Intuitive Style

This week, Lee Alisha of Wearing on My Mind joins to share about her experience returning to self-confidence after loss and the role of bright color in showing her transformation! We also celebrate Lee’s recent completion of an MFA, discuss why writing on Substack is a breath of fresh, and how she decides what to buy and wear.Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeYou’re listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I’m Maureen McLennon Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully.Maureen: Today’s guest bounded onto my Substack feed with joy, enthusiasm, and bright color. While she might be slightly newer to our Substack feeds, she’s been making style and beauty content on Instagram for a minute, which is equally as delightful as her writing style. Lee, welcome to the show.Lee: Thank you so much. Thank you for that introduction. It’s so sweet.Maureen: I love seeing a new creator come on to Substack and just have such a clear perspective, POV, and you certainly accomplished that.Lee: Thank you.Maureen: So with that, my first introduction to you was a post about your experience wearing vibrant colors over the summer and how that improved your self-esteem. For anyone who hasn’t read that newsletter yet, what changed and encouraged you to start showing up in that way?Lee: So I was actually maybe like a month and a half ago just looking through my camera roll and I noticed that most of my summer outfits—anytime I took a photo—it was some vibrant color or print. And I was like, I need to write about this because I didn’t realize how happy it was making me and how comfortable I felt in all those vibrant colors and everything.A few years ago, right when COVID happened, I was a junior in college. All my classes were online. I was isolated. I was grieving the loss of a loved one. So I was not connected to myself at all—you know, a lot of people weren’t during that time.And I started to not express myself anymore through the clothes that I was wearing. Prior to COVID and all that, I felt pretty confident in my skin and what I was wearing. My style has changed so much since then, but when COVID hit, I just started to hide myself. I hid my body. I was wearing more darker colors—nothing like the prints that I did this summer at all.And so, yeah, when I saw all the photos of myself from this summer, I wanted to write about it because it honestly surprised me that I wasn’t realizing that that self-confidence came back. And it reminded me of when we’re kids and we don’t care what anyone thinks and we’ll just wear whatever we want to wear. So, yeah.Maureen: Beautiful to hear that we can go through a period of kind of darkness and sadness and hiding, and sometimes we are lucky in the way that we can just find joy again without necessarily having to be super intentional about it. Sometimes it can just surprise us. And in that way, grief is non-linear and it’s surprising in all these ways.Were you shopping differently, or was it more just like you’d had these clothes beforehand and were just choosing to wear darker colors versus now choosing to wear bright colors? How was that materially different?Lee: That’s a good question. Some of the pieces I had, but a lot of them are new. I’ve been fortunate to work with some brands that have gifted me some items, so that has kind of propelled me out of my comfort zone—just working with different women-owned, small-owned brands.But personally, I don’t really know what it was. I just started to embrace things that maybe would have made me uncomfortable in the past, especially because I live in Florida. We had a very hot summer, and I was like, I can’t do the oversized dark shirt and leggings every day—I need to cool off. So I started to wear a lot more linen, and some of the linen pieces that I bought had prints or patterns and colors—it wasn’t just tan or white.So, you know, just making sure that I felt comfortable in extreme heat and also wanting to look cute in my own sense of style and everything.Maureen: I love that too, and this is one of the reasons that I have a podcast about this. Because I think sometimes it can feel like there’s only one way to do things.And I’m highly analytical—so when I’m shopping for my closet, nine times out of ten, it’s with extreme precision and intention and I overthink it. And I think what I’m hearing from what you’re saying is it was a little bit more organic and you were just kind of drawn toward these bright colors compared to when you were drawn toward darker colors.Am I oversimplifying that process, or was there more analytical decision-making behind that? Which, for the record, if it is very organic, I’m jealous.Lee: Right? Well, I’d say if I’m just shopping for everyday basics—like things that I can wear with five different outfits and remix—I may be a bit more analytical about that because I want to make sure it’ll last and I can get a lot of usage out of it. But, you know Like in that newsletter, I had this green caftan on. When I got that, I wasn’t like, “Yeah, I’m gonna wear this every single day.” You know what I mean? I was like, I know this is probably gonna be a piece that sits in the closet, but it makes me happy and I will wear it. But it’s not gonna be like an everyday item, you know?So I think the analytical, almost logical clothes-eye kind of goes out the window for me if it’s something I really, really like that may not be something I wear every day. Maureen: It’s awesome to give yourself permission to do that. That’s how we interject things that we didn’t even know that we wanted. Sometimes we’re just drawn to something like a moth to a flame.You also mentioned in the post there was a specific outfit that you wouldn’t have worn a few years ago. I think it was a little bit preppier or something like that. And I was just wondering—can you share more about maybe what changed your mind or how that change occurred, basically?Lee: I remember the dress you were talking about. I think it was the one where I didn’t have sleeves, and it had stripes. Yeah, so that was one of those linen pieces I was telling you about. I felt really cool in it, I didn’t get hot in that dress—it was a very comfortable piece of clothing.But a few years ago, I wouldn’t have worn it. Not because of the print or the color, but literally because of the arms—it didn’t have sleeves at all. And, you know, during COVID and isolation, I started to feel very aware of my body, but then also pick up little things that now I can look back and be like, I was being way too hard on myself.Like, I’m blessed to have this body and to be able, you know what I mean? But back then, I was just looking at my body and picking all these little things apart. And back then, I just did not like my arms out. I needed sleeves. I just wanted to be covered, you know?“I’m blessed to have this body” - Lee Alisha And so that piece—I love that dress so much today. I don’t have a second thought about my arms or anything. But like I said, that didn’t happen overnight, you know? Because I felt those insecurities like four or five years ago, and now it’s 2025, and I still have my moments and stuff. It’s not perfect, you know, but I just try to show up for myself and not be hard on myself, especially when it comes to what I’m putting on my body and how I feel, you know?Maureen: I know that you said you were grieving the loss of a loved one around that time, but it’s just crazy the way that COVID had such an impact on how we were all feeling.I also look back at pictures from a couple of years ago, and at the time I would look at those pictures and be horrified by my appearance. And it was just—like—totally normal. My body was so normal. And I just had this horrible lens on it.And now I look back at those pictures and I [see something really positive]. I see such a different version of myself. And for me, I would say partially that just comes with getting used to maybe looking different if your body’s changed.But also, I think there’s really something to what you’re saying about maybe it was just the COVID of it all — and how much time we had to just sit on our phones. I don’t know. Do you feel like that’s part of it?Lee: I mean, I kind of do, because I remember early days it was like, “Don’t go outside.” So it’s like, okay, well, I’m just going to sit inside. And sitting inside just became my normal, because like I said, all my classes were online. My classes continued to be remote until I graduated in 2022.So I was not on campus for almost a year and a half, almost two years. I just got comfortable with the four walls of my apartment—and I was like, it’s fine, it’s great, you know? That just became normal. Then, when it was time to go outside and see your friends and loved ones, that felt strange. You kind of want to hide yourself or just stay where you feel safe, you know?Maureen: I totally relate to that. I think that’s so fair. I mean, especially — I can’t even imagine college virtually. You sound very resilient and like you got through it and made the best of it, but I mean definitely, I think even now I’m still trying to figure out how to get myself out of the house sometimes.Because it still feels like—I don’t know, wrong sometimes. I get what you’re saying.Lee: Because when COVID first happened, I was like, “Oh, I am so happy to have online classes,” because I’m an introvert. I love having my own space. I was also a creative writing major, so I was like, I’m going to romanticize this. I get to sleep in, make my coffee, read my books, and do my English literature and stuff.But then, you know, a few months of that goes by and it does a number on you.But I see what you mean about going out now. I mean, I do think there’s a difference between, you know, really wanting to protect your peace and enjoy your own company—because I do that a lot toda

We’re in the middle of season two and there’s so much good yet to come! Upcoming episodes include fellow writers Lee Alisha, Traci Landy, and Anika Krueger— I cannot wait for you to hear them!Make sure you’re subscribed so you get notified when upcoming episodes drop, and consider sharing with someone you think would enjoy the show!Today’s episode features tastemaker, Parisian style enthusiast, film photographer, and all-around cool girl (who’s also really kind) OFELIA. We get into the differences between film and fashion, what it means to be a tastemaker, how dressing in Paris is different from dressing in Austin, and more. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeYou’re listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I’m Maureen McLennon Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully.Today’s guest is OFELIA, writer of All The Above on Substack. She has a discerning eye for fashion, film photography, and vibes. You’ve probably come across her What’s Everyone Wearing in Paris series, or my personal favorite, Outfits Inspired by Film, featuring her original images. Best of all, she’s a self-proclaimed outfit repeater and looks great while doing it. Ofelia, welcome to the show.Ofelia: Thank you so much for having me. I’m so excited to be here.Maureen: One of the key themes of All the Above is about your experience living in Paris, being from the U.S. originally. I’d love to hear how your style has changed between living in the U.S. and in Paris. How has the change of scenery impacted your style?Ofelia: Yeah, definitely. It’s changed quite a bit, I would say. For some additional context, I moved from Austin, Texas, where there’s maybe like two seasons—or one giant season and a couple months of mild winter. I didn’t really have to account for a lot of fluctuation. I mostly had to account for a lot of heat living in Austin.Moving to Paris, I now have to account for actually living in four different seasons, and even within a single season there’s a lot of fluctuation. I’ve had to get really good at layering, and I also have to account for how hot I’m going to get while walking places—which is something I hadn’t really had to think about before because I was driving everywhere and not moving as much.So now I start by opening the window every day and sticking my hand out to get a feel for the baseline temperature, then I either add or take off layers based on that. So, in terms of how much I’m wearing, it’s changed quite a bit.Maureen: That’s so interesting because, you know, I would think that the key change would be like, “I dress more fabulously now.” And I think you’d probably say that’s the case—but so much of what I just heard in that answer is about very practical changes. You’re more exposed to the elements, you’re walking more.It’s really interesting to talk about car culture and how that affects what we wear versus public transport culture. For me, I live in a car place right now in the Bay Area. And that means that, for example, when I was in Seattle recently, I wore Birkenstocks everywhere because the whole point was walking. But in the Bay Area, depending on what you’re doing, you’re just driving up to a restaurant. It’s really different.How do you find ways to be creative with that practical requirement versus just defaulting to what’s most convenient? Is there tension there at all?Ofelia: I think it really depends on the outdoor elements. One of my biggest struggles is the rain. I don’t have a solid rain shoe, and it’s actually really interesting—when we moved in December last year, I didn’t realize how rainy January and winter in general would be. It rained a lot.At the time, I only had a few pairs of shoes, and the ones I wore most were suede tennis shoes—not great for rain. So now, as we’re approaching that season again, I’m thinking, “Okay, I really need to get a rain shoe figured out.” I could wear tennis shoes, but my feet would get soaked. I still remember the feeling of my toes being wet outside!So yes, there is tension—but it’s mostly between utility and aesthetics. Like, how is this going to be cute while still functional?It’s interesting, though, because when we talk about comfort, I think that changes from person to person, but also within the same person from place to place.Before the pandemic, I would wear leggings, a sweater, and tennis shoes—that sounded comfortable to me. But in Paris, that’s frowned upon. I don’t really wear leggings outside of working out anymore.Now, when I think of comfort, I think, okay, I’m dressing down, but I’m still wearing jeans. Depending on the season, that might mean a flowy blouse or, like today, a sweater layered over a t-shirt.This morning I was wearing loafers, but I had to run an errand and changed into tennis shoes. The tension is still there, but I kind of balance it out throughout the day—appeasing one side of my brain at a time. Sometimes I’ll think, “My toes need a break,” so I’ll wear tennis shoes today so I can wear cute flats tomorrow.Maureen: Yeah, and maybe this is encouragement—but I’d love if you wrote a post about what Parisians wear in the rain! The Bay Area is surprisingly rainy—we really only have two seasons, the wet and the dry. When it rains, it pours. I’ve been trying to figure out my own rain situation, so very selfishly, I’d love a post on that.Ofelia: On it. I think I have more mental capacity this year to do it versus last year.Maureen: I have a bit of an ephemeral question, but I’m hoping you’ll go there with me. I’d love to talk about the intersection between your film photography and your interest in personal style. How do those two relate to you? And how do they differ?Ofelia: I think that’s actually a really interesting question. I think they both exist on a spectrum, and I’d say they’re quite similar in a few senses.Film photography has so many ranges within it, right? I’m not sure how familiar you are with film cameras, but you can buy a point-and-shoot, a disposable, or you can get really technical and buy manual cameras where you’re adjusting every tiny thing.And I think when we also think about style, it’s similar. We can hop on the trends and say, “I like that, I like that,” and that’s totally valid and fine. Or we can really discern what we actually like—what makes us feel interested or alive, what gives us that fun spark inside.For me, film photography does that—it gives me that same sense of discovery and play. So when I compare both mediums, they’re on the same spectrum. One is often more expensive and technical, while the other can be looser and more forgiving.Maureen: And which one feels more technical for you personally?Ofelia: For me, film photography is more technical.In terms of style, I guess let me backtrack a little. I didn’t really start thinking about how I was getting dressed until post-pandemic, which is interesting because that’s also when I started getting into film photography—around the same time.A while back, I wrote an article about what I called the Five Hierarchies of Fashion. At the very base level, you just need something to wear. Once that need is satisfied, you might start asking, “Do I actually like what I’m wearing?”Then, after that, you start thinking about the fabrics—how they feel on your body, how long they last. Once you’ve figured that out, maybe you start asking about sustainability practices.So, to me, I’ve reached a certain level of technicality within fashion. But compared to others, I’m not extremely technical yet—like when it comes to proportions or sleeve cuts, I’m still learning.So in that sense, film photography feels more technical for me because I dove deep into that world much more rapidly. But the technicality in fashion absolutely exists—it just depends on what people are interested in at a given moment. And those interests can shift drastically over the years.Maureen: I’d love your perspective on that “ramp up” between the two. From my point of view, clothing technicality feels extremely high-effort and high-resource to climb, in terms of that hierarchy you mentioned. How do you feel the two compare? Does one have a higher barrier to entry than the other? Or does it just depend on your level of interest?Ofelia: I think it depends on your level of interest.You could very easily start flirting with film photography by picking up a point-and-shoot camera—it’s a little more advanced than a disposable, but maybe it has a zoom lens or lets you turn the flash on and off. That kind of gets you in the mindset of thinking, Okay, I want a slightly better photo than a disposable, but I’m not quite ready for full manual yet.And fashion is similar. We can think, Okay, I want a white t-shirt. And that’s such a big, ongoing debate—what’s the best white t-shirt? But I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer. It’s more like: What are you looking for? How do you want it to lay on your body? Do you want a baby tee? Do you want pointelle? Or even—do you want a white t-shirt at all?And so I think it’s really the curiosity around what you’re trying to get to that pushes and propels you in that direction.Maureen: Hmm, I love that. And such a good analogy too. You know, separately, I’ve been thinking about this same concept—I didn’t realize you had an amazing post on it! I’m going to read it right after and link it in the show notes.I’ve been thinking about that idea of “levels” too. I feel like personally I’m phasing up into a higher level of personal style. For a while, I was just getting dressed, putting clothes on my body—it felt very survival mode, with some moments of joy and self-actualization.But now I feel like I’m moving into a place of, oh, I really do like this, and I don’t connect with that, in a much more intentional and exciting way.You kind of alluded to where you feel that you are—are you trying to go further up the

