How To Teach Kindness To Kids

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Teresa: One little thing can make a difference in somebody’s life and seeing her realize that and seeing her do these actions on her own without us telling her what to do, has been so amazing. For us, our biggest success is raising a daughter who is kind because that’s just her heart, and for us that’s the most important thing.

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Lois Paula: Whether you’re hoping to heal the world or heal yourself, this podcast is here for you, to highlight how kindness moves.

Nan: Moves you to take action, yourself. It just makes you feel something so good, it’s contagious. You might have been touched by a simple act of kindness, you might want tips on how you can act now in your community or you just love the feeling of doing good. 

Lois Paula: Welcome to Kindness Moves, a new podcast, brought to you by the INC Giving Project, we’re your hosts LP and Nan! 

Lois Paula: So today we are actually talking about a topic that hits close to home — raising kids, now specifically raising kind kids! Being a mother of two, this topic, is something that my husband and I, we always try to instill in our kids in different ways. But we know, there isn’t a one size fits all approach; but definitely, we value seeing and hearing what other parents have done to raise their kind kids.

Nan: Well you know LP, I, I gotta say, I don’t think you give yourself or Glenn, the credit that you guys deserve. You know you and your husband are definitely on the right track — trying is already the first step, and seeking knowledge is the second step in the right direction, so you’re on that right path. And I have had the privilege to meet your kids and to get to know your kids, and I gotta say they are truly kind kids. 

Lois Paula: Thanks to you Uncle Nan.

Nan: But I don’t have any little ones of my own… 

Lois Paula: Yet.

Nan: …yet, but I do have nieces and nephews, you know, and I also helped with the youth group in our local congregation, and I’ve come to learn that kids have such a wide range of personalities and influences so I can see why there isn’t a one size fits all approach.

Lois Paula: Yes, and I’m glad you brought that up Nan, you are a teacher in the Children’s Worship Service and so we’re grateful for you and your help and you’ve seen my kids and you’ve helped raise them and our co-officers, you know in the office and whatnot. So we’re grateful. It does take a village to raise a child so thank you in advance for all that you do for the youth in the Church Of Christ being a teacher in the Children’s Worship Service. 

But yes for all our listeners who are new parents, maybe you’re a grandparent or even that awesome aunt or uncle, like Nan, who is helping raise you know the kids in your household, this will be a fun and hopefully helpful listen to us all. So our guest today is actually a mom herself, who is also an educator, so let’s welcome everyone Teresa Castro.

Nan: Hi Teresa.

Teresa: Hey everybody, thank you so much for having me. Hi.

Lois Paula: Hello. Now Teresa before we get started, can you introduce yourself to our listeners? How long have you and your husband been parents?

Teresa: We have been parents for 10 years, going on 11.

Nan: Oh nice.

Lois Paula: All right, and your, your, you have one daughter, is that correct?

Teresa: Yes correct one girl.

Lois Paula: How has parenthood been thus far — 10 years, congratulations.

Nan: Yes congratulations.

Teresa: We have been really spoiled. She’s amazing. She’s an amazing little one. So she’s very talented and hardworking and so loving and so we’ve been really, really blessed, but she is, you know, going through those almost teenage years and we’re trying the best we can, but she’s still wonderful, we’re very lucky.

Nan: I remember being in that, at that age. I can say that I was not the kindest, so…

Lois Paula: You weren’t a kind kid? (laughter)

Nan: No, I tried to be, but you know as a young kid, you play in the playground.

Lois Paula: There’s a lot of influences like you said.

Nan: Yeah. But my parents did a great job and got me right back on track.

Teresa: Well that’s good to know it’s never too late. But luckily Katelyn has been, she is just intrinsically kind. So, it hasn’t been hard for us but we know that teenage years are coming. We’re not sure what they’re going to bring so we’re praying hard, but we’ll do our best, that’s all we can do, right?

Nan: Right. And you know, you hear it in this podcast, it’s in the title, “kindness” we hear the word kindness a lot. And it can be perceived in so many ways. So Teresa, what’s your idea or definition of kindness?

Teresa: Wow, that’s a big question. Yeah, kindness is, I mean of course it’s being friendly to others, but I think a big piece of kindness when it comes to when we’re talking to our daughter is being generous, and also being considerate. We often talk about, you know, being kind means putting others before ourselves a lot of the time, and we try to instill that with her as much as possible.

Lois Paula: Absolutely, and it’s something that you have to keep teaching, it’s not something that you just teach one time and you know it goes away but like you said she’s entering in her teenage years, and there’s a lot of influences so hopefully you know what you have taught and what you will continue to teach like you said will will be implemented. 

But we’re talking about kindness and parenthood. But what about upbringing? How has kindness been instilled for you specifically Teresa, as you were growing up? Do you recall certain moments where it was in your family and now it’s impacted the way that you treat Katelyn?

Teresa: Oh definitely. Growing up, my parents were, you know, they were very strict but they were also very kind, not just to me but to everyone around them. So I was very blessed because when my parents raised me they really did teach me to put others first and I think that was a big thing so whatever I do, I accomplish, whatever I get, I just make sure that you know I’m serving others and that’s a big part of my life, life of service. That’s why I’m a teacher and that’s why we instill that in Katelyn as well, because you know when she does that for others that, of course makes her feel good too and it’s the right thing to do. 

So, I always saw my parents giving to others very generously. A lot of the times you know putting others first and making sure they got everything they needed before we got all the things that we needed. And growing up, you know, it was hard to understand at first but then after a while you saw and you saw how wonderful it felt to really give to others so seeing them do that and being generous with their time and with their resources, not only with our family but with friends and with people from our Church, that was, that really made a big impact on me and I knew that it was something I wanted to carry on to my to my daughter and my family.

Lois Paula: Absolutely, I agree. I think when I look back, it was my mom who I looked back at as my hero, you know like, the most selfless person in the world. But yeah kindness is definitely something we strive for every single day. It’s easy to disregard it, especially the times that we’re living in everyone is, you know, needing something so it’s easy to kind of just forget about it and really focus on ourselves. Yeah, I’m glad that, that inspiration has allowed you to carry what you’ve learned on into your parenthood as well. So in a way, you know, being kind to something we all need to really fight for like you said, and make sure it continues despite all of the negativity around us.

Teresa: Right, absolutely. And I like how you put it that you have to fight for it because it’s not something you know you can learn it one day, but a lot of things happen in life so we really do have to teach our kids to fight for what’s right, and whether or not other people are doing it, you know, you have to really fight for, for kindness for being kind to one another and yourself as well.

Nan: Yeah, I totally agree. You know kindness, it takes effort right. I mean it’s easy to only think of yourself or disregard the needs of other people and you know you talking about your parents and how they raised you to put the needs of others ahead of yours, you know I think that’s a really really great lesson to have been taught to you. And it’s great to hear how kindness was something that was instilled in you at such a young age, you know, and I really do think your parents found success because it seems to have really stuck with you even into parenthood.

Teresa: