RESOURCES

Quick Start Guide: www.leslievernick.com/start 

Pattern Questions to Ask:

1. When was the first time ...


2. When was the last time... 


3. What is a typical time?


4. What's the worst time?

Summary: In this episode, Julie Sedenko and relationship expert Leslie Vernick discuss how to recognize and address destructive relationships. Leslie highlights five key signs of a destructive relationship and offers advice on navigating these challenging situations.

1. 
   

   Identifying Red Flags in Marriage

   
   
   • Explanation of common red flags that may indicate a relationship is becoming destructive.
   
   
   
   


2. 
   

   Recognizing Patterns of Destructive Behavior

   
   
   • Importance of identifying repeat patterns in behavior that are harmful.
   
   
   • Differentiation between occasional mistakes and ongoing destructive patterns.
   
   
   
   


3. 
   

   Sign One: Feeling Controlled

   
   
   • Indicators of control and manipulation in a relationship.
   
   
   • Psychological and emotional impact of being controlled.
   
   
   
   


4. 
   

   Sign Two: Feeling Afraid

   
   
   • Understanding fear in non-physically abusive relationships.
   
   
   • Common fears and their effects on the dynamics of a relationship.
   
   
   
   


5. 
   

   Sign Three: Feeling Confused

   
   
   • The role of gaslighting in causing confusion.
   
   
   • Strategies for regaining clarity and validating one’s own reality.
   
   
   
   


6. 
   

   Sign Four: Feeling Objectified

   
   
   • Recognizing when one is being treated as an object rather than a partner.
   
   
   • The emotional toll of objectification.
   
   
   
   


7. 
   

   Sign Five: Deception

   
   
   • Impact of chronic deception on trust and safety in a relationship.
   
   
   • Recognizing the signs of deceit and its consequences.
   
   
   
   


8. 
   

   Navigating Deceptive and Manipulative Behavior

   
   
   • Dealing with duplicity and manipulation in relationships.
   
   
   • Strategies for protecting oneself and maintaining sanity.
   
   
   
   


9. 
   

   Taking Control of Your Happiness

   
   
   • Personal anecdotes and empowerment stories.
   
   
   • Importance of self-celebration and taking charge of one’s own well-being.
   
   
   
   


10. 
    

    Recognizing Destructive Patterns and Seeking Safety

    
    
    • Identifying patterns and understanding their frequency and intensity.
    
    
    • Assessing personal boundaries and safety measures.