Today’s episode is a fun one, featuring a very popular content creator on Instagram—who may be less well known on Substack. She’s a real treat. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeYou’re listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I’m Maureen McLennon Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully.Today’s guest is Cara Wengen, aka plus size Zoë Kravitz, which is obviously iconic. She’s a big thrifter, works in an art gallery, major, and has the best taste in music. Welcome to the show, Cara.Cara: Thank you so much. I’m so excited to be here.Maureen: Likewise, I’m excited to talk to you. You just kind of recently barreled in, in the absolute best way, through my Instagram feed. And I was like—hold on, I need to know this person. She needs to come on the podcast. Everyone needs to know about what she’s doing. So I’m so glad that you said yes.I’d just love to really kick us off with your content creation origin story. What got you to start posting your outfits online? I know it’s kind of a scary thing.Cara: Yeah, so I think probably very similarly to many other people, I was just kind of scrolling. I don’t want to say addicted to TikTok, but using TikTok frequently and Instagram frequently and seeing these people who are getting PR sent to them—like free stuff.And I was like, mail is so cool in general. Like when you get a personalized letter, you’re like, this is awesome. Imagine getting clothing that you like sent to you or shoes or jewelry. And I was like, I want that to happen to me. So for that reason alone, I was like, I’m just going to start posting.So that was probably like 2023. I was dabbling, just kind of casually posting once in a while. And then I made a pact to myself: in January of 2024, my New Year’s resolution was I’m going to post a video a day. Might miss some days, if that happens, that’s cool. But I’m going to post nonstop for all of 2024 and just see what happens.And that’s honestly how it started. I started with outfit videos and then a lot of people were asking where I got my clothes and how I was finding them, and that turned into more thrifting videos, which is really my niche little corner of the internet. So it’s been wonderful. I’ve created an incredible community of people, and that is really the gift of it all. It’s not the PR, it’s the people. But yeah, that’s why I started.Maureen: Yeah. And what’s the experience been like to actually be posting and being online? How does it feel?Cara: Yeah. So I would say that at first, when I first got started and really started pouring effort into creating content, it was overwhelming. You know, I didn’t understand how to use the platforms, how to edit. I wasn’t in like a rhythm of filming and I kind of got burnt out.And I feel like that happens to a lot of creators when they first start out. They’re like, oh, I’m gonna do all of this stuff and keep going and going and going, and then nothing’s gonna happen, so I’m just gonna give up. And if that doesn’t happen to everybody, that’s amazing, but a lot of the people that I’ve spoken to, that happens to.So that was really frustrating at first, and I just kind of soldiered through it, brought those concerns to the community of people that were actually cheering me on every single day. And they were like, just keep going, just keep doing it. And that’s what I’ve been doing, and that’s the mentality I’ve had.Instead of killing myself trying to create content, I kind of have now found a way to incorporate it into my everyday life. So I have a routine. I film my outfit video in the same location every day, same time. If I’m going thrifting, I automatically have my little tripod and I’m filming everything. Everything is content for me now, which has really changed the way that I’m interacting with creating content.Editing gets a lot easier after you know how to do it—that’s probably one of the hardest things to learn. And then also just communicating with people and engaging, that’s important too. And I think that setting time limits for yourself for that is also really important, because I think it’s really easy to get caught up in, “Oh, I have to reply to every single comment.” You should, you should, you know, for your sake and your page—but I think also you need to get out of the online world and into your real life a lot.That’s just something that I had to kind of learn along the way and along the journey as well.Maureen: It’s like set time limits for yourself to do those interactions and that engagement. And I wanted to ask you about this because, you know, as a creator myself in different ways, I find so many parallels with the experience of writing content with the experience of personal style.In the way that you have to try new things, especially if you want your personal style to move in a new direction or if you’re trying to push yourself out of your comfort zone—it can take time to get used to. And so I just think it’s really fun to see the comparison, and not just talk about personal style all the time, because I think it’s good to have inspiration from everywhere.So I guess I’m curious—with that disclaimer—how, if anything, do you think your personal style has changed through being a content creator? Or do you feel that it’s pretty similar?Cara: Yeah, no, my style has definitely changed. And I attest that to the fact of documentation. Literally, that was my pact to myself for 2024: every day I’m waking up and posting a video. So every day I have footage of myself on camera. And in doing that, you kind of see—oh, that looks good (or what I think looks good, because that’s all relative). Or, oh, I can really see the way that I’m more confident in this outfit versus that outfit. Why is that?You notice things like, oh, I’m wearing this skirt in a lot of videos—that must be one of my staple items that I’m reaching for all the time. Those things just kind of naturally happen. It’s been super interesting, because pre-documentation, my style was just kind of all over the place. So if anything, it’s really helped me hone in on what I prefer to wear.And also I get inspired by other content creators and celebrities, because I’m so online that I’m exposed to more—which is really cool. Like, I’ll see something and think, “Ooh, I like that. I would have never thought to do that, but let me see if I can go thrift that.” And it’s just been really fun.If anything, I just feel more like myself now than ever before, which is really, really cool.Maureen: I want to stick on that for a second. What does it mean to feel like yourself? Maybe an example or a moment—you mentioned looking back at videos and noticing that you’re more confident in a particular outfit versus another. What does that confidence look like to you in the video? How can you see it now in a way that maybe you didn’t see in the moment?Cara: Yeah, I think it’s overall body posture—or the way I’m looking at myself in the camera. Because I don’t always film with the back camera, even though you’re “supposed” to. I still use my front camera a lot, so I’m literally looking at a mirror of myself. And I can tell—in certain looks—I’m feeling myself more.Like, you know when you’re feeling yourself and when you’re not. There are certain moments where I’m like, “Oh, I’m really working this.” And I don’t mean that in a cocky way, I mean it in a very reflective, real-time way, like: wow, you’re really feeling yourself.That’s been cool and interesting, because especially as somebody who lives in a larger body, I normally wouldn’t put on a tight shirt and think, “I feel great about myself.” But then when I’m reacting in real time to the footage of myself, I’m like, “No, I’m actually feeling myself. This feels good.”And it kind of makes you think—maybe I’ve been doing this wrong the whole time. Like, it doesn’t matter what size I am. I can wear whatever I want as long as I feel good, it’s comfortable, and it’s what I like. That’s all that matters.Maureen: Yeah. I mean, personally, I’m struggling with that right now, so I’d love to talk about it more—these limiting beliefs about what we can and cannot wear based on what our body looks like. Or even more than that—for me, it’s about what we’re used to seeing or not seeing.And for me personally—and I mean this with no pressure, only gratitude—watching you wear just the best things (and just looking cool, in my subjective perspective) has been encouraging. And in your subjective perspective, I can feel when you’re feeling yourself.It’s been really beautiful to see your work and what you’re wearing. I feel very encouraged, because there are some things I’ve told myself not to wear. And I’m actively looking for examples that tell me otherwise, and then trying to experience that myself.Maureen: I wanted to go back to what you were saying about maybe in the past you wouldn’t have wanted to wear a particular type of tight t-shirt or something like that. Can you walk me through—if you can think of it—the experience of getting comfortable with that? Like, let’s say you just wore it one time. Did you immediately feel comfortable, or was it something you had to try over and over again? What was that like?Cara: Yeah, it’s definitely not immediate. I would say that, just like you mentioned, seeing other people be so okay with styling pieces they might not necessarily be “told” to pick—that helps. Like, you see another size 16 wearing a little baby tee and you think, “Why can’t I do that?” So you try it, and at first you’re like, “Maybe this isn’t right.” Then you do it again, and you’re like, “No, I think it could be good.” Then you find your perfect baby tee and you’re like, “Oh no, this is me.”So it’s not quick or immediate. Even now, if I wake up and put on a baby tee, it just might not be a baby tee kind of day. And that’s okay too. You just have to be kinde

The second episode of season two is here! Enjoy this episode with Harriet Hadfield. Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeYou’re listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I’m Maureen McLennon Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today’s guest is Harriet Hadfield, the writer of Harry Styles—that name!—on Substack. As an early One Direction fan, you know what I mean. You know her from her nuanced, vulnerable writing about career transitions and mental health challenges, just as much as her playful and creative styling suggestions. Or perhaps you’ve seen her extensive backlog of makeup tutorials or journal making on her YouTube channel, Harry Makes it Up. However you’ve met her, you are sure to have loved her. Harry, welcome to the show.Harriet: My gosh, that intro was like the most lovely thing ever. I’m like, can you just send me that so can put that in like a happy book? Maureen: I will print it out, I’ll hand write a note. You can keep it wherever. Harriet: So lovely. Thank you so much Maureen.Maureen: You wrote it yourself, you did all those things. So you made it easy. Well, I wanted to start off by referencing your recent undercover work, a post that you put up on Substack, where you identified some themes and what folks on the East side of LA are wearing, which anyone that’s been following you for a minute would see that it’s a little bit different from your typical style. There’s lots of color. And, I just thought that was really fun because you reinterpret those looks with your own clothes. So I would just love to hear like, how did you come up with that idea? And just tell me, was it so fun to write?Harriet: It really was like the most fun thing. And I think sometimes to me, my writing, there are some things that I just know I wanna write. And then generally this situation, I’d gone to a coffee shop with my laptop and I got there, my laptop was dead. And I was like, man, there’s no chargers around. And I always carry a notebook with me, as you know, I love my journals. So I was like, okay, I’m just gonna people watch, which is another hobby of mine. And I just started writing what I was seeing, like socks with shoes, canvas totes. It was almost like a shopping list. I just kind of was documenting what I was seeing. And then I said to my husband, he was at the coffee shop with me, I was like, I’m Harriet the Spy. And then I think that whole thing, was like, this is so fun because like you said, I think my style is a little bit different generally to where I live and I don’t in any way say that to sound like it’s better than. Again, I think this is where style can feel really problematic.But coming from London, I think my style has always felt a bit dressier. But I love taking inspiration from anywhere and everywhere. So I also think I’m currently on another no-buy. I love being able to think how can I make my existing wardrobe work harder for me? And also like you said, like intuitive style in my opinion is about trying stuff. It’s about experimenting. So I love pushing myself out my comfort zone in the safety of my own home and knowing like, okay, here’s my barometer to decide what feels comfortable to leave the house in. What bits do I keep? What bits do I maybe go, cool, I tried that, it’s not for me. But for me getting dressed is like playing dress up. It always takes me back to being a kid and just wanting to try things.Maureen: How do you know when it feels right and you’re ready to leave the house in something versus like, I need to tweak this a little bit more or it doesn’t feel right?Harriet:That’s a really good question and part of me wants to say there’s lots of ways to answer that but I also think intuition and self-trust is something we build. So for me it’s both a physical feeling in my body, it’s kind of like a mental knowing of... I think as well for me it’s like a spectrum of like am I uncomfortable because it feels new or is it uncomfortable because...I just would feel more conscious wearing this than not wearing it. And I think if it’s the former, like, oh, this just feels new, then this is why I like doing, like, play dates in my own wardrobe at home, because it gives me time to get used to seeing myself in a new way. It gives me space and time to be like, ooh, there’s something that keeps making me look in the mirror and go, I’m not mad at it. I don’t hate it. And sometimes I think you have to start there before you can get to a place of, oh my god, this and sometimes the my god I love this does happen very instantaneously but for me I think it’s almost it’s it’s learning to develop patience with when I’m trying something new it isn’t always gonna click straight away and there will be some things where try as I might I’m like looks great on everyone else but it’s a no for me like I think it’s that it’s it’s building that self-trust which I would love to say I could tell you exactly how you do that. But I think it’s, I think to start with, it’s maybe wanting to build the self-trust. I think that’s a good place to be. Like, I think I’ve outsourced my tastes when I was younger so much. I look for someone to tell me what style is, what would be right. Again, you know, coming of like the noughties and the, you know, 90s teenager, like I grew up with, everything should be flattering, everything should be done, you know, avoid horizontal stripes.So I’ve had to unlearn a lot as well, but I think that started with wanting to unlearn it. Like there came a point where I was like, I would like to make decisions that feel good for me, even if other people don’t get it. And I think that’s a good place to start is just wanting to kind of like build that trust.Maureen: Can you be my co-host on this podcast because...Harriet: You Anytime.Maureen: I mean, everything you said…there’s no bows that we can tie. There’s a reason that this is an 18 plus episode and growing podcast because I don’t think that there’s a one answer on how to build this self trust, but it’s like you said, it’s a choice that we’re making and, something that we have to put time and attention into doing. yeah.Harriet: Yeah. No. And I think make it fun, whatever fun looks like for you. Like for me, I’m still a big kid at heart. Like I wanna put 90s boy band music on while I have a wardrobe play date and you know, have a sing and a dance in my closet. And I’m always like, how can I make this feel like play versus something I have to get right?Maureen: Are there any outfits that you tried recently or as a result of that post that, was there like anything that stands out that you’re like, I did this new thing and it felt really good. What was that like?Harriet: I think the socks and shoes I see come round again and again. I think it’s one of those things that in fashion, it’s been used in so many different decades. I see people, like I I live on the East side in LA. I see it a lot on the East side and I always appreciate it on other people. I’ve just always been like, especially trainers and socks, loafers and socks. And I remember realizing at one point, I don’t actually own a pair of white socks. I only own black socks for the winter with my boots. And I remember wearing a pair of black socks over leggings with like a really oversized blazer and then like a white strappy sandal and I loved the contrast of that. I remember thinking like, oh this feels like me. Again, that spectrum I talked about, it was a very instantaneous yes. And so because of that, I was like, okay, well what if it’s not a loafer in a sock for me? What if it’s just a different shoe in a sock?So again, I kind of like the same Harriet the Spy thing. I’m very investigative. Like, I don’t even think that’s a word. But like, I’m always trying to be like, what is the bit I do like? Like, warmer, warmer. And I remember I had this pair of shoes that were actually from the Alison Bornstein, Jack Irwin collection when she did that launch. And I’ve got to be honest, I don’t always wear them. And they’re suede and I live in LA, so I have no excuse. But I was just like, I need to wear these more. Again, there’s things in my wardrobe where I’m like, I love this item. If I’m not wearing it, is it because I need to find new ways to wear it that excite me? Is it just that I haven’t put it enough into heavy rotation? And like I said, I didn’t have any white socks, but Dave had some sports socks with like a pink and a brown rim around the top. And I was like, well, if I fold them and scrunch them, I can kind of make it look like a white sock. And it was like a thick sports socks. I was like, okay, this is really not comfortable, but it’s kind like I have this concept called like the bridge philosophy where it’s like where can you try something that is like point A of the spectrum of starring stuff and being like, okay, that’s my beginning point. And from doing that, although it was like uncomfy because the socks were too thick, I was like, I kind of like this. And again, for me, I have to always add something dressy into the mix. I feel like when there’s like a more formal looking bag or something that feels quite, I’m trying to what the word is. Like for me, I love grandma and granddad. That’s always like, feel like when people say like, what’s your style? I’m like, I don’t really have words, but I’m like, what a granddad would wear, a grandma would wear, or a librarian, or a geography teacher, like any of those probably would like cross my path some way. Again, yeah, and I just think like trying on those shoes with the socks, I was like, maybe I might get round to buying socks. So I think it’s, whether it’s going to be something that becomes fully into part of my everyday dress, who knows? But again, I like that experimenting, I like the play of like, there’s something in this that I’m like, ⁓ that’s cute, I like

Intuitive Style podcast is back and better than ever! I took a break over the summer to rest, rejuvenate, and overhaul my recording method from top-to-bottom! We’re talking: new backdrop, haircut, logo, audio-set-up and even a new theme song created specifically for the show! While working a full-time job and continuing to write this newsletter. So when I say I took a break, I am speaking aspirationally.That said, we have an exciting series ahead with episodes featuring Substack gems Harriet Hadfield, and OFELIA (and way more!) plus a few new faces you’ll be sure to love. Despite my best attempts, this podcast continues to be 100% reader supported. If you enjoy what we’re doing here, please consider sharing with someone you think would love the show so we can get the word out!Onto the show…Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeWelcome back to Season 2 of the Intuitive Style Podcast!I'm Maureen McLennon Welton. I can't wait for you to see these episodes. I think it's going to be a fabulous season, kicking off with our guest today, Asta / Aastha. This is a great conversation. I think you're really going to enjoy getting to know her a little bit better.And this podcast is entirely community supported. So please consider liking, sharing, subscribing, and really just getting the word out there so that more people can find this show.And without further ado, let's get into the episode!Maureen: You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I'm Maureen Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully.Today's guest is Aastha, the author behind the fabulous Substack Fit Happens—which is of course a fabulous name. Aastha loves wearing the brand Tibi, styling clothes in different ways, sharing about color mixing and silhouette, and chatting about weird shoes. Aastha, welcome to the show.Aastha: Thank you, thank you, and thank you for the introduction.Maureen: I feel that your newsletter, Fit Happens, is a good foil for mine in the way that you seem to have really honed the skill of dressing intuitively and do it with relative ease. Can you share a little bit about what dressing intuitively means to you and how you foster that sensibility?Aastha: Yes, yes, for sure. But before I jump into the answer, I do want to say just a few words to embarrass you a little bit, Maureen, because I'm just such a big fan of everything that you're doing. And I really appreciate your vulnerability in how you put yourself out there.I've been a big fan of your podcast too, and I really appreciate how welcoming you make the space for everyone and hold space for everyone. That’s why I was very excited to do this. So I wanted to officially do that after you start the recording—so you cannot take it out. So don’t take this out.Now, let me answer the question.So, it’s something that… just the idea of living intuitively has been very important to me for, I don’t know, like 15, 20 years at this point. And I don’t even remember what sparked that. But in terms of what it means to dress, it’s about—there is so much out there that tells you what is right, what is wrong. And there is no objective truth about how you dress, but also about how you live. Like, the kind of decisions you make. For example, I am here in Los Angeles and my family is in India, which means I’m probably not going to see my parents that many times in my lifetime. But who’s to say whether that’s right or wrong? That’s just a very big example to begin with.But truly, there are so many decisions you need to make for your own life where there is no objective way to say what is right or what is wrong. And to actually be living a life where you don’t have regrets, it’s so important that you tap into your intuition and what feels right in that moment.And intuitive style and intuitive dressing to me is just a capsule form of that exact same idea—that you wear what feels right in that moment. And as long as it feels right, you’re going to have a good day and you’re not going to worry too much about, “is this right or is this wrong?”Even if I look back at my style five years ago, ten years ago, fifteen years ago—I don’t have any regrets, because I know it felt right in that moment. Who cares if it doesn’t feel right now? If I had fun in that moment, that’s enough.It’s kind of like: if you have fun in the present, the past and the future take care of themselves.Maureen: I was going to ask about the regret of it all—you already answered. So what I heard from that is basically the only way to prevent future regret, which is this scary intangible thing we can’t predict, is by trusting that we’re making the best choices in the moment. And if we change our minds later, that doesn’t mean anything about what we did in the past.Aastha: No, no, it doesn’t. And also, I think when you live long enough, you realize you will change your mind. That is normal, right? So if that’s going to happen anyway, why worry too much about it? When people ask me for career advice, I usually say, just do what feels good to you in the moment. Because if you have fun every day, you will also be having fun every day in the future, right? So the future takes care of itself if you just focus on the present, basically.Maureen: I did a meditation before this, so it's really ringing true for me. No, I love this—such a good way to explain dressing intuitively. I know we'll talk about it more throughout the call.Switching gears slightly, I love to talk about the Tibi of it all. I know that Tibi, the brand—you’re not affiliated with them, you don’t use affiliate links—but you mostly or very often wear their clothing. And I just think it's so interesting, to me and to other people, to see someone really living authentically with a particular brand. That's also, like, sometimes divisive, as I think you’ve shared on your social media and on Substack.So I’d just like to hear a little bit more about the origin—how you found Tibi and what it is about that brand that resonates with you so much?Aastha: Yeah, it's such a great question. It is a big part of my style life for sure, and my closet, right? To the point where, because I'm a big Indyx user too—and you know how you can choose whether you want to see the brand names or the item names—the default is brand name. And I was like, that is useless to me because all I’ll see is Tibi, Tibi, Tibi. That does nothing for me. So I changed it to item name.But the thing about me is that I really, really dislike searching for things, shopping, and trying on different things—figuring out what's going to work and what's not. I just feel so frustrated when I have to spend time doing that. I think it's such a waste of time and there are so many other things that I’d rather be doing.In the past, I think pretty early on, I learned about my body type and what works for me. And the thing about most brands—unless they're very expensive brands, like Margiela, Comme des Garçons, that level—is that they’re not very consistent in the lines and the clothing that they make.So, for example, with Anthropologie or J.Crew, those kinds of brands—they just make anything and everything. When I would wear some of those brands (and I’m a big Anthropologie fan, just as an example), it was like: I’d have to look and not understand exactly what they’re doing this season. It would be all over the place. Some stuff worked, some stuff didn’t. Just very annoying.I am a fan of Issey Miyake. That said, their lines are consistent, but those lines don’t look great on me. There are very few pieces that actually work for me.Anyway, long story long—I was in New York, and I wanted to go to the Issey Miyake store because I was willing to spend time finding the one thing that might work for me. But the store was very busy—it’s a small store in Soho—and I didn’t want to deal with that. So I was like, let me just walk around and see what else is out here.Tibi was right around the corner. I didn’t know anything about the brand because it’s not that well known. I’m also not very engaged in style content on social media—at least before Substack—so I didn’t know anything about them.I walked in, and there was a stylist there, Grace, who was super nice. She talked about the brand, I was interested in some of the clothes, she helped me try them on—and I instantly fell in love. Literally 90% of the stuff looked good on me and the lines worked well for me. I ended up buying three things, walked out still not knowing about the style classes or anything like that.Then I did a few email exchanges with Grace afterward to figure out shoe sizing—because their sizing is all over the place. That’s when she told me about the style class, I started watching it, and the rest is history.But truly, I think what drew me to them is that they are very consistent in the kind of clothes they make. And most of their lines work really well on me. They do make some clothes where the lines don’t work well on me, and I just know that and steer clear of those silhouettes.Maureen: Yeah. And I know from your writing that you have a specific definition of what “lines” mean and what looks good on you. I just wanted to take an opportunity to clarify—what does looking good mean for you personally?Aastha: It's such a great question. I think for me, it's a combination of what aesthetically looks good. I think that is important, because sometimes we gaslight ourselves or others into thinking, “Oh, it doesn't matter. You know, it's fine. It's not about flattering.” And it is not about flattering.Maureen: I agree.Aastha: So that whole idea of the lines working for me—one is, is it giving me aesthetically what I want? And two, is it expressing what I want to express?For example, my body type—and this is a caveat because it might come up throughout our chat—I'm very neutral in how I talk about my body. Hopefully this is not trig

