Writer Emily Maguire on losing her own faith, but finding awe and inspiration in a controversial myth about a female pontiff who some people believe sat disguised on the papal throne for two years in the ninth century.

Writer Emily Maguire grew up in a very Christian home, where life revolved around the Church and prayer.

By the time she was in her late teens, Emily had well and truly rebelled against her religious upbringing, eventually dropping out of high school, getting a job at McDonalds and getting married.

But it wasn't until she suffered a rare stroke in her 20s, that Emily truly lost her faith.

She remained fascinated by the history and the stories of the Church, however, and has written several books inspired by that interest.

Most recently, Emily was gripped by a tale that has haunted the Catholic Church for more than 1,000 years—rumours of a woman who disguised herself as a man, entered a Benedictine Monastery and rose up the ranks until she was elected the most holy ruler of all, the Pope.

If she truly did exist, after two years on the papal throne, Pope Joan was found out in the most dramatic way possible.

This episode of Conversations discusses Catholicism, Jesus, religion, faith, writing, books, atheism, Christianity, finding God, losing faith, agnostics, spirituality, Christian history, power, politics, Roman Empire, Constantine, Charlemagne, marriage, childless by choice, Pope Joan, female pope, female Bishop, female leadership, teenage girls, teen sexuality, rebellion, crisis of faith.