of these conditions, shedding light on how traits like mood swings, depression, and emotional dysregulation overlap in CPTSD and BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder). I discuss the critical role of accurate diagnosis and effective therapies, such as EMDR, in helping individuals process trauma and reduce emotional triggers. Mi...
What happens when we hastily label our abusive ex-partners as narcissists? Join me, specialist Australian Separation & Divorce Coach Danielle Black, as I explore the critical differences between narcissistic traits and true personality disorders in abusive relationships. We'll uncover the fact that most abusive male behaviours stem from perceived male entitlement rather than clinical disorders, and how this understanding can change the way you navigate your own experiences. B...
This episode of the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast, hosted by Danielle Black, promises to tackle the disturbing realities of abusive and neglectful parenting. Learn how controlling and abusive parents manipulate their children through tactics like 'infantilisation' and 'parentification'. Discover the emotional toll these harmful behaviours take on the children, making them bear the weight of adult responsibilities and catering to a parent's emotional needs. Uncover the red flags, such as threa...
Can cultural and spiritual beliefs be weaponised against you, even after a relationship ends? On this episode of the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast with Danielle Black, discover how abusers manipulate cultural and religious values to maintain control and inflict pain post-separation. Learn how these manipulative tactics can manifest, from undermining your religious beliefs to preventing your children from embracing their heritage. Join Danielle as she sheds light on the additional betrayal fa...
Ever felt trapped in your own life due to someone else's control over your finances? Discover the insidious world of economic and financial abuse as we unveil tactics that can keep you chained to a controlling partner long after separation. This week, I open up about my own struggle with grief after losing a family member and the importance of taking time to care for ourselves, especially when life gets overwhelming. With heartfelt thanks to my supportive clients, I return to the ...
Have you ever felt like your role as a parent is constantly being sabotaged by your ex? The struggle is real! Controlling and abusive former partners can use both overt and covert strategies to undermine your parenting—like the "Disneyland dad" phenomenon and turning special occasions into battlegrounds. In listening to his episode you'll learn how to spot these patterns. Remember, knowledge is power—understanding your ex's motives and manoeuvers is the first step towards mainta...
Welcome. I'm Danielle Black, and today we're exploring the manipulative tactics used by controlling abusers who weaponise children in their ongoing power struggles. We'll uncover how these abusers, masking their self-interest as parental concern, often disregard their children’s emotional well-being and developmental needs. With heartfelt gratitude, I'm also sharing a glimpse into my world as we transition to weekly episodes. Your unwavering support has allowed me to...
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