This is the LAST episode of Season One of Intuitive Style the podcast, featuring one of my long-time inspirations, Christine Platt. I’ve kept up with Christine’s social media for years, since I first discovered Minimalism in earnest back in 2020. Her approach to intentional-living is unparalleled, leading with introspection, questioning everything, and being open to surprise. She’s also recently joined Substack herself at Lessons on Liberation, give her a follow! I can’t think of a better person to wrap up the first season with. While we’re on break for summer, you can catch up with all of the incredible previous guest episodes here. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.Maureen: You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I'm Maureen Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest really needs no introduction, but I'm going to give her her flowers anyway. She's a multi-genre author, a trailblazer for representation in the lifestyle and wellness space. And a voice so many of us turn to for wisdom and inspiration. You might already follow her on Instagram or perhaps, you know, her beautiful book, The Afro-Minimalist Guide to Living with Less. I'm honored to welcome her to the show, Christine Platt.Christine: Thank you so much for having me, Maureen. I'm happy to be here.Maureen: Likewise, I'm so excited to get to talk to you today. I'll just jump in with one of the aspects of your work that really resonates with me. Especially reflected by the title of your upcoming book, Less is Liberation, is how you move towards what is good rather than simply away from what's bad. And so you center alignment, possibility, empowerment, rather than focusing on restriction or lack or even comparison, right? And that approach has really stayed with me and makes me feel empowered, loved, deeply capable, all the best things. Can you share how you came to see the world in that way? And how did you learn to find expansion where others might see limitation?Christine: You know, this is the new sort of muscle that I have learned to exercise. It's almost like we're taught to be hard on ourselves. You know what I mean? So for so many years, I was just so hard on myself. And, you know, there's a quote in The Afro-Minimalist Guide that is still a mantra that I live by, which is: I am not a grown woman, I am a growing woman. And I think that that mantra helped me sort of move from this space of like, “You should know better, you should…” you know what I mean? Just being really negative and hard on myself to being in this place of like, wow, you're growing, you're expanding, you're learning something new every day.And the other part of that quote is, And may I always be growing. So I'm not a grown woman, I'm a growing woman, and may I always be growing. And I think that leaves space for us to not be so hard on ourselves and understand we're all students of life. We're all trying to figure it out. And there's just no reason for us to be as hard on ourselves as we are. Like when I look back on my younger years, I'm like, I was so mean to myself. You know what I mean? I was so hard on myself—and why? And again, I think so much of it is learned behavior. So learning to look at myself, reframing a lot of what I've been told as a child, unlearning a lot of what I've been told by society, and really getting into the space of like, you know what? Let me love myself. Let me love myself through all of these life lessons, through these journeys. And it's just been beautiful. I mean, I think what a gift, right? To be able to reflect, sit back with ourselves, learn from— I don’t want to say mistakes—so many of the lessons that we have had throughout our lifetime. And really look at them through a lens of love instead of being so critical and understand that they have really helped shape and make us who we are.Maureen: So I'd love to hear from your perspective—could you share a little more detail on how do you actually change that self-talk in the micro moments? Do you have an approach to catching those negative thoughts?Christine: Yeah. I mean, I think we catch them all the time, right? They're more like limiting beliefs—that's what I speak to them as in Less is Liberation. They’re these limiting beliefs that have become a part of our narrative, that have really started to take over our lives, become rules that we live by. They influence our behaviors and what we think about ourselves. And in those moments, it’s almost like catching yourself, like you said, in real time. When I hear myself being critical, just pausing—the power of pause has been a big part of my practice. And that is pausing when I'm saying something to myself and I'm like, wait, where did that come from? Pausing to self-assess, pausing to be introspective. And then in that moment, reframing. Because it's in that reframing where we get to tell ourselves new stories, where we get to look at past circumstances that may have truly been life-altering and defining for us in one way—and reframe them in another way that becomes more empowering.So for example—excuse me, here in DC the pollen is crazy, so I’m going to apologize now for any coughing—but for example, being very critical of ourselves and saying something like, “Man, I just should have worked harder on that,” even when we know that we gave something our all. Pausing to say, “What—you did work hard. What makes you think that you could have worked harder?” And it starts this drill-down of messaging and conditioning. And it’s just like, “Well, I could have worked harder because I went to bed at nine. I could have probably stayed up until eleven.” And then: “Well, why do you feel like you need to stay up until eleven?” “Well, I was taught…” You know what I mean? It’s a lot of self-talk.And I think that’s a part of “doing the work” that people don’t really talk about—is that it’s really conversations that we have with ourselves. We spend so much time seeking external validation. We spend so much time looking for answers outside of ourselves, when all the while, the answers are right within us. And so doing that introspective work, asking myself “why?”—repeatedly drilling down—is where I found out like, man, I really am a people pleaser. I didn’t realize that I was a people pleaser, right? Because I’d reframed it in other ways: “I’m just helpful,” “I’m just kind,” “I’m just sharing,” right? And then really sitting with myself one day and being like, no, this is people-pleasing behavior. Why? Where did this come from?That work—that reframing—it almost has to happen either in real time or through being introspective. So if you can’t catch it in real time, make time every day to be introspective. But what most of us do—and I’m not pointing fingers, because I feel like the way our lives are, the way society is set up, we live in this capitalist world, we’ve been taught to consume and work—most of us don’t make time for that introspection. We don’t make time to self-assess. But in those little moments of self-assessment is where that reframing happens. It’s where you get to reclaim your narrative, reclaim yourself, and really start to do things differently.And I like to say, we can replace our limiting beliefs with liberating beliefs. So we can say—man, it’s funny, I’ve worked through so many I can’t even think of one! But I’ll try. Like one was: “I have to work hard,” or “I have to get it done or no one else is going to do it.” Replacing that with a liberating belief: “I am not the only one who is capable of doing it. Other people are also able to do it. And me giving them time and space to do that is also enlightening and helpful for their journey.” Just replacing it in real time with something that is liberating, as opposed to berating ourselves all the time.So if I can think of a practice or a “how to,” it is just: make time every day to think about, “Where did this thought come from?” We know the thoughts that aren’t serving us. Then question it—just do a little inquiry.Maureen: Yeah.Christine: Don't know. Have you ever heard of the book... oh my goodness. I can, I can see it—it's Michael Singer and...Maureen: Yeah.Christine: It is...Maureen: Is...Christine: You...Maureen: This...Christine: Know...Maureen: The...Christine: Like...Maureen: Untethered Soul?Christine: I'm talking...Maureen: I'm...Christine: Yes.Maureen: Obsessed with that book.Christine: Oh my God. It's so good. So, you know what I'm about to say, which is that inner roommate, man. It's our inner roommate. And when he talks about—I don't know if you've listened to the audiobook—but the audiobook is so funny because...Maureen: I'll check it out.Christine: Yeah, like you really—I have the physical copy and the audiobook too—but the audiobook is so funny because you really get to hear how our inner roommate is like so unhinged, right?Maureen: Yes.Christine: So it's like, we have that thought like, "Man, I should have worked harder"—that inner roommate. And for those who haven't read The Untethered Soul, first of all, you should. And then secondly, what we're talking about is like our psyche, that part of ourselves that narrates our life around us and what's happening. But we become, I don't know, like beholden to that voice. And we think it is a part of us. Right? And so if we have that thought—"Man, I should have worked harder"—our inner roommate is like, "Yeah, you should have. You know who I bet was working harder? So-and-so. And you know what? I bet so-and-so is going to get that promotion at night," right?So I've also learned to silence my inner roommate and distinguish between what I'm thinking and feeling and what my psyche is just narrating based on my experiences and life around me. It's not me. And I think that book has been so crucial in helping me learn how to reframe and reclaim my narrative

You’re reading the second-to-last episode of Season One of Intuitive Style. While we’re on break for summer, you can catch up with all of the incredible previous guest episodes here. Next week, we be our season finale with mindful living extraordinaire Christine Platt. Stay tuned!I’m delighted to share this week’s episode with much-awaited guest, Jennifer Cook of mom friend! We discuss everything from how Jennifer’s professional experience in fashion impacts her personal style to what she most enjoys writing for Substack! Enjoy.Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.Maureen: You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I'm Maureen. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Jennifer Cook from mom friend. Jennifer is a Brooklynite with a job in fashion. Chic. You know her from her weekly recaps covering everything from what's happening in politics to what the moms are wearing at Space Club. Jennifer, welcome to the show.Jennifer: Thank you so much for having me. It's so nice to meet you.Maureen: Likewise, I've been reading mom friend for a little while. I'm not even a mom and what you're writing is still really interesting from the fashion insider perspective—just like life in Brooklyn. I like catching up with what Mom Friend's up to.I took a look at your about page and it really struck me. You said, “when something becomes your job and pays your rent, it's easy to become numb to it. This page has helped relight my curiosity and interest around the industry as a whole, and I love being able to write about it and be in it at the same time.” I don't work in fashion even a little bit, so I would just love to hear a little bit more about your day job in fashion and how writing in your free time feels different.Jennifer: Yeah, I have been working in the fashion industry on the business side for about thirteen years now. I started on the retail side when I was like fifteen, so I've always been around retail and fashion. It's just kind of ingrained in my bones and who I am. But that said, when you work in something, it becomes a little monotonous. Or when it becomes your paycheck and your livelihood, it can kind of lose some of the luster.Part of the reason I got into fashion was because I loved it. I loved the clothes. I loved retail. I loved the energy it brought. I loved the people, the artistry, the creativeness of it. Being on the business side for the last decade plus, it lost a little bit of its luster. So in writing the Substack and developing mom friend, it's been so fun to kind of find that playfulness again where it's not so dependent on—my livelihood is not dependent on it. I can play with it, I can have fun, I can explore, I can learn, I can engage with it in a way that's a little bit different from my nine to five.In the last year or so, I started a new job. I'm a buyer now at a store in Soho in New York City, and I like to laugh about it and say that I just shop with someone else's money for a living, which is not super far off from the truth. But it still has that expectation that you're doing it for someone else—for a store with a different personality, a different customer, a different viewpoint. So on the Substack, it's fun for me to just do things for me. It's what I like. It's what I'm finding. It's what I'm resonating with as opposed to what I'm getting paid to find for someone else. That part has been a lot of fun.Maureen: That's a really clear and powerful distinction. When you're shopping for the retailer, it's not necessarily about your taste. It's also about what is going to sell, right? Just based off of some things that I've read from you. Is that kind of a fair shake?Jennifer: Absolutely. There's so much data these days behind my job. So it is kind of a gut feeling you have. It's a taste level. It's knowing your customer. But it's also looking at metrics like selling and developing merchandising plans based on how many iterations of a short sleeve you might need. It's looking at profit margins. These days, where it's being made and where it's shipping from is all the more important. So there's so many factors that come into how I'm buying for the store versus how I look at fashion and style just for myself.I've been lucky in this role. I've been able to bring a lot of my own personal taste and style and preferences into it. So I feel very fortunate that that's been afforded to me. But at the same time, there's so many other things that go into that job that are based on data and numbers and metrics and getting to know a different customer than I am.Our store is in Soho, New York. I live in Brooklyn. For those not in New York, those two things are worlds away from one another. The style that you see in Brooklyn and the style of people roaming around Soho—it's vastly different, even being just a few miles apart. So it's really interesting to have to kind of capture that information, process it, and then feed it back in a different way through the store and through my own style.Maureen: Totally cool if this is too much information from your company perspective, but what is your customer base like then for the brand?Jennifer: We started many years ago as a menswear brand. So our core customer is a guy. I kind of call him the LinkedIn bro of New York. You know the type—he's a corporate bro, he likes nice things, he's an aspirational customer. He's not totally buying luxury, but he's also not shopping at Zara. He wants things that feel good, that look good, that are basic and easy to wear and don't take a lot of styling. That's always been our core customer.In the last year, we've transitioned into becoming more of a multi-brand concept store. So we now have women's apparel, home goods, accessories, footwear. It's been a lesson in trying to figure out who that new customer is and how we get new people in the door.Being where we are in Soho, it is also very tourist-driven. It's striking that right balance between basics, vacation clothes, and fun grab-and-go items for people to remember their trip by. It really spans a wide range of customers. But it's also ever-changing. Especially in New York City—it's such a transient city. People are coming, they're going, they're changing jobs, they're having families, they're moving to Brooklyn. There's always change in who our people are. It's been fun over the last year to try and identify that and not just give them what they want, but also try and tell them what we think they should want. It's striking that balance between things we know they'll love and things we think they should be following. It's a hard balance to strike, but it's also really fun.Maureen: And I know that this line of questioning could seem tangential to your personal style. But for me, it helps me really understand where you're coming from and how you could get to that place where fashion is a little bit less fun. Everything you're describing sounds very cool and also very corporate. There's a connection element to knowing what your customer likes, but also very business-oriented. Going back to what originally drew you to fashion being the actual clothes and the experience of clothing—those feel worlds apart. What do you think your day job in fashion is? What is the impact of that on how you personally dress, if anything?Jennifer: It's a huge impact. Less so in my current job, but previously—before becoming a buyer—I was working on the wholesale side of the business where I was representing individual brands. Every time I would represent a brand, I would kind of have to dress in that style. I would dress in their clothes pretty much head to toe. Part of that was due to the fact that I usually had a nice allowance or got a steep discount, so it made it easier to dress like that. One of the perks of the job for sure.But part of that was also—you feel like a representative of that brand. I always felt like I needed to dress the part in order to sell it better and do my job better. Now that I'm on the buying side, I have a wider breadth of options to choose from, which is great. But on the other hand, there's so much out there that I almost feel too inundated with products sometimes. I'm looking at all these amazing products from hundreds of brands and it can be decision fatigue and information overload. It's been a lesson in trying to pare back my own style and see what resonates with me. What do I actually feel good in? What do I want to wear that fits my life?I'm looking at all these amazing products from hundreds of brands and it can be decision fatigue and information overload. It's been a lesson in trying to pare back my own style and see what resonates with me. What do I actually feel good in? What do I want to wear that fits my life?Part of my Substack is talking about fashion and how it relates to the life I actually live. I'm a newish mom. I have a toddler. I live in Brooklyn. I'm on my feet all the time. I'm always running around. I'm also a yoga teacher. I'm writing. All of these things play into the way I want to dress. And that's not really what I'm selling in my store necessarily. I need my clothes to work for me. I need them to be washable and easy to wear. I need sneakers. I need really basic things. I live in Brooklyn. I have a small closet. I don't have space. How can I get the most out of my clothes?Sometimes I feel lucky to be able to buy things for the store that I can't buy for myself because they don't fit my lifestyle. It's still a nice way to work with younger brands and designers, get them out there, without having to take on—not that it's a burden—but that burden myself of owning their product. It all plays together for sure.On the other hand, I'm out in the market all the time and sometimes I see amazing pieces that I’m like, I don’t care if I’ll ever get use out of this. I have to have it.

