DiscoverIn Sight - Exposing Narcissism
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In Sight - Exposing Narcissism
Author: Katie McKenna & Helen Villiers
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© 2023
Description
Katie and Helen answer your questions about narcissism, parentification and emotional abuse. Empowering growth through psychoeducation, breaking the cycle one podcast at a time.
140 Episodes
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Burnout - it's a phrase that so many of us have heard, but what does it mean, especially for those with a history of trauma? Listen as Dr. Claire Plumbly explains why burnout can be so difficult to recognise, and why it's something that everyone should be aware of. You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) • Do you hate saying no? • Do you avoid conflict at all costs? • Do you never feel good enough? • Do you feel like a burden? • Do you find it hard to ask for help… • …but do everything for everyone else? • Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries? If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
Our listener this week shares how she felt manipulated and silenced by her adoptive mother, describing how even her father's death was weaponised against her. Now she's no contact and struggling to speak up in her current relationships, she asks how she can begin to repair the lingering wounds of her childhood. You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) • Do you hate saying no? • Do you avoid conflict at all costs? • Do you never feel good enough? • Do you feel like a burden? • Do you find it hard to ask for help… • …but do everything for everyone else? • Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries? If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
As a psychotherapist and counselling psychologist within the NHS, our guest Dr. Natalie Cawley is no stranger to both sides of the therapy chair. Listen as she shares an invaluable look into how her own past has shaped her practice, and the lessons she's learned from 'failed' relationships and working with vulnerable and inspiring people. TW: self-harm, suicide Find out more about Dr. Natalie and 'Just About Coping' at https://www.nataliecawley.com/ and on Instagram at @nataliecawleypsych You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) • Do you hate saying no? • Do you avoid conflict at all costs? • Do you never feel good enough? • Do you feel like a burden? • Do you find it hard to ask for help… • …but do everything for everyone else? • Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries? If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
Going no contact with a narcissist is never a decision that's made lightly. Our listener describes being called stubborn, selfish and difficult and takes full responsibility for the breakdown of the relationship with her parents. Listen as Helen challenges the narrative of blame and shame that's surrounded her since childhood. You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) • Do you hate saying no? • Do you avoid conflict at all costs? • Do you never feel good enough? • Do you feel like a burden? • Do you find it hard to ask for help… • …but do everything for everyone else? • Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries? If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) Former "good kid" turned trauma therapist, Maggie Nick joins us this week to talk about trauma and the impact her own childhood has on her parenting, including how she was feeling triggered by her children in ways she never expected. Listen as Helen and Katie unpick the relational trauma and shame that needed to be shed before Maggie could silence her inner critic and become the parent she wished she had. • Do you hate saying no? • Do you avoid conflict at all costs? • Do you never feel good enough? • Do you feel like a burden? • Do you find it hard to ask for help… • …but do everything for everyone else? • Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries? If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. Coming soon - join the waitlist here. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) Confused by the family dynamics growing up and the blurred lines between parent and child, our guest this week describes a deep need to understand her past before she can fully move forward. She questions whether she was the golden child or the scapegoat within the family that should have protected her all along. Despite going no contact, she shares her fear of an unexpected run-in or being pushed to reconnect by family members minimising the abuse she experienced. Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 65 episodes today on our Patreon page including how to identify if you were the scapegoat, golden child or invisible child in your own family. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) When you've spent your life feeling like you're an 'empath' who's an expert at spotting a lie, what do you do when you can no longer trust your instincts? And is it instinct, or is it trauma? That's the dilemma our guest is facing this week, as she asks how she can trust the opinions and actions of others, when she can no longer trust her own. Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) We're honoured to have been joined by Matilda live this week, who's asking for help with understanding the dynamic of her relationship, and asks how she can avoid the internal despair she feels at the first sign of conflict. Listen to Helen and Katie share their thoughts on respectful disagreement, unpicking conflict and power dynamics, and the importance of repairing the relationship afterwards. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) Our community is front and centre this week, as we answer YOUR questions! From diagnosing a narcissist to how best to support a sibling, we've loved this opportunity to help our lovely Patrons with the questions that are most important to them. Thank you to everyone that asked a question, we wish we could have covered them all! Fancy asking your own question or even a chance to guest-star on the podcast to read your letter? Look out for more info on your exclusive subscriber-only feed over on our Patreon page. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) We're delighted to be joined by ADHD expert and host of the 'I Have ADHD' podcast Kristen Carder this week as she returns to share her personal story of surviving emotional abuse. We talk about how it feels to be forced into a box that simply doesn't fit, and the key takeaways from thousands of hours of therapy that have helped her reconnect with herself and help thousands of clients. