Let’s face it…

Shit happens.

And it happens to everyone, probably hundreds or even thousands of times throughout their short time on this earth.

And when something seemingly ‘catastrophic’ happens, like losing your job, or not being accepted on an interview for a dream career or an academic course or whatever, it’s easy to feel disheartened, to feel like life is unfair and that ultimately it’s YOUR fault because you’re a ‘failure’.

The trouble with the way our society works is that it’s members are actively encouraged not to fail. Failing is seen as ‘bad’, and that it should therefore be avoided at all costs.

We become so conditioned against failure even whilst still at school that we go from eager, excitable toddlers who will answer questions before they are even asked, to shy, self-conscious teen-agers who won’t even put their hands up to answer a question for fear of getting it wrong and then being judged by our peers. We even sit at the back of the room so we don’t draw attention to ourselves.

But the truth is failure is necessary. Without it we cannot learn. And it should therefore be embraced. And moreover, typically after failing things WILL turn out better for you that if you hadn’t failed.

Failing makes you stronger, more skilful and resilient.

Think about the way the body heals itself. If you break your arm for instances, the bones grows back stronger in that area than it was before.

Life events work in the same way. I’m not disputing that right now, you may be going through something that feels horrible and that you wouldn’t wish upon your worst enemy, but I can guarantee much of the time failures in life or unpleasant life events can actually turn out to be blessings in disguise.

Failures can also be opportunities to adapt, improvise and overcome as they say in the military.

So like a good friend of my Caroline Brown recommends, it’s important to ‘Embrace Failure.’