Heads up! There’s no episode next week while I’m away on vacation, but we’ll be back on Friday, May 23 with the penultimate episode of the season, featuring Substack favorite Jennifer Cook of mom friend.We’ll wrap up Season One on Friday May 30 with the incredible Christine Platt. You might know her from Instagram or one of her many books, The Afrominimalist’s Guide to Living With Less. I can’t wait to share these final episodes with you! This week’s guest is Calley Dawson, the founder and CEO of circular fashion company, FXRY. We chat about her long tenure in fashion, how her approach to style has changed, and her take on what sustainable fashion even is. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I'm Maureen Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Calley Dawson, creator of the circular fashion startup FXRY. She's a fashion industry veteran who turned her focus to reducing fashion waste by scaling tailoring and mending services. Basically, she's super amazing. Calley, welcome to the show.Calley: Thanks, Maureen. Thanks for having me. I'm excited to be here.Maureen: Yeah, it's so nice to get to sit down and talk a little bit more. I know we talked a bit a couple weeks ago, which is always fun. I had a look at your FXRY website and I loved your quote about your experience in the fashion industry and how you realized that was contributing to the landfill—and now you're looking to reverse that. Just to personalize that moment even further, can you share what got you on the path of advocating for circularity?Calley: Sure. I've worked in the fashion industry for twenty-five years at all kinds of different big brands around the United States. It was really exciting when I was younger. I really enjoyed the fun of fashion, and even when fast fashion started, it was really fun to be a part of it. I don't know if I was young or not aware—whatever it was, I just had no idea that it was so bad for the planet. But it was a really fun space to be in because it was exploding. For you, Maureen, or anyone listening, it's really fun to work at a company and in a space that's doing well. It's not very fun to work somewhere that's not doing so well. It just doesn't feel good.The longer I went on working at these different companies and as I've gotten older and matured, I started to realize that the values I have for myself in my own personal life—I want them to align with my work. I don't even know if I knew what my values were when I was in my early twenties. When I really started this journey of doing fashion design, over the years I've come to realize that doing good by the planet and, honestly, just doing good is what feels best for me. I want to always be doing what is the better thing of two options. Nothing's perfect—everything we create has its flip side—but I just want to be marching towards what feels good.So for me, when I left the last company I was at and thought about what I wanted to do next, no company really excited me in fashion and apparel. I really didn’t want to lose the network and everything I had built up in my career. If I had switched into a different category—if I wanted to go do tech—I’d have to learn something fully new. I really wanted to utilize my skill sets and the network I’d built up.It was just really exciting to realize that I could align my values by doing something that was truly sustainable and not greenwashing. That was the other thing that was really hard to watch. I sat in these design director positions and had to advocate for my company while also helping people more junior on my team understand how this isn’t greenwashing. And in a lot of cases, accepting that that’s what we were doing, because most brands are overproducing—especially the big ones.Maureen: Yeah, and that’s really interesting what you said about going where feels right because this idea of intuitive style is, of course, about what we wear and choosing clothes that feel good. But there’s also an aspect of paying attention to what feels good in every aspect of our lives. I really appreciate what you're sharing about what felt right for you with your career.I'd love to hear a little bit more too. I like to make this comparison that intuition isn’t negating experience, nor is it negating expertise. So I'd love to hear a little bit more from your perspective about how your expertise in fashion led you to figuring out what felt right—versus just a gut feeling. You talked about not knowing your values earlier on. How did you develop that sense of your values and what you wanted to do at work?Calley: To be really honest, I think one of the biggest things for me is I'm sober. I live in a community of sober people where one of our tenets is to just do good and to make amends for bad things we've done in the past, or things that weren’t appropriate. That has really guided my life.When I was younger and newly sober, I didn’t know how to talk about that. I hid it a little bit. As I’ve gotten older and more comfortable in my own skin, I’m the first person to shout it from the rooftops. This is a part of my life and a big part of who I am. That’s really allowed me to set forth who I am and bring it into my career. I’ll be one of the first people at a company party to tell people I don’t drink. I’m sober. I’m comfortable with that.Allowing those parts of my personal life to be in my career and to lead with the values I’ve developed from there has been really important to me. I’d say it’s been an amazing experience learning how to manage people at work and realizing how different everyone is. Also realizing that the way things work is by collaboration and coming together. But the only way that you can come together—for example, to do circularity, because you can’t do it by yourself—it requires so many different people.It made me realize that we’re all so different, and the only way you get full collaboration is by fully understanding each other: why you’re different, how you’re different. So you have to be your authentic self, so that you can show other people who you are. It allows them to show you who they are, and then you can figure out the path forward. In this case, with sustainability and really figuring out how we can solve this massive overproduction problem. I know that’s a lot of things, but—Maureen: No, that's amazing. I appreciate everything you just shared. As an aside, I stopped drinking habitually, so I just want to connect with you in that way. I wouldn’t call myself sober in that sense, but I have made some very dramatic changes to my relationship with substances in general. It’s a learning process to figure out how to talk about it with people—if at all. Now that I’ve been doing this for a little while longer, I’m like, “Oh, everything about my life is different. I can tell people this because it’s important to who I am.”So I appreciate you sharing that because I think it’s really helpful for people to hear. Just not being ashamed, no matter how anyone might react. I’d love to talk a little more about FXRY and what you’re trying to do with it. I watched some of your social media videos and one thing that really stood out to me was a video showing a mending experience for a pair of stretchy jeans. That really connected with me as someone who wears stretchy pants.Stretchy jeans specifically—there are some very loud voices that are anti-stretch denim, and I think that’s totally great. If you’re a person who can wear non-stretch denim, please enjoy that. And for everyone else who does wear them, I just really appreciated seeing that there is a way to mend that kind of denim and keep it in use, rather than just saying, “Oh, we should never buy that kind of thing.” So I’d love to hear a bit more—not necessarily about that specifically—but about the FXRY approach and how that extends the life of clothing, perhaps compared to other circular fashion alternatives.Calley: Yeah, totally. You bring up a really great point that's talked about often in these circularity circles that I find myself in. There are definitely different camps, and then there are people who sort of reside in both. Some people are really strong that you should buy quality and therefore spend the money to maintain the quality. And some people are like, but I can't afford that. So I'm going to buy the cheaper option.I've definitely been in some conversations where someone said, we shouldn't fix the Zara stuff. And I’m like, no, we should fix everything—as long as we can fix it. If someone will wear it, we need to fix it. One of the biggest problems with waste is the plastic and the synthetics. Zara and other similar brands are the problem in the landfill. So however we can keep them going longer is important. At the same time, I would encourage people to think more about what they’re purchasing.From my personal experience, I used to be a crazy Zara shopper. I spent so much money there every month. I'd get this huge haul shipped to my house, go through it, send half of it back, and keep the rest. I’d wear it not for very long, and then I don’t even know what I did with it—probably donated it to Goodwill. Today, I haven’t bought anything from Zara for probably three years. One of my favorite shirts is from Zara, and I will wear that thing until it’s a rag.We definitely have people who come in or book online to repair fast fashion items, and they end up spending more than they originally paid. That works for them because they love the item. I would really encourage people to buy stuff they absolutely love. Don’t buy something just because it’s the trend of the moment. If you love the way it looks on you and how it makes you feel—which is what your podcast is all about—then it makes sense to buy it.We were actually contemplating whether to

Only a few more episodes in Season 1 of the podcast! Don’t missing upcoming conversations with Calley Dawson— founder of circular fashion brand FXRY, plus Jennifer Cook of mom friend, and one more surprise guest I can’t wait to reveal.Make sure you're subscribed—you won't want to miss the finale!Today’s guest is stylist, writer, and creative consultant Fanny Adams of Always Overdressed. We connect over losing touch with our preppy roots while in art school, plus Fanny provides a bit more detail on her concept of the ‘Emotional Support Outfit.’ This episode touches on some tender topics—grief, body changes, and navigating personal style through it all. If you're having a tough week, know that we go there—but we also find some lightness and laughter by the end. Enjoy.Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into that intuition so we can dress authentically and live fully.Today's guest is Fanny Adams, a stylist, writer, and creative consultant with nearly twenty years of experience in fashion. She's also an outfit repeater and the brains behind the Substack newsletter Always Overdressed. Fanny, welcome to the show.Fanny: Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here.Maureen: It's nice to sit down and talk together. For anyone who hasn’t had a chance to read your column yet, can you share what got you started writing on the platform?Fanny: It had been in the back of my mind for a few years, but what really prompted it wasn’t a happy reason. My dad died a year and a half ago. I not only lost my sense of self but also my sense of style. I had a lot of thoughts on grief—how it affects you inwardly and how it impacts your outward presentation.I had this essay in my head for a few months. I was also looking to go out on my own as a stylist, and Substack felt like a nice complement to building my brand. That essay, combined with launching my website, got me out there.Maureen: I'm genuinely sorry for your loss. How did the process of writing relate to your experience of grief?Fanny: I had the honor of writing my dad’s obituary. That was my first experience writing to process loss, and it was really sad but meaningful. Last summer, while quietly building my Substack page and thinking about my first post, I made a promise to myself: I would get dressed every day.Something as simple as putting on real clothes—not just sweats—became a way to work through grief. It gave me a small, manageable goal. Sometimes even the smallest tasks feel enormous when you’re struggling.I started putting on what I call my "emotional support outfits"—simple, comforting clothes. Then I started documenting them. Some friends encouraged me to post on TikTok, so I did, mostly to hold myself accountable.At night, I'd think about things I wanted to write about—not just grief, but other style topics. That’s how it all began.Maureen: I love that. Having a small goal like getting dressed can give you confidence to do other things. Is that how it felt?Fanny: Definitely. Getting dressed was the first step to getting the day started, then moving on to harder tasks. It also became a form of self-care.During the year after my dad’s death, I gained weight. So part of the process was giving myself grace—finding clothes that felt and looked good enough for where I was at.It helped me feel more presentable while also rediscovering pieces I loved. At one point, I realized, "I need new jeans." And that was okay. We’re allowed to gain or lose weight. Our bodies change all the time—monthly even.So I gave myself permission to buy things that fit. That made the experience much more enjoyable.Maureen: It can be hard to give ourselves permission to buy clothes that suit where we are now—especially when we’re trying to be mindful consumers. What did it change for you, having clothes that fit?Fanny: I learned not to immediately get rid of clothes when my size changes, but I’m still guilty of it. Giving yourself permission to buy clothes that fit your current body is self-care and self-acceptance. It’s about meeting yourself where you are.I’m a millennial. I grew up with specific body ideals, and I’ve worked really hard to unlearn them. But it’s tough when you’ve worked in fashion and retail. That pressure is everywhere. Why make it harder?At one point, I bought jeans from Zara. I wasn’t sure how long I’d be this size, and they were a good, affordable option. Honestly, I now swear by Zara jeans—they did what I needed them to do. They helped me stay on track with this daily dressing practice.Maureen: I saw you recently posted that you’d fallen off the dressing routine.Fanny: Yeah, I’ve slipped a bit. It’s just life—nothing traumatic, just busy.But last summer, those pieces really helped. They were a bridge. Over time, I’ve invested in higher-quality pieces that fit me now. But Zara jeans were the perfect in-between step. They helped rebuild my confidence.Maureen: I really resonate with that. We all define mindful shopping differently. For me, my size is changing constantly right now.My approach is to buy fewer items and wear them to death. That’s how I justify buying from places like Gap. I’ve tried more expensive, more ethical jeans, but they don’t fit the way I need—or they don’t carry my size.We don’t need to defend our choices. What works at one moment might change in another. Right now, I’m buying Gap jeans. Not too many. I’ll wear them as long as I can, and one pair will become shorts for summer.The reason I bring it up is because I’ve been feeling tender about some things I’ve read online—posts that unintentionally shame people for shopping certain brands.When we’re already carrying heavy emotions—like grief or major body changes—we don’t need to add shame on top of that.Fanny: Absolutely. I think there’s a lot of pressure put on consumers, and I don’t think it’s fair. It’s all about balance. Like, giving up plastic straws isn’t solving the environmental crisis, but it’s something I can do.The same goes for how we get dressed. “High-low dressing,” for lack of a more current term, is a realistic way to shop. I don’t think it’s feasible—even if you’re a gazillionaire—to wear only designer or fully sustainable brands.We all make trade-offs. I buy four Uniqlo t-shirts at a time. It’s not the most sustainable choice, and Uniqlo, while more responsible than other fast fashion brands, is still fast fashion. But those are the shirts that fit me best, and I wear them nearly every day.I’m not going to spend $95 on a sustainable t-shirt that doesn’t fit or hold up the way I need. As consumers, we need to: shop for what fits and feels good, and do the best we canWe’re part of the system, but we’re not the sole cause. Our wallets matter, sure, and it’s important to think about where we shop. But it's unrealistic to expect everyone to wear only organic, sustainable clothes—especially when you factor in size and price point.We need to be gentler with ourselves and each other, especially when we have a platform. We're already our own worst critics. Adding judgment from peers, writers, or creators only makes things worse.Maureen: I really appreciated your note on Substack about not feeling the joy of getting dressed right now. I related to that. Sometimes getting dressed is self-care, and sometimes it’s not. Sometimes, it’s the hardest part of the day.When we’re not distracted—when we’re alone in our room choosing an outfit—that’s when all the feelings we’ve been avoiding can bubble up. It’s not always about the clothes, but they can be the trigger.So hearing that from someone like you, who’s always overdressed and who works in fashion, helps bring balance. It’s a reminder that it’s okay to not always feel excited about getting dressed.Fanny: Thank you. Part of why I posted that was to let people know I hadn’t disappeared—I just wasn’t in the right headspace.I plan to write more about it this week. Going back to the idea of the emotional support outfit—some call it a uniform, but I think it’s either a step before or a step beyond. It’s a formula: something you can throw on without thinking too much, something that feels good enough.When my dad was sick, that outfit was jean shorts, a t-shirt, and Birkenstocks. I wasn’t working much—just helping my family and caring for my kids. That outfit made me feel comfortable and fine.Now that I’m consulting and meeting people in person again, I needed an updated version. I found that for me, it’s a button-up shirt, jeans or khakis, and loafers or ballet flats. That’s my current version of an emotional support outfit. I can throw on a sweater or a jacket, but those three pieces make me feel polished and comfortable.I’m literally wearing it right now—button-up shirt, jeans, and Birkenstocks since I’m at home. It helps me feel confident and presentable, even when clothes aren’t my focus.We all need to know the combination of items that helps us feel good enough to move through the day—whether we’re parenting, working, or just getting through it. We want to feel great, but that’s not always realistic.These past two weeks, I found myself repeating the same shirts because it worked. I was seeing different people each day, so no one noticed. But it made me not want to take outfit pictures—it was basically the same look over and over.Still, it was good to have that fallback formula. It kept me moving forward even when the joy of getting dressed wasn't there. And I still felt good leaving the house. It wasn’t exciting, but it worked.It’s like how Obama wore the same suit-and-tie combo daily—it reduced decision fatigue. There are times when, even if you love clothes, they can’t be your top priority. Having an emotional support outfit takes away the shame of not feeling your best.You can still do the things you need to do—school drop-offs, work meetings—and feel pretty good about yoursel

Did you know new episodes of Intuitive Style drop weekly on Fridays? Subscribe so you don’t miss Fanny Adams, Jennifer Cook and more special guests in upcoming weeks!Today's guest is Sienna Reid, writer of the Substack column The Bronze Edit. I am both so inspired by her very cool personal style AND the way she writes about the experience of getting dressed. I so enjoyed connecting with her. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I'm Maureen Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Sienna Reid from The Bronze Edit. In her newsletter, Sienna chronicles her experience figuring out her personal style in her 30s. As a fellow wide pants lover, she pulls the best inspiration images and eloquently analyzes how getting dressed feels. Sienna, welcome to the show.Sienna: Thank you so much, Maureen. I'm so happy to be here.Maureen: We've been having internet conversations for a while, so it's nice to actually see your face and talk to you. One of my favorite posts of yours is about the outfits you're too afraid to wear. I love how you bring awareness to that feeling—when you're excited to wear something authentic, you have all the right pieces, but it just doesn't feel quite right once it's on. You end up changing into something else. Could you share more about that post and what initially drew you to those outfits?Sienna: Yes, absolutely. That post came from a moment when I was getting dressed for my niece’s birthday party. I don’t have kids, so I was already feeling a little unsure about what to wear to something like that. I wanted to feel like myself but still fit in. I put together an outfit with a floral dress layered under a sweater and over jeans—pieces I’ve owned for years. I loved how it looked in the mirror. But the moment I thought about walking out the door, a flood of insecurity hit me. What will people think? Will I be taken seriously? Which is wild because it's a toddler’s birthday party. But the voice of doubt was loud. And that’s what made me write that post. I realized I already owned my dream wardrobe, but I didn’t always have the confidence to wear it. And the response to the post made me realize so many people feel the same way. That alone gave me the push to actually wear one of those outfits out.Maureen: Do you think it was sharing that post online that changed how you felt about those outfits?Sienna: I think it helped, yes. I wasn’t posting it to get validation, but seeing how many people resonated with the experience reminded me that people aren’t scrutinizing me the way I imagine. That realization helped ground me. It’s not that the outfit is wrong—it’s just fear. If I want to show up in a way that feels true to me, I have to push past that fear. And it's not easy. I’ve only worn one of the outfits from that post, but it’s a start.Maureen: I have a theory I’d love to hear your take on. Do you think we’re drawn to these outfits because they’re more expressive or editorial, which makes them harder to wear? Like we’re asserting something about ourselves that feels bold or different from what’s around us?Sienna: I think you're really hitting the nail on the head because I think most of us here do love fashion or style or something about getting dressed. Otherwise, I think we wouldn't be here. But then it is scary to go out into that real world and, and kind of say to the world, yes, I actually am interested in this, or this is something that I actually enjoy doing. It's kind of really putting yourself out there because. If you go out and people think, oh, she put no effort into her outfit, then I don't care if they judge me, right? But it's scarier if they think, she tried and came up with that?But it's scarier if they think, she tried and came up with that?I think the other piece is, there's something about to like, when I'm alone in my room, and I think about outfits I love, I do like when they're different. And I do like when they stand out. But then That is also really hard because in the, you know, in my real life, I'm a pretty introverted person. Like I don't love a lot of attention. So it's tough.Maureen: This is a really big question, but what are you afraid of? I'm asking myself too, right? I think you, you got pretty close with the idea of It's, it's harder when I've actually tried. It's more vulnerable than when I didn't try. Maybe that's why everyone's so obsessed with looking effortless?Sienna: That's actually such a good point. Yeah. I do think that is a huge part of it. Like I even think about, you know, other things in, in my life, like whether it's career or sports or things like that. It's kind of like when you're just starting out and there's no. Expectation that you should be good at it. It's okay if you fail, but. It's like if once you go farther and you've put in that work to get better, if you still fail, that's a lot harder to deal with.Maureen: I'd love to transition then to talking about the Bronze Edit. I feel some pressure as someone writing about style online, I feel like I should be pushing myself a little bit further, be a little bit more expressive or, I should be trying a little bit harder. Is that something that crosses your mind ever with The Bronze Edit?Sienna: That's a really good question. I think a couple of things. I think the one next almost negative that I've noticed is that—and I really fight this—I repeat the same outfits a lot. I have a couple of sweaters, a couple of pairs of jeans that without fail, I will wear every week. Maybe I wear like a different belt, but it's basically the same outfit. And I think there is sometimes this sense of guilt that I feel when I post the same thing over and over again, even though that's so normal in real life. It's almost like, okay, is this super boring for people? Because I literally wore this outfit last week and the week before and the week before. I consciously don't let me stop, like stop me from wearing those outfits because I love them, they're comfortable. I'm just gonna wear them. A very positive thing that has come out of it is that It's sort of giving me more confidence to try new things. I'm not at a point where I feel pressure to try and be more experimental. I have found it's actually been kind of a, a positive, um, effect to sort of say like, yes, you can try new things. If it doesn't work out, then that's probably a really fun thing to write about as well. It's been just such a natural organic thing. And I think you had posted something recently about like sort of the difference between Instagram and Substack. I don't think I will ever be someone who is regularly posting on Instagram. I just don't think that could work for me and my personality. That would be a lot of pressure to be coming up with these super cool outfits all the time. Whereas with Substack, if my outfits are boring, then I can write about how my outfits are boring and work through things that way.I don't think I will ever be someone who is regularly posting on Instagram. I just don't think that could work for me and my personality. That would be a lot of pressure to be coming up with these super cool outfits all the time. Whereas with Substack, if my outfits are boring, then I can write about how my outfits are boring and work through things that way.Maureen: Yeah, I would love to talk about this more because I had this thought the other day and I want to make the disclaimer that I think that Substack is a social media platform just like any other. The thing that I like about Substack is that there is long form content and so inherently that means that we aren't trying to make every little thing a sound bite that you can just digest in like a second. The process of trying to write my little Instagram bio was an absolute headache because everything that I write is really nuanced. And I can say something that can be completely contradictory to something else, and I hold space for both. A lot of writers on Substack do that and that's the benefit of a long form narrative is that you can actually get into the meat of something.Maybe that's why I like YouTube so much too — you can go so much deeper with long-form. Then on Instagram, I tried to promote this podcast, which doesn’t come naturally to me. Instead of putting up clips, I thought I had to make videos of myself putting on clothes.And I didn’t like it. It’s not what I want to do, so I only made two videos. But I had a moment where I thought, “Why am I trying to sell my personal identity and style?” That’s not what I do on Substack. I don’t know how you feel about that, because your platform is very much about your personal style, but it’s more nuanced. It’s about the experience.Sienna: Yeah, I think that’s true. For me, it’s rarely about the outfit or even the clothes themselves. Half the time, I forget to link what I’m wearing and then think, “Okay, maybe that’s annoying,” but it’s never really about saying, “Here’s a cool outfit I put together, you should copy it.” It’s about how I got there, how I felt. Honestly, half the time I’m just working through things in real time as I write — writing helps me process. That’s so different from Instagram, where it’s more about the visual — do I like the outfit or not? And that’s fine; I love using Instagram for inspiration. But for me, personally, I don’t think I could handle the pressure. It doesn’t fit my personality, and that’s okay. It’s not a moral judgment. It’s just not what I’m trying to do.Maureen: I love everything you just said. One thing I enjoy about going back to Instagram is seeing so many outfits I haven’t seen elsewhere — not on Pinterest or Substack. There’s so much diversity in bodies and personal styles, which can be overwhelming, but also really refreshing.Your posts have some of the best inspi

