Read the full episode here https://journeyfrommeh.com/the-tipping-point-between-fear-and-bravery/

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Some years ago my husband and I went on a great summer holiday. 

We stayed in the honeymoon suite in a lodge high on the dunes. We started our days with long walks on the beach. The rest of the day was spent rotating from the main pool at the beach bar, to the lodge pool and, finally, the splash pool on our deck. Delicious meals, ice-cold cocktails, oily massages on the sun deck and long afternoon naps were the tracks that our days ran on.

At the end of the day, four course dinners under a visible milky way were followed by a wine-wobble walk back to our suite.

We spent our trip back home debating where this holiday stood in the rankings of our top holidays. This holiday felt like “needs met”. Total body and mind relaxation and spirit restored.

Days after we returned home we no longer felt relaxed and restored. This didn’t feel like the usual “coming down from a holiday high”. This felt more like realising we were the proverbial frog in the now boiling water.

We had been wrestling for some time with our dissatisfaction with our lives but kept diminishing our feelings by telling ourselves things like: everybody feels this. It’s part of being an adult. We’re just feeling burnout or we’re probably having a midlife crisis. Or we need to do more of this or if we just added that to our lives we’ll feel better.

This holiday was supposed to be part of our solution but it just highlighted how we could feel but weren't feeling. 

We had our own business, which we’d started from scratch, and our days were focussed on our clients and 15 staff. We were often working 16 hour days so the only time we had to express our feelings to one another was during our early morning walks with our dogs.

One of our other favourite things to tell ourselves was that we should be grateful for the lives we were living. Many others would appreciate what we had. But no matter what we told ourselves we just felt worse.

During our sunrise walks with our dogs we started to fantasize about running away from what we had created and starting over. One of my husband’s favourite fantasies was to buy a plot of rural land and build a log cabin. At six foot six and built like a rugby player all he needed was the plaid shirt, an axe and a saw and he was ready for his new lumberjack life.

We started to fantasize about running away

I was concerned about what we’d do once the cabin was built.