Many of our problems are the result of a failure to realize that we are not children anymore. Many of us fail to understand the power that we gain as adults, or at least are unable or unwilling to exercise this power.

There is no such thing as personality. There are just patterns of thinking that we learnt as children. But when we become adults, we gain the power to choose different patterns, if we want to. Just as when we are adults, we can choose our hobbies or careers based on what suits us, rather than on what suited our parents, so too can we choose our personalities.

If we don’t, our happiness will be completely dependent on external circumstances and we will be setting ourselves up for an unhappy life, because a good proportion of the time bad stuff will be happening to us.

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