This week’s guest is Talía Cu, writer of Latin Zine by Talía Cu and veteran fashion journalist. She’s focused on introducing the world to cool designers and pieces with soul, sourced from the diverse cultures within Latin America. In our episode, we cover everything from her perspective on Latin American fashion’s influence on the global style scene, to how she personally decides what to buy and wear. Enjoy! Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Talía Cu, writer of Latin Zine. Talia is a Mexican fashion journalist who has worked for esteemed publications including Vogue Mexico and Latin America. As a fashion illustrator for luxury brands like Fendi and Bumble, she is currently a cool hunter of Latin American brands. Her Substack newsletter showcases her exquisite eye for emerging talent, hidden gems, and one-of-a-kind artisanal fashion. Talia, welcome to the show.Talía: Thank you, I'm really excited because it's my first podcast interview in English.Maureen: I'm sure it's going to be fantastic. Thank you for trusting me with this process. I'm excited to talk with you and learn more about you, your experience, and your personal style. For anyone who hasn't interacted with Latin Zine yet, would you share a bit more about your column?Talía: Of course. Latin Zine by Talía Cu is a newsletter dedicated to understanding fashion from a Latin American perspective. It's a place to discover new fashion stories and hidden gems—brands you don't typically see in mainstream media.Maureen: I love that your work introduces us to new brands. Many people are interested in connecting to style on a personal level. Could you speak more to the global impact of Latin American brands? How is Latin American fashion shaping global style trends?Talía: I wrote about this in the beginning of my newsletter. I don’t like to generalize Latin America because each country is so different. Designers often have to compensate for things like lack of materials, so they create amazing work with what's available. The whole region has a wonderful creative spirit. Globally, there's growing appreciation for artisanal pieces and sustainable practices, and Latin America is at the forefront of that.Maureen: I was hoping to talk more about sustainability. You write about fashion discovery, which can lead to shopping. But how do we appreciate and engage with fashion without overconsuming?Talía: That’s a big reason I created the newsletter. I found so many beautiful things and wanted to collect them somewhere. I do write about shopping, but I also share designers’ stories so there's more context to what you’re purchasing. I like to buy directly from designers or brands I've followed for a while and believe in their methods or practices. I usually don’t buy on impulse. I think carefully and sometimes wait for the right piece that resonates with me. I’m also building a small archive of Latin American designers—pieces I may not wear daily but that are meaningful or significant.Maureen: Even though your column isn’t personal style, or would you describe it that way?Talía: Not exactly, but I do look at Latin American fashion from my own point of view. It’s about the people I meet, the things that catch my eye, and what I discover. I've been covering Latin American fashion for years, but I’m always finding new designers and stories, and I share them as I go.Maureen: I love the way you balance discovery and perspective without it becoming strictly personal style. There's a clear intentionality and playfulness to your work. Let’s talk a bit about your own personal style. I'm interested in why people wear what they wear—how do you decide what to buy and wear, especially since you’re constantly seeing cool brands?Talía: Everything for me is intuitive. When I go into a shop, something needs to grab my attention—maybe it’s a color or pattern. I also care about the stories behind the pieces. Like, if I know a brand has an interesting upcycling process, I want something from them. One of my favorite things is when someone compliments a piece and I get to tell them it’s from a Costa Rican designer who upcycles leather. Fashion becomes a conversation.Maureen: That’s beautiful. Your clothing becomes a part of your story and a way to engage with others.Talía: Yes, I love talking about it.Maureen: Okay, this is something I struggle with. There's a brand called Wray NYC that’s size-inclusive and editorial, and they’re going out of business. My first instinct was to buy everything. How do you handle moments like that—when you want to support a brand but also make sure what you buy is actually useful or wearable?Talía: I’d say I have two categories: pieces I wear daily and curated archive pieces I only wear on special occasions. For daily wear, I buy things like printed mesh tops from Colombian brands that I wear often. I try to balance both—special pieces and practical items.Maureen: That’s a cool way to approach shopping. I always feel like something has to be utilitarian for me to want to buy it. But fashion can also be conceptual or artistic.Talía: Exactly.Maureen: Let’s talk about how body awareness influences the way you dress. Are there certain textures, fits, or styles you gravitate toward based on how they make you feel?Talía: Yes, especially as a woman with a larger chest, I notice many Latin American designers don’t make tops that fit me well. The models they show often have smaller chests, and I wonder how the clothes would actually look on me. That’s why I don’t love shopping online—I need to try things on. I also have PCOS, and for a while, my weight was fluctuating, which made me more self-aware. During that time, I started wearing more pastels. I think it made me feel soft and loving toward myself.I also have PCOS, and for a while, my weight was fluctuating, which made me more self-aware. During that time, I started wearing more pastels. I think it made me feel soft and loving toward myself.Maureen: That’s really beautiful. I've gone through body changes too, and it’s true—our relationship with clothing can shift with our relationship to our bodies. Some silhouettes I used to love just don’t work for me anymore, and that’s okay.Talía: Yes, I'm 35, and I’ve been thinking about how many independent designers seem to focus more on people in their twenties. I love what they create, but sometimes I see things like mini skirts and wonder—can I still wear that? Even if it’s not super short, I still question if I’ve passed the age for it, or if I’m just overthinking. I don’t feel as comfortable in those pieces as I did in my twenties, and I’m still processing what that means for me.Maureen: Can I ask—have you tried one on?Talía: Yes.Maureen: How did you feel?Talía: I felt a bit uncomfortable. I kept wondering if I was showing too much leg.Maureen: I totally get that. I’m all about self-compassion, so if that’s how you feel, that’s okay. You don’t need to rush into anything. I’ve been thinking about this too. I’m almost 30, so I feel like I could still get away with a mini skirt, but I’m married and live in the suburbs, and the idea just doesn’t appeal to me. I’d rather wear shorts—they’re more comfortable, and I don’t have to worry about anything riding up or flashing someone. But I think if wearing one feels authentic to you, go for it. And if it doesn’t, that’s okay too.Talía: Exactly. That’s true.Maureen: That’s where I’m at with it.Talía: I’d love to wear tights underneath, but it’s so warm where I live, so that’s not really an option. Maybe wearing shorts underneath would make me feel more comfortable. I hadn’t thought of that.Maureen: Yeah, I think a little bike short could help.Talía: Yeah, maybe.Maureen: Let’s go back to your style evolution. Have you had any memorable phases?Talía: When I was 19, I was obsessed with collecting earrings. There was a shop in my hometown that sold beads from around the world, and I was constantly buying jewelry. Then I went through a phase of buying weird tights online from UK brands—like ones with tattoo prints. In my early 20s, I wore a lot of pink and fuchsia, but a boy I liked told me it looked childish, so I switched to wearing black. I’m sad I let that influence me. Now, I’m really into rings, brooches, and necklaces. My hair also affects my style—since changing it recently, some things don’t look the same on me.Maureen: Yeah, for people listening, how would you describe your current hairstyle? It’s very cool.Talía: It's like half blonde and half copper.Maureen: And what was your most recent hairstyle before this?Talía: I tried a bit of pink with brunette. I've always had really dark eyebrows, that's my natural color. I started with a little pink and then decided I wanted something completely different. This is probably the most drastic change I’ve had.Maureen: I love that. As you said earlier, when I asked how you decide what to buy or wear, it sounds like you have such an intuitive approach. You're in your heart rather than your head when making choices. As someone super analytical, I tend to overthink everything. How do you stay light and in tune with yourself when shopping or deciding on hair and accessories?Talía: I wouldn’t say it’s always practical. My best friend gets texts from me at least once a month saying I don’t have anything to wear with something I just bought. She always says, “You need a leather jacket.” I do buy basics for function, but I’m not great with practicality.Maureen: So you're more of a magpie—you go for color, print, and shiny pieces.Talía: Yes. I’m very selective with what I buy and like, but then I have to think about the practical side. There’s a Mexican brand that sells basics like jeans and tank tops. I go to them when I need staples. But u

Did you know new episodes of Intuitive Style drop weekly on Fridays? Subscribe so you don’t miss Fanny Adams, Jennifer Cook and more special guests in upcoming weeks!Today’s guest is Emily Grady Dodge, writer of Just For Fun. Emily shares exactly how she found THE pants that made the rest of her wardrobe come together, how she finds contentment with her clothes, and her number one tip for anyone struggling with their style. Even though this was our first time meeting, I felt like we’ve known each other all along. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. I’m Maureen Welton. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Emily Grady-Dodge from Just For Fun. She shares about her capsule wardrobe, asks the question, what are you wearing? And shares about how she is generally satisfied with less but better. We love her minimal aesthetic, dry humor, and real life realness. Emily, welcome to the pod.Emily: Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited.Maureen: I'm so happy to meet you. I know that we've virtually met through our writing, but it's nice to actually hear your voice and get to know you a little better.Emily: Oh, thank you.Maureen: For anyone who hasn't read your Substack column yet, can you describe what Just For Fun is all about?Emily: Yeah, so I started it a little over a year ago and did not think I would be writing about fashion at all. I thought it would just be more general like lifestyle and motherhood. About two weeks after I wrote the first post, I, for totally separate reasons, decided to jump on the Rule of Five challenge. And then my whole life just sort of funneled itself into caring a lot about clothing again.Naturally, my Substack just followed suit and I started writing about that. I was having a fun time writing about what I'm wearing, what I was planning on buying, because it was such a limited shopping year for me that everything felt really high stakes. I took every purchase very seriously—except for one, which I did very candidly write about. Just For Fun kind of naturally evolved to be this place where, literally, it's the title. It is just for fun. I'm not trying to make a career out of it. It's an outlet for me. It's something creative to do in my spare time. I do it from my phone. It's very low stakes, but I've had the best time connecting with people in this sort of niche community of like-minded individuals. We’re trying to figure out what we’re wearing to work, to date nights, to the mall with friends. How are we making choices that feel good and that we’re not regretting two months later? That was always a problem for me in the past. But anyway, long story short, Just For Fun is really about what I'm buying, what I’m really wearing—I’m super honest, big outfit repeater. I love outfit repeating. It's not something to be ashamed about. I just lay it all out there, and it's been interesting. It's very cathartic.Maureen: Yeah, I love that. It’s really fun to read your posts, and I always love your outfit pictures too. They always look really polished, but at the same time, they feel very real. Your descriptions go into the things you might not see in the image. For anyone who isn't familiar with the Rule of Five, could you share a little bit about what that is and why you were drawn to it?Emily: Yeah, so admittedly, I've never been very driven by sustainability. It's just not something that I feel overly concerned about mainly because I do have like a very naturally small footprint life like Uh, I moved to Jersey city from Brooklyn a few years ago, but I didn't have a car for fifteen years. I do. We do have one car now. Um, we live in an apartment. I have a really small closet with very limited space and just kind of naturally have to have a small wardrobe. Um, so my life choices were never driven by any like, oh, I really, really want to be sustainable. They just happened to be in line with that. Rule of five is very much rooted in sustainability. It came about from a study that said, if you're in this income bracket, you need to slow your roll. People who, in this bracket, if they shifted to only buying five items of clothing a year, we would fix this massive landfill problem that we have with clothing being thrown out at this record pace. And all of the ripple effects that are terrible for the environment because of that. That is not why I jumped on the rule of five bandwagon. I wish I could say that it was. But it wasn't. I think it's great that it exists for that. But for me, it was like, okay, I just finished the year 2023 of shopping. I kept track of all my purchases. I bought, I think, forty-seven things. By the end of the year, I was already selling half of it on Poshmark or the RealReal or donating it because I didn't even have the bandwidth to resell it. And just really questioning, like, what am I doing? Why do I keep making these terrible choices that even two days later after taking the price tag off, I'm like, did I have amnesia? Why did I buy that? What was going on in my head? Like, this doesn't make sense. So I saw the framework of buy five things new in one year. Renting is okay. Up to four items of secondhand clothing. And that all just felt like really safe to me. I needed somebody else to give me that boundary and to commit myself to it. When I commit to something, I am like a dog with a bone. I knew that I would do it. Like I knew I would stay the course.Trying [Rule of Five] really changed everything for me. It was such a year of pausing, of reflecting, of figuring out this root cause of why I kept making terrible choices. Um, and how to, I don't think you can ever be perfect or ever completely stop that from happening, but like how to have a better success rate with shopping moving forward. Um, and it was really, really huge for me and I loved writing about it and I loved, um, kind of that safety net when the year ended, I was a little. A little nervous, but also I felt like I was in such a good place, um, in my own head about what I wanted, what my gaps were. What vibe I want out of my wardrobe, how I want to feel when I'm wearing clothes, um, what length pants feel good, um, just all of these things that back in 2023, I was floundering and just grasping at straws and it wasn't working.There's a great Substack called Rule of Five by the woman who sort of outlined this whole idea. Her name's Tiffanie Darke. I highly recommend checking that out. My reasons of approaching it were a little different than the intent, I think.Maureen: That's so profound though, that idea that there's an intrinsic benefit to consuming less, or there can be.Emily: Right.Maureen: Personally, I would love to see people consuming less and be happy with fewer things because that is sustainable, but I love when we can exemplify that wanting less and being satisfied with less isn't a bad thing and it's actually freeing and helpful. And fun in its own way. Maybe could you speak a little bit more to how—or any moments in time when you realized like, oh, this is really good for me? This is really helping my style or helping me decide what I actually want?Emily: Yeah, this is gonna sound a little woo-woo, but bear with me. A few years ago, I saw someone and I loved her outfit, and I had this epiphany where I felt like this woman was 100% operating from a place of 'I am beautiful.' I could tell that the way she was dressed, she felt that way about herself. At that time in my life, I was postpartum, none of my clothes fit, I had a small wardrobe but didn’t love what I had. It struck me that I was not making purchases from a place of believing anything positive about myself. If you don't see yourself in a positive light, any clothing purchase is just a Band-Aid on a bullet wound. Like it's not going to get the job done and you're just scrambling for something that's going to make you feel better. But that is not what's going to make you feel better. The answer is not in clothing. When I had this moment of seeing this woman, and just the way she carried herself and what she was wearing. I thought I really need to work on myself and I'm not going to let myself shop until I believe I'm beautiful and worthy of having a wardrobe that reflects that. And that was hard for me at first. Like I was like, oof, like that feels big. That feels scary. That feels like, no, let me just keep shopping at J.Crew when they have a 40% off sale. I got to this place where I was like, if I believed I was beautiful, what would I buy? And it was a really different answer than what I was just kind of being drawn to buying without doing that train of thought. And I bought this pair of pants, and I wrote about this when I did a recent post about workwear. I bought this pair of pants on the RealReal, and when I put them on, I was like, holy, can I swear?If I believed I was beautiful, what would I buy?Maureen: Yeah, go for it.Emily: I was like, holy s**t. Like, where have these pants been all my life? I put them on and I was like, bury me in these pants. This is how I wanna feel all the time. This is my new metric. If what I’m putting on doesn’t make me feel like this, then I’m not putting it on. So if that means wearing the same outfit to every single work function, that’s what I’m going to do. Honestly, I did that. Like, I was wearing the same... I’ve worn the same pair of pants to everything. It’s crazy. And my boss, who has a very good eye for design, will be like, oh, I love those pants. And I just laughed at myself because I’m like, I’ve worn them five times in the last five times. You also told me that you loved them. Um, but I just had this epiphany with these pants. They had a really interesting cut. Um, not anything that I had worn before. I felt like they were really flattering. They were really c

