Dating and rarely finding that elusive spark? This episode is for you!

We begin by exploring the mystifying concept of a "spark." What does it mean to feel a "spark," Dear Listener, and is it a prerequisite in the early stages of dating?

Next, we discuss whether it’s okay not to feel an instant connection and whether attraction and a spark are synonymous. Is it possible to be attracted to someone yet not feel that instantaneous spark?

As we venture further, we dive deep into all the reasons you might wonder, "Why am I not feeling a spark with anyone?" From the Sex & the City Fallacy to asexuality, avoidant attachment, and unrealistic standards, we touch on seven common spark stoppers.

You’ll walk away with compassionate pointers about navigating times when the spark seems to be missing more often than not.

Key Takeaways

00:00 - Intro

01:29 - What is a spark?

10:31 - 1. The “Sex and the City” fallacy

18:19 - 2. Asexuality

23:32 - 3. Dating Anxiety

29:30 - 4. Unrealistic standards

35:51 - 5. Avoidant attachment

42:10 - 6. An ineffective dating strategy

50:31 - 7. The context is a turn-off

Resources and links

For full show notes with links, visit relationshipcenter.com/podcast

The Asexuality Visibility and Education Network

Exposure Therapy: An Evidence-Based Treatment For Social Anxiety And Dating Anxiety

Ep. 2 - What to Look for in a Long-Term Partner

What to Look for in Partner free guide

Diane Poole Heller’s attachment styles assessment

Ep. 9 - Surprising Truths about Attachment Styles

Ep. 10 - How to develop secure attachment

Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski

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