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) Whether it's because you're no longer fuelling their ego or you're standing up to their manipulative behaviour, being discarded by a narcissist is one of the most devastating things to experience. Originally released exclusively for our Patreon subscribers, we're sharing the 'Discard' episode of The Freudian Slip to everyone this week. Enjoyed this episode and want to hear more about the cycle of abuse, family roles, healing strategies and so much more? Unlock instant access to over 60 more in-depth episodes just like this one over on our Patreon page. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) Calling all people pleasers, this one's for you! This week we're replaying one of our community's favourite episodes, originally released back in January 2023. If this episode is a refresher for you, we'd like to ask you to reflect on what's changed for you over the past 18 months as you listen - we hope this is a valuable exercise for you, and enjoy the episode. Original: The listener this week is struggling to know whether to stay in her relationship. Feeling unseen and unheard but so in love with her partner, she can't make sense of what's acceptable or not. Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) TW: mention of childhood illness Stuck in a cycle of breaking up and making up, our listener this week reflects that her upbringing may have led to her missing some red flags in her relationship. But as her patience wears thin and she finally breaks away, the situation is complicated by sharing a workplace. Fearful of what he may be saying about her to their colleagues, she asks if it's possible to stay professional and protect herself at the same time. Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. Find What My Bones Know here (aff link) and the recommended exercise on the trauma bond here. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) TW: mentions of physical abuse, disordered eating and cancer With a family unit split down the middle, our listener this week questions why she was punished simply for not being the same as her sister. Each parent picked their favourite daughter and pitted them against each other, in a competition that was rigged from the start. After adding physical distance and being left all but emotionally abandoned, she asks if her family should have done more to repair their relationship, or is she expecting too much? Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) TW: physical abuse, abortion, assault, stalking From reading childhood diaries to mocking her physical appearance, this week's listener was shamed and belittled by her family at every opportunity. Even after reaching milestones her parents never thought her capable of, she's still grappling with the feeling that despite her own beautiful family, she will never be able to let go of the deep sadness that's still holding her back. Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) TW: Sexual abuse, self-harm This week we hear how our listener is coming to the realisation that she may have been subjected to covert sexual abuse at the hands of her parents. Despite being expected to run the household as a teenager as well as keep her younger sister safe, she's now struggling to connect with her own feelings. Was it really abuse, or is she just being sensitive? Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. Domestic violence article referenced: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/experts-reveal-how-spot-emotional-33201421 We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) A move back to the family farm soon becomes a nightmare for this week's listener. She describes her demanding mother in law causing a scene at birthday parties, arriving unannounced in a fit of anger and refusing to listen to reason. Despite her husband reaching the end of his tether and cutting ties, our listener asks why she's the one wanting to fix things for the sake of her children. Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) TW: Violence To those on the outside, our listener's mother has always been the generous, kind and loving parent that's been unfairly denied access to her precious grandchildren. But dig deeper and there's a lifetime of shaming, gaslighting and even excusing physical abuse. Our listener has been given expensive gifts, huge public displays and fancy holidays, but what's the true cost to her and her family? Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) Family law solicitor Tracey Moloney AKA The Legal Queen joins us on the podcast again this week, this time we're talking about children and grandparents. Do "grandparents' rights" exist? And how can a child be protected from manipulation at the hands of a bitter ex-partner? Find The Legal Queen on TikTok. Note: Tracey specialises in English and Welsh law only, and this episode does not constitute legal advice. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links) From spotting insidious emotional abuse in the courtroom to surviving divorce proceedings against a narcissist, we're hearing practical guidance and legal insights from family law solicitor Tracey Moloney AKA The Legal Queen! This week we're focusing on how to protect yourself during divorce and separation, but fear not - Tracey returns next week to chat about the rights around children and grandparents. Find The Legal Queen on TikTok. Note: Tracey specialises in English and Welsh law only, and this episode does not constitute legal advice. We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology. In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here! Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.
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I grew up hearing "I love you but I don't like you very much". I was today years old when I understood how abusive this was.
In relation to over eating, I picked this up from UK adoption trauma therapist Paul Sunderland: "It is common for children in trauma to soothe themselves by over eating. Eating and chewing sends a message to the limbic brain that we can't be under attack, because we're having a meal. Which sends a message to the reptilian brain that we can put our weapons down, because we're eating."
I love how angry you both get on behalf of the victims. It's very soothing.