Elevator pitch: I'd like to take a 19th century French melodrama and update it, eliminating the graphic violence and changing the famously heartbreaking ending. Also, we should set it in a small town full of horny old ladies.

Studio Executive: Ok, here's a ton of money.

Only one person can land that pitch: Total Dad favorite and comic dilettante Steve Martin.

Fred Schepisi directs Martin, Daryl Hannah, Shelley Winters, Fred Willard, and a right jolly cast of gentle weirdos through this Dad-candy (for whom among us Dads doesn't wish to change some unsightly physical feature ("Dad Bod" acceptance be damned)? 

Don't look right at it: it's 1987's ROXANNE.