Relational Experts Geoff and Poppy Spencer
Update: 2018-09-05
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The Zen Leader welcomed Geoff and Poppy Spencer from Relational Experts about their own love journey and their new radio program on WSRQ called The Relationship Restaurant. In the last segment of the show I discuss a concept called Projection- which is the subject of my new blog post. Intro:Welcome to The Zen Leaderwith Laura Jaye. Whether you're a leader at home or in the boardroom, Lara provides the tools to help you get unstuck in different areas of your life. Now here's your host, Lara Jaye. Lara Jaye:Good morning, I'm Lara Jaye and thank you for joining me here on The Zen Leader.I'm so excited for this show today. My guests are Poppy and Geoff Spencer. They are certified coaches, relationship coaches. I want to call you love coaches. Could I call you love coaches? Geoff Spencer:Sure. Poppy Spencer:Sure can. Lara:Welcome to The Zen Leader. How are you guys doing today? Poppy:Thank you. Geoff:We are great. We're great. We like this love thing already. Lara:You like it? Geoff:We're excited about that. Lara:I like it. I like it. Relationship and love. This is a tough topic for some people. I'm sure we're going to… Geoff:And they often don't go together, relationships and love, unfortunately. Lara:[LAUGHTER] They don't. They don't. We've got lots to talk about. But the main reason you guys are here is you have a new show here on WSRQ that's getting ready to start. Poppy, can you tell me a little bit about the show first? Poppy:We are so excited to join the WSRQ family and we rolled out this program that we trademarked because of our own lack of communication many, many years ago — I'll let Geoff fill in on that background — and we thought, "Isn't it kind of like when we introduce couples to hard topics that they need to talk about?" So, we made it like a restaurant menu to go through those things, like courses of those challenging topics that crop up in all relationships, whether it's personal or in the workplace. Lara:So what would be an example? Geoff:The salad course, the greens is money. Lara:Ooh, the salad. Ooh. Geoff:One of the really tough topics to talk about, money. Lara:It is. Money, money, money. Geoff:Mm-hmm. Lara:That's a tough one for couples, too. Geoff:We even have a thing we start with, which is a lot of fun… because before you really can get to the hard topics, you have to talk about some of the little, little things that can get in the way. We have a whine list spelled w-h-i-n-e. The whine list. Lara:[LAUGHTER] I like the whine list. Geoff:These are all these little things that often can pile up and get in the way of being able to talk openly about more challenging topics, so things that the couples have to make sure that they talk about and get out in the open, the little things that have crept up and often started little and build and build, and build, and if they aren't addressed, they can become so much more. Lara:They can. They can. Money was a big one for my ex-husband and I. Geoff:Sure. Lara:I say ex-husband — we were married 25 years — but he would say the only reason we stayed married was because we had the same house, but we had separate checking and savings. I'm sure that you hear that a lot with different… to say, "Okay, what's going to work for different couples?" because it's different for everyone. Definitely. Geoff:It is. Lara:So, tell me. The Relationship Restaurant,when does the show start and air here? Poppy:It starts next Thursday, April 13th at 5 o'clock Eastern Standard Time for one hour. It'll be a live show, for the most part, and we welcome call-ins, and we might touch on a topic that might gain some commentary, and we can have a live coaching if somebody wants to call in, too. Geoff:It might even be like remember the old Frasier Crane show? Lara:Yes. Geoff:On the Frasier Show he goes, "I'm Frasier and I'm listening." Lara:I'm listening. I'm here. Geoff:I'm here. Lara:So, you're ready. I like the idea of The Relationship Restaurant. So, we've got salad. We've got whine. What else do you need besides salad and whine, right? Geoff:All the different things are involved. There's little things like the amuse bouche, the little things you start off at a nice restaurant where they give you just a little sample of something. We often talk about this in a relationship as something that you can just start with that it's a nice gesture. It's a nice thing in a conversation to start off with. You don't want to often just go right to meaty topics, the main courses. You want to often have something that's a little nicer to talk about. Lara:Absolutely. So what got you interested in relationships and love? I can't wait to hear this story. Poppy:Okay, so the backstory is Geoff and I were college sweethearts, and we were 21 years old — and we're much older now — and madly in love, and the only problem that we had was I was ready to graduate and he had one more year of school. Right before graduation, I broke us up, not because anything was wrong, but… Geoff:It's because I was a schmuck. [LAUGHTER] Poppy:Piggybacking on last week's… Geoff:Last week's show. Lara:On last week's show, I like that. I love it. Poppy:So, we realized — fast-forward 32 years — we didn't have the communication skills and the maturity to learn how to speak to one another about those "what happens next" and "what's going to happen to us?" Geoff:We actually figured out it came down to two words. Two words were the difference of what my lightning-quick mind might have figured out being the guy, 21-year-old schmuck that you are at that age. But Poppy asked me, "What's going to happen next year?" I simply went to… my mind said, "Well, I'll be back
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