Sushmita and I cover the identity politics of slow fashion, unequal access to ethically made clothing, and how Sushmita is ready to be gentler with herself.Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe everyone has style. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully.Today's guest, Sushmita , is the writer and artist behind Ethical Fat Fashion . She's well known for her size-inclusive ethical fashion brand directory, zines, and fashion/political commentary.Welcome to the show, Sushmita!Sushmita: Thanks, Maureen. It's so nice!Maureen: Yay! Yes, I'm so happy that you decided to come on.To kick things off, I love the mission behind your newsletter, Ethical Fat Fashion. For anyone unfamiliar, can you share what EFF is all about?Sushmita: Yeah, of course. I mean, it's been a few years, and I'm still figuring it out, but Ethical Fat Fashion started off as a brand directory. This was 2021, 2022. I was sourcing size-inclusive and size-diverse brands—brands that started from a 2X or a US 20. From there, I switched to Patreon and started making digital zines, exploring a whole host of different issues. I was talking about body image, movie reviews—anything and everything I wanted to put in there, I did.That eventually brought me to Substack last year. I wanted something more frequent. The zines were seasonal, but now I post every single week, and the content changes all the time. The thread running through it is the idea of ethical fashion, but I’m looking at it from different angles—especially how our bodies and fashion connect, including how we view ourselves and how that affects how we dress.Maureen: Yeah, absolutely. I think it’s so true. And I certainly experience this as a writer on Substack myself—it can be hard to pin down into one thing. But that can also be the fun of it!We're allowed to explore different aspects of who we are and of a particular topic, and I think you manage that really well.In one of your more recent posts, you compared slow fashion to diet culture (aware of Virginia Sole-Smith), which really resonated with me—especially how you acknowledge the reality that participating in slow fashion has been elevated to a high moral status while simultaneously excluding so many people, particularly fat people.What compelled you to write this post at this time?Sushmita: These are really scary posts to put on the internet—especially in leftist spaces, where everybody is aiming for this moral purity. If you add any kind of complexity, you can become a target.I was scared to write about it, but I think Substack allows for long-form content rather than just 140 characters or less. It lets us balance perspectives.Hopefully, I was able to separate the idea of fashion justice from what we see as "sustainability" or "slow fashion" as a brand or an identity—because those are two very different things.Fashion justice is about better conditions for garment workers and ensuring they have living wages. I don’t think anyone is against that. I really don’t. But the means to achieve that—the current slow fashion or ethical fashion movement—has such a heavy focus on consumerism. It’s become identity-focused rather than actually looking at how we can achieve that outcome.I wrote this post after a series of revelations over the last couple of years. I started to feel more separated from the narratives that kept being repeated on the internet.One of the big shifts for me was material envy, which I talk about a lot. I saw someone very prominent in the space admit how much they owned, and I realized I owned maybe a quarter of that. The difference between our wardrobes was startling, and I had this feeling inside me—why can’t I have that abundance? Why am I not deserving of beautiful clothes?Another shift was recognizing the difference between identity and outcome. We're not really having conversations about how we can help garment workers. And I include myself in this—we, as consumers, have taken over the conversation. It’s almost a saviorism narrative: We in the Global North are going to help these poor garment workers.Maureen: Yeah, yeah.Sushmita: But the reality is that garment workers are already trying their absolute hardest to advocate for themselves. That’s why trade unions exist.Many of them are dealing with governments that, even if they have laws in place to protect workers—especially women—those laws aren’t effective. Sexual harassment in factories is a huge issue, and we, as consumers, cannot fix that just by buying differently. We are not in the factories. We cannot protect these workers simply through buying differently.Maureen: I'm getting chills.Sushmita: Yeah.Maureen: I so agree. I did not mean to cut you off, though!Sushmita: No, no, it’s totally fine. It’s a conversation! But a lot of these things I haven’t said out loud before, so I’m still forming these thoughts as I speak.I just feel like we’ve created this belief that we can buy our way into saving garment workers. And I don’t connect with that narrative anymore. Instead, I’m thinking about what actions we can take beyond consumerism to support garment workers.One thing that’s been on my mind is that, due to the new [United States] administration, one of the key trade alliances in Bangladesh, Awaj Foundation, lost 20 to 30% of their funding. We could directly give them money.That would be more powerful than tweeting or posting online, shaming other people about their consumerism.Maureen: Oh my gosh. Yes. Yes.We’re so aligned, and this is part of the reason I wanted to have you on the show right now.I’ve been a consumer of slow fashion content for a long time, and I think the early voices in this space raised important issues. They brought awareness to things people didn’t know about.And to their credit, a lot of work has gone into that awareness—helping us be more conscious of what we buy and why.But I also think it’s gone too far, to your point. It’s become about identity rather than outcome.I would love to hear you talk more about the identity of being a "slow fashion person." Why do you think that has resonated so much with creators?Sushmita: I think it follows what we already see in leftist spaces, where our identities become the whole of us.For me, the biggest issue is this all-or-nothing thinking. Either you’re buying ethically, or you’re not. Either you’re a "reformed shopper," or you’re not. There’s no in-between.I struggled with my own consumerism because I couldn’t afford the things I wanted to buy, and I didn’t give myself any grace.I had spent years building a platform against fast fashion, and unfortunately, the majority of the fashion industry—99% of it—still operates with fast fashion tactics. Maybe not at the same production scale, but there’s still a lot of opaqueness.It’s really difficult to be a responsible consumer.And I wouldn’t allow myself to step outside of those boundaries. I had all these limitations. I still have these limitations.But I was so scared of tarnishing my identity as someone who promotes ethical fashion.And yet, the whole concept of ethical fashion is actually very, very complicated. People want you to believe that being a responsible consumer is so damn easy. It's just about, you know, choosing the right brand. And now that I've been in this space for a really long time, I’ve been contacting brands that claim to be size diverse or care about inclusivity or sustainability.There are brands that use socially audited factories and have longstanding relationships with their factories, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they pay living wages. There are small businesses that have zero relationship to their makers. I’ve reached out to them, and they’ll be like, “No, we have no idea which factory we produce at.”And there's just so much ethics-washing. There's small-business-washing as well. There are brands that are obviously a lot larger than they make themselves out to be. And it's absolutely impossible to always make the right decision when businesses themselves are not being transparent with consumers. A lot of these businesses actually say that they’re ethical or sustainable, but nobody really wants to talk about that aspect.So not only is it difficult to be responsible when it comes to not buying from 99% of fashion, but it's also difficult when you are only buying from ethical brands because ethical is not regulated.Maureen: Right. It's like the word "organic" in the United States. What does organic mean? Okay, well, organic means that it’s made out of earth-created materials. [But] organic does not mean that you don’t use pesticides. So there’s this kind of—perhaps purposeful—opaqueness around what a term means, then you don’t have to define it and you don’t have to have restrictions to work within.I also wanted to go back and validate something you said earlier, which was that writing that post was vulnerable and difficult, and I completely relate to that. I put up a post, I think around the same time that you did—like, I think it was the same week. We were just on the same wavelength.Oh no, I responded to yours. I'm so sorry. I responded to yours.Anyway, I put up a post like, There’s this narrative that it’s easy to shop ethically, and yet the reality is very far from that for so many people. Again, going back to this idea of an identity rather than an outcome.I started looking into the data around fast fashion. People say, Consumers buy sixty-eight items of clothing every year. I can’t find the statistic or the background for that. There are so many things that impact our carbon footprint to begin with. And I know the term ethical doesn’t just mean sustainability—it doesn’t just encompass green practices—but when it is coming from a sustainability perspective, there’s this idea that not buying new clothing has this tremendous impact on your carbon footprin

Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Tina from Semi-Sustainable. Tina is a fashion industry veteran who is about to graduate with her MBA. You know her from her nuanced takes on what it means to shop and dress sustainably and her gorgeous fashion week roundups. Tina, welcome to the show.TinaI am so excited to be here. Thank you so much for having me. And can I say I have loved all of your past episodes. You've made my Fridays so much more exciting.MaureenOh, I'm so happy to hear that. It's been so fun to make and just a quick shout out to all the guests who have made it possible!I'm so happy to talk today. I know we've had a chance to connect a little bit beforehand, so I'm just happy to hear even more from you about your personal style. For anyone who hasn't had a chance to read your column yet, can you describe what Semi-Sustainable is all about and how you got into the sustainable fashion world, specifically?TinaTotally. You know, I'll even work my way backwards to that question. So I have always worked in traditional fashion. I started as an omni-channel jewelry and accessories buyer, which is where my heart loves is categories to buy. And then I moved into apparel. And as e-commerce was heating up, I was given this opportunity to work in buying and site merchandising on the online side of the business. And I really loved that. But during that time, I never quite absorbed fashion's impact on the planet. So when I was starting out, the emphasis was on high-low dressing and being a smart shopper meant you bought from fast fashion. You bought something from a designer and you had this well-rounded wardrobe. And it was in 2018 that I went to a panel talk given by Mara Hoffman's team, and they talked about how they really transform their supply chain to be more sustainable. And they went into great detail about how fashion harms the planet and what they were doing to really take away some of that impact. It was so eye-opening for me. And after that, I kind of started down this pathway of making changes in my fashion consumption. So it was not overnight by any means, but you know, at the time I was a big Zara shopper and I really worked to slow that down and put more thought into how much I was buying. And for me, what worked in my favor, I was on the earlier side of shopping the RealReal. I've been shopping there for eleven years now. You know, first because, and then I could afford all the designer pieces that I would have loved to have in my budget. And then over time it, because it was more circular and I've shifted a lot of my purchasing to secondhand. Over the last five or six years. I was on the earlier side of shopping the RealReal. I've been shopping there for eleven years now. I could afford all the designer pieces that I would have loved to have in my budget.Then for Semi-Sustainable, I started it last fall as my innovation project. For my MBA program and we were able to get approval to work on anything that would really help grow or advance our careers. And I know I would love to work and some kind of sustainable arm of the fashion industry, especially if there's a tech component in there. So, you know, as far as Substack, I had subscribed to newsletters here and there over the last few years, but I really thought they were more of the silo of newsletters and I didn't realize there was this whole fashion Substack universe. And when I got into it, I was hooked. So I started Semi Sustainable as a way to talk about a subject that I love, but also ways we can be more responsible in our consumption. So for me, that's mostly buying secondhand and not new or what I like to call firsthand. And, you know, I don't think fashion and sustainability are these mutually exclusive concepts. You look at brands like Ganni, for example, and you can see it's possible to do or be both.MaureenYeah, I love that. Can you speak a little bit more about, you know, why semi-sustainable rather than fully sustainable, for example?TinaI love to say that I could never call this like fully sustainable because it's almost impossible in today's world. If you buy something new, you're manufacturing a new product made out of new materials. It's impacting the planet. So. You can take ways to make it a little more sustainable in your life, whether it's buying secondhand, reducing your consumption, or even outside of fashion. I try to think of ways I can try to reduce my consumption. What kills me is plastic. I have done a lot of research into plastic for my MBA program. So I'm always the person trying to. Find ways to actually recycle my beauty empties through Sephora or take my plastic packaging back to the grocery store in the hopes that it might be made more circular. So just trying to take those steps, knowing that unless you probably never buy anything again, you'll never be a very fully sustainable person.MaureenI love that nuance. I mean, yeah, I think just bringing that nuance and that understanding that full sustainability isn't really even realistic. I resonate with that so much, and Intuitive Style is about is letting go of perfectionism and just seeing those places where perfectionism isn't even possible. I did want to go back a little bit to that talk by Mara Hoffman. I know that was a while ago, but is there anything that comes to mind that like you remember from that talk that just like really struck you as, ‘sustainability is important and it's possible?’TinaYou know, I think where they were talking a lot is some things that I knew a little bit more because of my fashion background. So they talked about how they changed their printing processes to use less water or how they'd work with their manufacturing teams to. Have less fabric wasted wastage and that really resonated with me since as a buyer I was working a lot with production team or factories and it makes you realize how much all the things you make as decisions as a buyer add up. to impact the planet. So, I think for me, like having both the fashion background and then being a little interested in sustainability at the time really worked together to make me realize, whoa, there's, there's so much that I can do to pull back my own consumption. And hopefully, you know, one day getting into this career where I can work in a more sustainable way, you know, hopefully for a secondhand brand or a fashion tech brand that's really helping to make fashion more circular.MaureenYeah, super cool. I know that you also worked for a trend forecaster, uh, in the past, sometimes a hidden part of the fashion industry. Can you think of any ways that experience has influenced your perspective on the fashion community at large?TinaYes. So as you said, I worked at a leading global trend forecasting agency and I was a brand consultant there and the trend forecasters were incredible. They did so much deep dive research. And what people sometimes think of trend forecasting is very different from what it is. So trend forecasting is this really complex and nuanced topic. Not just what's going down the runway, but there's these cultural forces that are constantly shaping fashion and what we wear. Um, you know, one of the things we're all familiar with is Y2K dressing. I think especially amongst Gen Z. And it really stems from this phenomenon called anemoia, which is nostalgia for a time you've never experienced. So you see Gen Z growing up during a period of extreme change and upheaval, and they were able to find comfort in this nostalgic clothing that maybe their parents wore or they'd look back in movies and it would just be this really comforting kind of way to express themselves through style.MaureenThat's really interesting. Like, and I think it's so, so important to always think about that cultural aspect of how we get dressed because, I would never say that the choices that I make for what I wear are in a vacuum, right? Like, I can't really distill down my choices and be like, yeah, that's a hundred percent me, babe. Like, you know, there's going to be things that I choose that are because there's a social or cultural context. And that's fine. I don't have to be 100% individual in every choice that I make because, again, it's not realistic. I appreciate that social component there because we are social creatures and we also are emotional. So the idea that we would want to create I think you said, um, like comfort or that feeling of nostalgia through our clothes. That makes a lot of sense. What was your favorite thing about working for the trend forecaster?TinaIt definitely made me think about fashion much more. Probably a deeper level than I had before, just understanding, you know, what is actually driving the trend. Or in a fun way, you can see what's bubbling up. With the Barbie movie, you could kind of see pink just reach the zenith within the fashion industry. And then kind of fall its way back down. So there's definitely that very Um, emotional connection to fashion that you just touched on societal connection to fashion, political connection to fashion that you can really see clothing evolving as well as just how we're interacting with it in social media, which is. Absolutely fascinating as we've seen micro trends peak over the last few years. Now we're coming back to personal style, which I absolutely love. I love seeing how people decide to get dressed. So. Just having both of those aspects is fascinating within trend forecasting.MaureenYeah, I hadn't even thought about trend forecasters mining social media. That makes sense. Wow. Wow.TinaYeah, it's definitely, it's definitely the time capsule, I would say, of the 2000s through now. It's a way to really track trends and understand what's going on in the cultural zeitgeist.

Today's guest is Rachel Margaret, a personal style and beauty YouTuber. She’s known for her humor, great style, and ability to eloquently tackle complex style challenges like, can we experience contentment with our wardrobes? She also loves thrifting, and playing with color. Yep, you’re gonna love her. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe everyone has style. Through conversations with inspiring guests, we explore how to tune into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully.MaureenWelcome to the podcast! I have been a really big fan of your YouTube channel, Rachel, Margaret, for a while now. I just heard that you started only a year ago. RachelYeah. January, February of last year. Yeah.MaureenWow. So can you share a little bit about what your channel is about and how you got started?RachelWell, I think I've always wanted to do something like that, at least since I became an adult, I wanted to do something creative. But I'm a perfectionist, and I've always kind of held myself back. And so about a year ago, I just uploaded a Project Pan video, because I knew if I overthought it, I was just not going to do it. So I just uploaded a Project Pan, and I've been kind of trying to just be consistent and do it ever since. And it's slowly evolved over time. Now, I would say that it's mainly about developing a relationship with consumerism and style that flows from a place of contentment and joy.And I really struggled with compulsive shopping in my own life. And I also thought it might just be helpful for me to share my own thoughts for me really, and then also hopefully, for other people too. MaureenYeah, absolutely. All of that really comes through in your videos, this idea of contentment. And I think it's such a positive way to deal with what can be a tricky subject which is like, struggling with overconsumption. To that point, I think it can be kind of hard to discern when we're shopping the right amount, or when we're shopping too much, according to like, maybe our own preferences. For you personally, what did shopping compulsively feel like? How did you know that was something you wanted to address.RachelYeah, it is a fine line to walk. I think it can be really hard to know what health looks like in so many areas of our life. But you know, in shopping with shopping in particular. I think for me, a really good gauge of the healthiness of a particular action is my ability to pick up or put down that action as I please. Or I guess, to use a different analogy, you'd like to turn up or turn down the dial. I guess, just to clarify. I've never been diagnosed with a shopping addiction or compulsive shopping, or anything like that, because I think that the behaviors exist on a spectrum, and I'm sure that there are people who deal with it much more severely than I do. I think for me, a really good gauge of the healthiness of a particular action is my ability to pick up or put down that action as I please. Or to use a different analogy, you'd like to turn up or turn down the dial.Personally, I began to clock my relationship with shopping as compulsive when I would be shopping for some normal reason, and you know I had the dial turned up a little bit and I would recognize, okay, it's enough now, and I would go to turn the dial down, and I would be unable to and it was kind of like I was thinking about this last night as I was falling asleep, but it's kind of like being caught in an undertow in the ocean, in a rip current. Has that ever happened to you?MaureenThankfully, no.RachelIt's happened to me, and it can be really scary. It's such a strong current. And I think what they'll teach you. If you get caught in an undertow is to try and swim direct. Well, don't try actually to swim directly into shore, because if you do, you'll get worn out, the undertow will be stronger than you. Instead, swim parallel to the shore until you get out of the rip current, and then you can swim back. So it's kind of like that for me when I'm in. I call it like a shopping spiral like any episode. I'm able to sense that the action is compulsive or distinct from regular shopping behaviors, because I'm no longer just swimming in the ocean. There's like another force outside of my own logic, my own discernment, my willpower. and it's acting upon me, and it's pulling me out to sea, preventing me or making it much harder for me to do what I would like to do, which is to swim back to shore. So that's kind of what it feels like, and that's what I'm working on, which is just keeping my hand on the dial, and making sure that I'm connected enough with myself to be able to turn the dial up or down as I see fit.MaureenI mean, you have such a beautiful way of speaking. And what a great analogy this idea of the rip current. It's such a great way of thinking about it, because to your point, it's not about putting a label on, or some sort of diagnosis. Because I think that can be, you know, very overwhelming. It can be overly medical. It really takes you out of your own experience in your own, of what you're like, what you're feeling and what you're struggling with. And so almost, I think it's so important to to teach ourselves what our threshold for compulsive behavior looks like, because it may be, you know, compulsive behavior for one person is like potentially much smaller in comparison to someone else. But that doesn't mean that it still doesn't feel out of sync. We all have our own threshold. So I think that's the main reason I wanted to ask you is like, how how can we learn what that feels like for us? And I mean just what a what a great answer. And also some ocean-safe swimming advice. I didn't have that on my Bingo card, but great reminder for the upcoming summer season!At the end of last year, at the end of 2024, you shared a really authentic raw video about only keeping your favorite clothes. And what that taught you. You start that video with, “In the past, I wouldn't have said that I was very self-critical, or that I didn't trust myself, but I have a closet full of other people's opinions and preferences that proves otherwise,” for anyone who hasn't had a chance to watch that video yet, can you share how you came to this realization?RachelYeah, absolutely. I well, I feel like I've come to this realization in the past. I've learned. you know, it was so many of the things that we need to learn in life. We learn it. I learned it then, and then I've had to learn it again and again and again, and each time you learn it it gets deeper and deeper and more settled within you, and it actually starts to become a part of you. So it's not just something that's in your head, but it's something that you really believe and act out of. Just for context, a few months ago, I stumbled across this really beautiful wooden wardrobe, and while I was out thrifting, and it, it led to this whole series of epiphanies and realizations, and one of those. One of those realizations was just a desire for fewer things, I think, or for, like a more curated selection of things, my favorite things. And I've known that on some level I've recognized that desire within myself, but I've struggled to implement it like there's always reasons to have more to keep that shirt or that pair of pants just in case right like. Or I gain weight, or I get invited to this very specific kind of event. You know, it's like you can always find a reason to keep the maybe items, even though they're just so-so. But there was something about seeing that wardrobe that day, and having this vision before me of a life in a closet that included only my favorite things. and it really gave me an impetus, I guess, to like shed that outer layer that I've always held on to and so, as I was decluttering this most recent time, and I guess also in previous declutters, but I could really see the parts of my wardrobe that were not reflective at all of my own preferences and desires, but of someone else's. and this might be embarrassing to admit, but for many items in my closet. I could actually tell you like, Oh, yeah, I purchased that when I was following so and so, or I got that when I was binging her videos, and it just became exceedingly clear that I was in a habit of seeking legitimacy for my style by copying the style of others. And I think that that is very normal. It's really natural, you know, and a lot of ways subconscious like when you're 1st starting out finding your style. It's hard to know where to begin, and and it makes sense that you would start by copying what you see. It's like trying something on like a persona or a silhouette or a color palette. You have to trial and error those things. But I mean, yeah, experimentation is necessary. It's necessary to learn ourselves and develop our preferences. It's just that for me. I think that experimentation began to flow solely from and style opinions of other people. And yeah, I just kind of used that realization to trace the line back and to see what was true. Which is that I didn't seem to trust myself. I didn't consider my style preferences as legitimate enough to be the source of my experimentation and my purchasing, and that's why and how I came to that conclusion.I didn't consider my style preferences as legitimate enough to be the source of my experimentation and my purchasing.MaureenThat’s so powerful. This idea of you know, we're delegitimizing our own preferences. And I say we, because, same like I still relate. I mean, there are so many different people like influencers that I have really fallen deep into a rabbit hole around, and I just want to copy exactly what they have, even when they are saying don't buy what I buy like. Sometimes they would even say that. And I'd be like, I don't care. I'm gonna do it, anyway, you know, or like. it's just to your point. It's human nature. We want to just try stuff on. And you know, especially when we're unsu

