In this raw, truth-first episode of Clean Your Toilet, Barbara joins Xing Jian to dismantle one of the most seductive lies in modern life: that success equals fulfillment.

Barbara had it all—status, professional momentum, elite programs, an impressive CV that sparkled on paper. Until it all disappeared. When the luxury lifestyle company she worked for shut its doors, Barbara found herself in a silence louder than she’d expected. No callbacks. No new offers. And slowly, the question crept in: Without my work, who am I?

What follows is a reflective, soul-searching conversation about the invisible grief of career loss and identity collapse. But more than that, this episode explores how Barbara began to rebuild—not through hustle, but through honesty. She created a personal newsletter, True Wealth, to process what wealth really means when there’s no title, no income, and no validation. And in doing so, she uncovered what she’d been missing all along.

We talk about:

• How prestige and performance can mask internal disconnection
• Why redundancy triggers an existential crisis more than a financial one
• Letting go of the “good girl” narrative of always striving, always producing
• Using writing as a tool for reflection, identity reformation, and emotional healing
• The difference between outer wealth and inner wealth

This episode will resonate if:

• You’ve ever achieved everything and still felt empty

• You’re currently in a transition, wondering what’s left when your plans fall apart

• You’re questioning if the life you’ve built is one you actually want to live

Key quotes:

"I thought I was wealthy in knowledge—but my inner wealth was suffering."

"I did everything right, and still ended up lost."

"True wealth is space. Ownership. Self-trust."

This is not a triumph arc. It’s a clearing. A clean-out. And a redefinition.

💼 Let go of the polished identity.🧠 Sit with the uncomfortable truth.💩 Flush what no longer serves.

Time to re-define what rich really means.