Artist, writer and Caribbean-Colombian woman, Laura De Valencia Kirk joins me for today’s episode. I so enjoyed talking with her; she’s exactly as insightful and fascinating in real-life as you’d expect from her writing. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.MaureenYou're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe that everyone has style. In conversation with fantastic guests, we explore how to tap into our style intuition, so that we can dress authentically and live fully.Today's guest is the writer of La Deeply Shallow, a Substack newsletter that somehow manages to be both philosophical and playful, ultimately acting as an open invitation to play with fashion and take from fashion what you wish and leave the rest. You've seen her styling sweatpants like never before, artfully weaving social commentary into posts ostensibly about clothing, and generally being an editorial queen. Welcome to the show, Laura De Valencia Kirk.LauraThank you for having me. I'm very honored to be here.MaureenI'm so excited to hear more from you. So, as I already mentioned, your newsletter, La Deeply Shallow, is so beautiful. For anyone who hasn't read your work yet, would you introduce the concept and your approach to writing about fashion and personal style?LauraYeah. So when I created La Deeply Shallow when I started it, it was actually as as a Substack. It started a long time ago, about 5 years ago. But then I kind of abandoned it because I wasn't really sure where it was going, and it wasn't really about fashion. It was more about what I was researching as part of my MFA, as an artist. And then last year I just had this impulse to come back to it and write, and I think there was a lot of thoughts that were kind of condensing, and they finally found like an avenue, and that was La Deeply Shallow. In La Deeply Shallow, I bring to the surface the the importance of fashion which has historically been considered as a feminine topic, and hence not important, you know, as usual. So I honor fashion. I try to demonstrate how transcendental it can be, not only for showing who we are, but also to construct ourselves in the process of getting dressed, which I think it's the core or the most important aspect of it, and my approach is very intuitive. I write every week. I tend not to have things in storage, for, you know, several weeks ahead, which I probably should, because it would be, it would make my less anxious, but it also keeps me on my toes, and writing every week helps me be attuned to the conversation. What's going on, and also how clothes feel in my body. So, it kind of helps me be more present. That's the whole concept. And I think I hope that that's being transmitted and people feel it, and it helps them also be more attuned to to their own act of getting dressed and daily.MaureenYeah, I mean to your hopes—absolutely. There's something kind of almost magical about the way that you write… It's so like, deep and complex, but somehow effortless at the same time, which, of course, I don't mean that you're not spending time and effort on it, but just as a reader, it's so easy to engage with. I just feel this almost like kind of lightness on very complicated topics, and specifically the way that you incorporate social and political commentary into your pieces. I mean, it's just very like it's kind of full circle to hear that when you started the column, it wasn't even about fashion at all, and I can see that, it’s about fashion, but it's about so much more. How do you decide when to incorporate this kind of commentary versus just play with with clothing?LauraWell, I think it's all woven into who I am, because I think fashion is not just about the clothes is all kinds of things, and it probably has something to do with the fact that I have multiple interests. And I listen to all kinds of political discourse from all sides of the spectrum, philosophy, lectures podcasts all while I scroll on The Real Real! It's something I do. And I don't know if it's probably a good mental image of how my mind works and how I am wired, and I think most of us are multidisciplinary. We have lived so many lives, we are multifaceted, we, we contain multitudes. And, so, I think that that is just going to transpire in how I write. There's another aspect of it that simplicity or that lightness that you talk about. I think it's from the fact that I'm always translating, because I'm always, I tend to think in Spanish, and then I translate. So I think there's in that translation. I'm trying to understand my thoughts. But I'm also trying to find a way to be legible in a different language, and I think that also makes me be a little bit more. Just clear. I guess the fact that my language is not as sophisticated in English, also makes it be a little bit more clear.MaureenI highly doubt that. [Editors note: I meant that I think her work in English is so sophisticated!]LauraI don't know. Maybe that I would love to, you know, to figure out what it is. But I I make a big effort to make myself legible. And it's immigrant experience, and of constantly speaking in a different language….And then, yeah, there's always political commentary, and I don't try to do it. I've always made an effort not to be an activist. I respect activists, and I respect what they do. But I think ever since I became an artist, I understood that I wanted to connect more than lecture or impose a point of view, because I am in a point of my life where I'm trying to understand a lot of things. And I'm trying to think with people and think out loud. And I think when I adopt an activist voice, or when people adopt activist voices, there's kind of like a moral superiority or virtue signaling that it's kind of off-putting and prevents that connection that I'm trying to, that I'm trying to create with my audience.MaureenIncredibly well said. And I think again, it's really coming across, you know. I feel that that I'm able to engage with your work. You're allowing for a conversation. And, to your point, a lot of think pieces about slow fashion or or activism generally kind of come in with authority. As you know, ‘this is the way it is’, and ‘this is the way we should be thinking.’ And I think what you do so expertly is that you show that process, and you talk about how you got to where you are, and with all the complexity, and you make space for people to agree or disagree with you and have a different experience. And I think that's part of what's so magical about your writing is that I feel like you're bringing people closer rather than pushing them away. To your point, I almost think it's more successful in the way that it's a conversation. It's about connecting rather than being right. It's great to hear that's a strategic thing. It wasn't just necessarily something that happened. But it's a choice that you're making. And it's really happening.LauraYeah, I mean, and it's I think it's also how I conduct myself. I try. As I said before, I try to listen to different points of view on the same issue, and and try to understand where people are coming from. And, I sometimes I may not agree with with a certain side of the spectrum. I mean, that's fine. We're all trying to find the truth, but I don't think I have the revealed truth yet. So that's why I feel like I am still in that exploration. It's not that I don't assume positions. I think I have certain positions, but I don't think that my ideas and my positions are my identity. I'm always trying to be open to learning new things and understand where people are coming from, and and I'm glad that that comes across, as as you say.MaureenDefinitely, I think that's why so many people read your posts every week! Switching a little bit into your personal style…. I'm becoming more interested in the why behind how people dress rather than what we're wearing. In broad strokes, how do you decide what to buy or wear, or what not, to buy or wear?LauraYeah, I was thinking about this. This was a great question, and I'm glad that you asked me. I think I'm 100% committed to proportions. I can see some things that I adore in the store online, whatever. And but if the proportions do not work for me, I tend not to wear it in a non aesthetic dimension. I have become sharper at questioning why I like something I grew up in in a very small town with a lot of class bias. And so that class bias was easily reflected in how people dressed. And, it's very tacit. It's not talked about. But, you kind of absorb all that bias and all this, all the signals and and the signs and and the hidden messages that are part of the clothes, and and it takes time, and for me, moving to a different country to realize how much I wasn't questioning where my preference for certain items. What's coming from that bias? And, it's kind of like a little bit of deconstructing to construct again, and to kind of like. Try to mold yourself to who you really are.And and and yeah, so I think to your question, how do I decide what I wear? What I don't wear? There's definitely an aesthetic dimension. As I said, proportions to me are key. And then also a more non-aesthetic, more personal questioning of Where why do I look this? Why do I like this? And why don't I like it? Is it because something that was instilled in me, or is it because I generally do not do not find it appealing?MaureenHmm, hmm. Yeah, that's such a great question. And I think almost a lifetime question is, how do we decide why we like what we like?Are there any like specific examples that come to your mind as far as like maybe something that you used to like that once you kind of drilled into it, you realized it doesn't resonate as much now, or vice versa, something that you used to not really appreciate. But now over time, you appreciate more?LauraThere was a post where I talked about the ruffles, and this kind of very tropical Caribbean chic dresses, with florals and ruffles, and all these things, and at the mome

Today's guest is Corinne Fay from Substack newsletter, Big Undies. Corinne is also the co-host of the Indulgence Gospel with Virginia Sole-Smith, and the creator of SellTradePlus. We have a chat about her love of denim shirts, creating community online, and the importance of letting go of perfectionism so we can have fun with clothing.Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.You're listening to Intuitive Style, where we believe everyone has style. Through conversations with inspiring guests, we explore how to tune into our style intuition so that we can dress authentically and live fully. Today's guest is Corinne Fay from Substack newsletter, Big Undies. Corinne is also the co-host of the Indulgence Gospel with Virginia Sole-Smith, and the creator of SellTradePlus. Corinne, welcome to the show. Corinne: Thanks, I'm really excited to be here.Maureen: Can you tell us a little bit about SellTrade Plus specifically and the gap that you are hoping to address by starting that platform? Corinne: Yeah, so I started SellTradePlus in, I think it was 2018, a long time ago now. And I was really addicted to a few different resale accounts on Instagram. But I was like, I was feeling like I was seeing... Dozens if not hundreds of posts for stuff that wasn't in my size for every one that was in my size. And I also felt like there were certain things that like I needed to be able to buy clothes in that way, such as like garment measurements that weren't always there. And I was also thinking, like, if I went to a thrift store and I were shopping for myself, I would just go, I would walk in the door, I would go straight to the section that was my size. So I was just like, why not have a resale account that's just plus size? So we can kind of narrow in a little bit. Maureen: And the accounts that you were talking about, were those on social media? Corinne: Yeah, I was looking at Noihsaf, which used to be strictly Instagram. And, um, there was also, I think there were actually a couple, like, sell/trade slow fashion accounts. Like, I know there was one specifically for Elizabeth Suzanne and maybe a couple others. I was just going to say I was like. I really liked those spaces and I liked the community, but I just kind of felt like I could maybe narrow down a little bit. Maureen: I wanted to start our conversation today with that topic because I think it can be really hard to understand or explain for someone who isn't familiar with being excluded by secondhand shopping or availability of your size. I think it can be really hard to understand like just how real that issue is and I just wanted to really set the stage. Anyone can struggle with their body image and there's like no hierarchy of who can experience that. But when it comes to actually being able to find the clothing that you want to wear, there are some very real challenges if you live in a larger body. And I was just wondering if you could like share any of your experience with that and, and maybe on the optimistic side, you know, have you been able to set out or have you been able to accomplish any of the goals that you set out to with that platform, being able to, uh, create more of that community that you're looking for?Corinne: Yeah, I mean, I think the biggest and best part of SellTradePlus for me has been the community aspect. Like, I feel like there are so many people that I'm just, like, friends with now, you know? I mean, as... As much as you can be with people from the internet, but um, yeah, and I have, I've also, like, met people in real life through SellTradePlus. Like, I have a little group of friends here that, uh, We'll meet up, like, a couple times a year to do, like, in-person plus size clothing swaps. And a lot of those people I found through SellTradePlus. Um, but yeah, it is, like, a huge challenge. Um... Yeah, it's definitely not over. And I also... This is maybe not exactly what you're asking, but I think there can be so much sort of, like, perfectionism and moralism around, like, shopping in the correct way, like, only buying... Yeah, only buying secondhand or only buying from, like, small ethical businesses. And, like, for me, in my body, like, it's just not always realistic. Especially because, like, so many of... Those brands, like, you also can't try on, and even if they do offer expanded sizes, sometimes, like, they don't have the budgets to, like, test them on a whole variety of plus-size bodies, so it's just, like... It's a real challenge, and I think the sort of perfectionism aspect, like, doesn't really do us any favors.Maureen: With that in mind, how, how have you handled that perfectionist mindset? I mean, I know we're all work in progress, but is there anything that you do to navigate that, that perfectionism?Corinne: I mean, it's a constant challenge. I just try to like give myself grace in the same way that I would like someone, you know, a friend, someone I like and care about. I think we're all just doing the best we can out here. And just knowing, like, we're just doing what we can. Maureen: Yeah, I feel the exact same way. I mean, I think what I'm trying to do with Intuitive Style is really highlight that there's no right way to dress or participate in slow fashion. There's no right or wrong way to dress, period. I think, yeah, just trying to move away from that perfectionism and I think a lot of that comes from this place of, like, self-compassion, like what you were just saying about, you know, treating yourself like how you might treat a friend totally resonates with me. I think it's a really good way to go. Corinne: I feel like similar to dieting and diet culture, the thing that that kind of removes from eating and food is the joy element. A lot of we can get from style and fashion and clothes is joy and pleasure and like, fun and novelty. And so if we restrict ourselves in this way of only shopping from the right places or in the right ways….I think we have to leave room for the ability to have fun with it. Maureen: I'd love to hear more about that because I've listened to quite a few episodes of Burnt Toast by Virginia Sole-Smith. There seems to be a real strong theme of seeing diet culture in so many different aspects of popular culture and I was just wondering if you could share a little bit about kind of how that theme arose, and what, what you think about that? Corinne: So I also host the Burnt Toast podcast with Virginia Sole-Smith. And I think, I feel like she's really, you know, the expert and the person who has come up with the framing of, like... Is XYZ a diet in a lot of ways? I think it's just like we're talking about kind of like it's, it's the way that perfectionism can kind of like pervade all aspects of our lives. And I think, I sort of think of diet culture as like being under the perfectionism umbrella, like it's kind of like one part of that. And I think a lot of other people have sort of like identified that as being like under an even greater umbrella of like. White supremacy or like capitalism, you know, like all this stuff kind of goes hand in hand. But yeah, I, I, I think for me, it's complicated. It's like, how do you hold it? Multiple true things at the same time. Like, it's true, like, fast fashion is bad for the world. And, like, I do want to be able to, like, have fun with clothes sometimes. Maureen: Yeah. Yeah. It's hard. I know, and it's so, it's so much easier to write, uh, you know, a post about fast fashion is bad, like, end of story. And I think it's so much easier to write that. And then it's so much more difficult to bring nuance to that. Going back to Substack a little bit, one of... my favorites of your posts on Big Undies, you touch on exclusion within fashion Substack and specifically how the most popular writers on the platform linked to high-end fashion with limited size offerings. So can you talk a little bit more about, you know, how you decided to write that post and, you know, how you feel about it today? Corinne: Yeah, I kind of sat with that post for a while because I was really feeling like I wanted to like quantify what I was feeling in a way like I was feeling like I'm following all these people who are like talking about really cool clothes I love what they're talking about and like none of it is for me basically. But I was also like, am I just, like, do I just have a really narrow, like, am I just not finding the right people or, you know, like, am I missing the links where they're linking to something above a size 10? And, I don't think I was missing that for the most part. Um, but yeah, I don't know. It's a hard feeling. Like, I feel like there's a part of me that, like, Just wants to know what cool people like. Like, I just wanna be in the know and like, know what- Other people are doing. And then there's part of me that's like, I want to completely block this out and ignore it. Because like, none of this is for me. So I, again, I think it's just a balance of like, figuring out what what you can take and what you need to sort of, like, ignore. I don't feel like a ton has changed since I posted that, but I did, I did get like really nice responses for the most part. I’m curious how you feel about that?Maureen: I mean, reading it was just incredible, and I guess I should clarify, I would say that I'm in like a mid-sized body, so I definitely am not on the extreme end, but they're... I also very much relate, like, if there are three sizes in something, it will not fit me, probably. Um, you know, like, I wear, like, an extra large, like, a sixteen kind of vibe. Yeah. And you know, especially the thing that like drives me absolutely insane, is some brands that I try are too big and then some brands that I try I wouldn't fit into the larger size. And I'm like, make it make sense, because, you know, human bodies, like we're on a spectrum and there's like this big gap between like straight sizing and then plus sizing. And I happen to be right in that gap.

Registered Nurse, veteran, wellness coach, author, and public speaker (phew!), Kori Rae Kovacs BSN RN joins me in conversation today. She shares wisdom from her personal and professional experience, actionable suggestions for how to move past shame to dress authentically, and a new question to help us all figure out how we want to dress.Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.Maureen: As a life and wellness coach, you specialize in inspiring others to embrace unique strengths, essentially matching our outsides to our insides. I love this concept. Can you share a little bit of a glimpse into your approach?Kori: Yeah, absolutely. I came up with this phrase about, you know, bringing your insides outsides, or bringing this like matching component of what you feel who you are on the inside, who you are at a soul level, and really getting the opportunity to share that out in the world. I feel like I came across this concept. I'm not really sure where, but I developed it kind of became a mantra for me when I realized that I have this beautiful being inside of me that is just wanting to come out. I had really gone through a really challenging time in my life, and I felt like. I was kind of hiding myself, and when I started reconnecting with this person that I am, you know, this person who has grown through resiliency through things that have been challenging. Then suddenly I realized, Wow, she's a really cool person. I want to bring her out into the world. And so I started matching my outsides to the person that I was feeling and getting to know on the inside. And when that happened I just feel like I was like coming out of a cage. Suddenly my wings, just like burst out, and I was able to really show up in the world as the person that I believe that I am.Maureen: That's incredible. And you talk about this idea of, you know, you've been through these difficult situations, and it almost sounds to me like that inner confidence came first, and then the outside happened second, do you have a perspective on, you know which need? If you can, fake it till you make it? Or does the inner confidence come first? Does it kind of depend? Or at least just speak from your perspective.Kori: Yeah, that's such a great question, because I think we live in a day and age where they talk about, you know, faking it till you making it or putting this front on the outside, but really not feeling confident on the inside. I know I share that story a lot with my audience is that I believe that confidence comes from your self-trust within yourself. It's not something that you can just snap and say, Oh, I feel confident today I'm going to go out and do this thing. I think that feels really forced. And so to me, it's about building trust with yourself getting to know who you are, and then expressing and taking action from that step that truly brings the confidence out in you, because you can feel confident, maybe in in some things, you know, but not in other areas. And I truly believe that you know, if you look up confidence in the, in the etymology. I'm a huge etymology nerd. So if you look at confidence, what that means, it really means a reliance or deep trust in something or someone, and when we talk about confidence about you having a deep trust and reliance in yourself, to be able to go out and be this person that you know that you can be so when you start building that self trust. Then that's really where the confidence starts to grow.Maureen: How have you built self trust, personally?Kori: That's such a great question. I you know a lot of it had to come from a place of compassion. Like, of being human. And I had gone through a really hard time in my life. I became a single mom, and my career took a shift. I was going to school to become a nurse during the pandemic, and things just really fell apart in my life. Trajectory as I was approaching, and I felt a lot of shame and a lot of guilt about the direction of where I was going, and in addition to that, I had gained like pounds. And so there was all these things that had happened, and I really lost my confidence and my faith in myself to be able to go out into the world and show the world who I was. So I feel like the moment that I decided to offer compassion for this place, and in the survival mode that I had been in and what had happened to me in my life. Suddenly it opened up space for me to actually get to know who I was, and when that happened, I started taking steps by journaling and meditating and moving my body in a way that felt genuine to me and that consistency of really finding out who this person was. Suddenly. Now I was like, oh, you're actually a pretty cool kid. I really kind of like you. And so like, day by day, that trust just started to build. And then I was able to go back out into the world and show, you know, come out in my style and come out, you know, and start a business, and and all of these things that honestly, a couple of years ago I wouldn't have had the courage to do.Maureen: I mean, it makes me feel somewhat emotional, you know, talking about that thick layer of shame that just can sit, sit on us, and make it so difficult to like crack through into the person that we actually are. And just I so relate to that. I want to talk more about this idea of self-compassion, and maybe you can talk about that with, sharing a little bit about more about how your relationship with your body has changed, you know, being a veteran, being a registered nurse, a parent life coach, you know, and then also that that kind of weight gain that you experience. Can you tell us a little bit more about? You know your relationship to your body, and how that's changed over time.Kori: Oof! That has been a challenge. I feel like my whole life. You know I was a dancer. I was a dancer when I was growing up, and I just loved moving my body. But as I went through puberty suddenly I became a very curvy girl. I had, I mean, overnight, you know, by the time my freshman year I was a double d, and I had big hips and big thighs. I kind of have a you know, curvy but athletic, muscular body, and it didn't fit the mold of being a dancer. As a matter of fact, my my junior year of high school. I was not. I was not allowed to join the pom squad, because they literally told me I my body was distracting like that. My boobs were too bouncy that it was. It was too sexy like you think about that. And I'm like, Oh, my God!Right, and that there's these messages that just kept telling me that my body was wrong. The very first night I was in Boot camp you brought up being a veteran. The very first night I went to. They made me stand at attention for 45 minutes because they didn't know what to do with me, because I had. I had scored a perfect score on the Asvab, which means I could basically do whatever job in the military I wanted, but I was 2 pounds under their weight limit, and they were like.The first words that were told to me is like Skaggs. That was my maiden name with Skaggs. They're like “Skaggs. You are lazy. That's your problem.”Maureen: Oh!Kori: So, yeah, so there was this and that carried with me. Lazy. You're lazy because they looked at my body, and they said, You know they looked at my weight. They looked at my body, even though I was. Oh, my gosh! I was 146 pounds, by the way, like, really, this is ridiculous here. But they said that I just I didn't care about my body, and that I was lazy, and that message was carried around for a decade, and I internalized all of these messages that my body was wrong, that I was. You know I was also hyper sexualized in in the military. And you know, experienced a lot of things that I shouldn't have had to go through because of that. And you know, after I got out suddenly, I realized I had a lot of feelings about my body, and they were not. They weren't good. They weren't good. So then, you know, I really did have to come face the music a little bit about that relationship with my body, because it really was hurting me, and I didn't realize it. So when I came to that point of compassion. Suddenly I realized that relationship was so severely damaged. and I remember crying one day when I had this insight that my body was my soul's mate. I just had this beautiful concept that my soul came here to earth to express itself, to do its mission to, you know, whatever my soul came here to do, and that my body was here to support that. And so they literally are a team together. And I had been hating this other part of me, and it like I was almost crushing when I have remember, I remember just bawling my eyes out when I realized that. And so I decided from that day on that I was going to get to know who this souls mate was, who my souls may, who my body was, and that changed everything. That was years ago when that happened. And it just, everything changed after that.Maureen: Good for you, and I mean, I want to acknowledge to the trauma that led to the shame around your body right? Because it's not just that people were making these comments about your body. It was what they, what these comments meant about who you are as a person. This idea of laziness based on your physical appearance, which is, you know, so much driven by genetics, to begin with. [Editor’s note: and zip-code]Kori: Right.Maureen: And then. But really like it wasn't just that they're commenting on your body. They're they're making it mean something about you. And that's how we get to this idea of shame, which is basically I always want to clarify. Shame and guilt are different. Shame is, I am bad, and guilt is, I did something bad and. Really getting to to see that difference. And self-compassion is when we can look at ourselves and say, at the core, we are okay. We are good, we have good intentions, we do our best, and sometimes we will make actions that are not in alignment with our own values. For so many reasons that happens and be able to say, and I love myself anyway, and that could

Popular Substack writer, communications executive and 20+ year veteran of the fashion and beauty industry, Sogole Kane joins me for this week’s episode.Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeWelcome to Intuitive Style. My name is Maureen Welton. Today's episode is a great one featuring Sogole Kane from Another Fashion Newsletter on Substack. I had such a great time chatting with her about her experience with personal style, her concept of intuitive dressing in 2025. Plus, I got some advice from her on how to bring fun back into my wardrobe after getting really analytical about what I was wearing. Sogole also shares her experience turning the corner on postpartum after about seven years of her body being in constant flux, and how excited she is to be coming back to her self and dressing for herself moving forward. I hope you enjoy.MaureenYou posted a somewhat recent post about wanting 2025 to be the year of Intuitive Styling. Obviously I couldn't agree more. So, for anyone who hasn't had a chance to read your post, would you just kick us off by sharing what what intuitive style means to you?SogoleYes, absolutely. Well, you know, it's a great question. Because I think the crux of intuitive style is ultimately and what it means to each individual person, because that's the true reflection of intuition. Right? So what it might mean to me could be different, to what it means to you or somebody else. And I think that's kind of the bigger message.But but really, what I was trying to get across in that post and also just my general way of thinking for this year and beyond, is to really listen to our instincts, to our intuition, to our gut when making fashion and style choices, because ultimately that's where we're going to see the the best representation of ourselves. And usually when you feel like you're representing yourself in the best way possible, that's when true confidence and comfort in your own skin tends to shine through.And, that's that's the holy grail, right? I feel like the reason we're all here on Substack or on social media talking and about style and sharing outfit photos and engaging in the discourse is because I think we're all interested ultimately in how do we achieve that, that feeling of, feeling 100% confident and comfortable in our own skin and in the image that we are projecting out there into the world.And I think in intuitive style, the way to do it because, it helps us stay true to who we are and to what's important to us. I mean, I'm getting real deep here, but, like, what do we really value? Not just in style and fashion, which can sometimes feels, you know, superficial, which, I disagree. I think it's not superficial at all, but that's a whole different topic. But I think, just in life, like how, how do we what do we value in life and how do we reflect those values in the way that we are communicating to other people? And one of the biggest ways we communicate to each other is through fashion and what we put on our bodies.So, that's really what it is to me. It's about staying true to yourself and expressing that internal feeling you have, outwardly.MaureenLike, mic drop. I couldn't have said that better myself. Just from top to bottom. I think what I'm starting to view this podcast is almost for the style podcast for people who don't care about style. Of course, knowing that you and you and I both do, deeply. But almost this, this idea of, there's not really boundaries on what it means to be stylish, or at least I think we're moving in that direction as a as a culture. I think we're moving towards this place of style is self-expression and, and giving more people, space to, to dress how they want. And, I think this idea of, of tuning inward and bringing what's inside outside is, is really the best way to kind of, I guess, broaden the circle, of people who care about personal style. I mean, everybody's getting dressed every day, and so why can't more people be part of the style community?SogoleYeah!MaureenI don't know if that's ever on your mind too.SogoleOh, well, yeah! I think so, I mean, listen, there's a reason it's the word personal comes in front of the word style is so many times. Right? Because at the end of the day, what we are talking about is deeply personal and and deeply individualistic to every human being on this planet. You know, the way that I interpret a trend or, you know, a pair of pants or the way a look that I'm going for is going to be completely different than how you might interpret it or how somebody else would.And and that's okay. And I think what's happened in this day and age, you know, of social media, which, by the way, is a is a wonderful thing. I think we're so lucky to live in an era where we have such access to incredible images and ideas and, and, and thoughts, you know, all around us, I think that's such a wonderful, environment to engage with and, and be a part of, but ultimately, I think the most important thing is that we have to we're all editors.We have to edit our own lives in a way that makes sense for us. And so you're receiving information and imagery and concepts and inspiration all the live long day, right? You know, you're on your phone, you're walking down the street, you're in a museum, wherever you are. You're constantly being fed information. And it's how you process that information and translate it into your own life.SogoleThat ultimately is what we're getting at when it comes to expressing yourself through personal style. So that's what I think I was trying to also get at in this in this post and in general is that, just because quiet luxury was a huge trend or just because you know, something is popular or you see a lot of people wearing something doesn't necessarily mean that you have to run and go do it, too.Now, if it resonates with you and if it really speaks to you, that's one thing, because that's you having a authentic reaction to, you know, information that you are processing from the outside world, that's great. Like, that's that's what we want, right? When that happens, that's where the magic happens. But otherwise, when you're when you're doing something just because everyone else is or because it's something that's cool or it's a trend that you love, that you think is interesting, but you don't know how to translate it for your body. That's where things start to get a little bit clunky, right? Like that's where we might maybe lose the connection to who we really are and what we're trying to express. And it gets lost in the shuffle. So I always say, you know, absorb it, but take from it what serves you and leave the rest behind.MaureenI think it can be very difficult to, to ascertain whether or not we like something authentically versus just we've seen so much of it that it it's like burned into our brain. Can you share how you might discern that, whether or not a trend is for you versus just something for the world?SogoleOh, I mean, this is like, such a great question. I love this so much. Yeah. I mean, it goes I go back to, the emotional side of it, like, where do you you have a physical or emotional or visceral reaction to something where it really like, like hits you like, and it's so hard to put into words because, you know, at the end of the day, feelings are hard to define sometimes.But for me, it's when I when I see something: an item or a concept or the way somebody put something together, and I have this like innate feeling that will take over where I'm like, oh, wow, I like that. It gets that like immediate reaction, where it's beyond logic. It's not me thinking about, oh, well, maybe like, this pair of pants would look great with this. That's all great. And those are good practices to undertake. But that's sort of, you know, step three four and five. I think step one is that initial gut reaction that you have to something. And so if you see a trend or you see an item, you know, I go back to of course, that, that Juju Viera shell necklace.MaureenI was so ready to talk about that. Yes.SogoleI mean, listen, that was like part of part of what drove that post. And I know I talked about it in that, in that post as well, and it's sort of become, you know, Substack lore at this point. But I do think that, when I first saw that necklace, because, at some point you have to see something for the first time, and then of course, you start to see it everywhere. Right? But I, I really do forget who I first saw it on. I'm sure it was, you know, Leandra Medine Cohen or somebody incredibly fashionable, but, I did see it somewhere first. And my first initial gut reaction was, oh, my God, I need that necklace. Like, it was something about the piece that really spoke to me. And, it just I had that initial emotional gut reaction to it.And of course, you know, when you find out what it is and you go and you do your research and you're like, wow, that is that is, more than I was looking to spend on a necklace at this point in time. And so you bank it and you think about it and it kind of goes on your wish list or wherever it goes.And then, of course, the thing that happens is, you know, you know, of course, you start seeing it everywhere, right? So then you start seeing it on for other chic women or influencers or whoever, and then it starts to bubble up into this like thing, this, this, this kind of entity that almost takes on its own life. I've had so many people comment on that post like, “I really liked that necklace too. But now I see it everywhere. And now I'm like, am I turned off by it now? Because everyone has it and it's not unique anymore. Should I still get it?” Like, I don't know, I still like it, but like I maybe I have the ick a little bit now because it's everywhere. It's not as like unique. And and you know, I think my comment to that and in general about this is like, while I understand the sentiment and and it's not devoid of its own kind of reasoning and value, why like why are you

This week, Stephanie Johnson joins me for a conversation about her Hard 75 Style challenge, how working as a shopping Editor impacted her style journey, and her brief dip into Jersey shore style in high school. Enjoy!Episode TranscriptThis transcript has been edited for clarity.WelcomeWelcome to Intuitive Style. I'm Maureen Welton. On this podcast, we explore the overlap between mindfulness and personal style. Today's guest, Stephanie Johnson, demonstrates week over week in her Substack newsletter, The Green Apple, what intuitive dressing looks like in practice. In our conversation, we talk about how her professional experience in fashion has influenced her personal style, how she modifies an outfit for a day in Brooklyn versus a day in Manhattan and about her hard seventy-five style series. I'm delighted to share this episode with you. Let's start by talking about your newsletter, which is how we met. Would you just tell us a little bit about [The Green Apple], please? Yeah. So, I started this newsletter, I want to say two years ago and I wrote like Three newsletters and then I, I kind of stopped sending them out. I got really into it again this past summer and I, I've been more consistent, but it was, it was really an outlet for me to write about what I wanted to write about. I worked for fashion digital magazines previously and a lot of what I wrote about was dictated by an editor or client so I just really wanted to write about style in a way that wasn't filtered and wasn't sponsored. So that's what I get to do. And it's mostly about personal style and just the way we show up authentically in the world and how we dress ourselves. Awesome. Well, I have really enjoyed following along. So speaking of which, you really caught my eye with your seventy-five hard style challenge. Can you share a little bit more about what that challenge is? Yeah! This challenge was started by Mandy Lee. I believe her handle on everything like IG, TikTok, and Substack is Old Loser in Brooklyn. Which is a great name. She started the challenge in 2024 as kind of like a New Year's resolution type thing on social media. And it's an iteration on that, like, seventy-five hard health challenge, which I actually know basically nothing about, but I know that's when you're like very disciplined for seventy-five days. So she just kind of applied it to style. The rules are mostly like get dressed for seventy-five days, document your looks, try not to buy anything new. And, and really understand why you're doing this challenge, like set your goals and intentions. So it could be because you want to save money or maybe you want to slow down what you're bringing into your business. Closet or you just want to get to know your style better. One of the rules I haven't been so great about is she wants you to really rely on your own kind of inspiration. So don't go on Pinterest or TikTok and just copy someone's look. And then another rule is to organize and clean out your closet before you start the challenge. And I believe also after, so you can kind of see like what you got rid of to start and what you ended with. What about this challenge attracted to you at this moment? Why did it seem like a good fit?I started getting into getting dressed, which, which sounds so crazy, but I've been working from home since 2019. So I very much fell into a rut, but I've been trying to get dressed for like two years really consistently. And I saw this challenge last year. And it just didn't feel like the right time for me. I just moved in 2025 and I think I was like, okay, you know, I'd already cleaned out my closet. I purged a lot. I'm living in New York now, which feels like you kind of have to up your style game, so I was ready to take it on starting this January. One thing in particular about your series on this challenge is that you have a particular rating system for how you think about the outfits. Can you tell us a little bit more about your rating system and how you landed on it? Yeah, that was something I just made up because my intention with this challenge besides like getting out of my PJs every day was to really learn more about my personal style. So I rate things on a scale of one to five when I wear them. One is like, this really doesn't feel like me. And five is like this, this does feel like me. The scale is really just based on like my intuition, which I know you speak about a lot in your Substack and just really leaning into authenticity. So it could be like how comfortable I feel in this and how much this may be leaned into my style words. It's just been a really helpful way to look back on an outfit and, and get a sense of how I felt when I wore it that day. It's so fun and so unique to see someone talking about rating your personal style with how it feels and how you experience being in the outfit. Just seeing that as such a focus of of you, how you decide success of your wardrobe, it really resonated with me because so much of the time I think it's popular or accepted to dress for other people and how you're going to be perceived. And just seeing your, your me writing felt really innovative and, and also exciting. And I think really it shows where we're moving as a personal style culture towards caring a little bit more about how we experience our own clothing rather than just letting everything be about how we're perceived. Thank you. That's exactly what I was going for. And I guess I didn't even think of that, but it is a lot about how I feel versus how other people perceive me. One outfit of yours that really caught my eye, was that some of your, you know, I think in general you would say, right, that your style is on the casual side. And I noticed that there were a couple kind of more lounge outfits that you rated quite highly. There's a lot of pressure that lounge clothing isn't stylish or doesn't involve effort or doesn't convey effort and. I was just curious, can you share a little bit more about your experience with lounge and how and why that would be something that you rate really high? It's something I'm kind of working through because I'm not a dressy person. I tend to dress very casual. Like one of my style words is like undone. So if something feels too polished, it doesn't feel like me. Very often if I'm wearing something that feels really comfortable and like layered and it's in a color palette, I like, I'm going to give it a high rating and that tends to be my athleisure outfits. Something I am trying to sift through is. Does this feel like a me outfit because I had fallen into such a habit of always wearing this type of clothing or does it really feel like the type of person I am authentically and want to dress as? So I'm kind of working through that. Some outfits that are really casual might get like a five out of five and some might get like a two out of five because I put no effort in and I just kind of threw on sweatpants. That goes back to the idea of the challenge and your effort overall to to get dressed. Would you share what getting dressed means to you? Like, what is not getting dressed? What is just putting on clothes? Yeah, it's like a very basic definition. It's getting out of my pajamas because... Literally, that's it. I have had a job working from home for so long that I could like roll over and just in my pajamas start working. So fully in the morning, getting out of bed, putting on a complete new outfit. The days when I basically threw on something that's like outside pajamas. I'm like, okay, you didn't really do the thing today. I've had a few days in this challenge where I've noticed that, but some days I'm like, okay, I'm going to wear these leggings. And I'm going to wear high socks with them and I'm going to layer a sweatshirt with a turtleneck and I'm going to put on jewelry. So, I intuitively know when I'm making an effort and when I'm not and how to differentiate those two. Would you say, now I'm putting my, my point of view into this, but like to me getting dressed would be putting on something that I'd be comfortable wearing outside of the house. Do you think, is that any way that you're defining it? Yeah, absolutely. I think I think that's actually a perfect definition. I think there was a time in my life where I probably could have worn PJs outside of the house, but now I want to always feel like I put a little effort in.Sure, sure. And, and societal, you know, during COVID it was particularly, you know, different as for what was okay to wear outside. We were wearing a mask anyway. Yes. So this is kind of a personal anecdote, but I am curious what you think about this. Going back to the idea of wearing stuff at home that you would be comfortable wearing out of the house putting in that effort. A couple years ago, I had more disposable income and I did a one-on-one personal styling session with Allison Bornstein, the stylist. That's cool. It was very cool. And if I could go back, I think the biggest thing that I regretted was I had us focus our conversation on the clothing that I wore only out of the house and I was like anything that I work from home and we don't need to talk about because that stuff is fine. And now if I could play that back I would be like how can I merge the two, how can I make sure that the clothes that I'm wearing at home are also things that I could wear outside of the house, because I also work from home I should have said that. And I have since 2020. Does that idea resonate with you as far as like merging kind of what you would work from home in versus what you're wearing outside of the house or do you view that as a separate? No, that's so smart, and also that's so cool. I need to hear more about that because I would love to hear what she has to say about my wardrobe. But I realized probably two years ago, like working from home was probably going to be my reality for the foreseeable future. And I love it for a lot of reasons, but. In terms of getting up and getting d