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The Accidental Negotiator
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The Accidental Negotiator

Author: Jim Anderson

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Professional negotiating is not just a business, it’s a science. Nobody knows more about the science of negotiating than Dr. Jim Anderson.

“I don’t embrace excuses for why your last negotiation was not successful, I embrace solutions.”

Over the last 25 years, Dr. Anderson has transformed failing negotiators worldwide.

Dr. Jim Anderson has spent 25 years negotiating everything from small sales with individual owners of companies to large scale military project contracts with teams of sales negotiators.

Welcome to the premier podcast for learning how to make sales negotiations effective! Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
67 Episodes
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Let’s face it, negotiating has never been easy to do and with the  arrival of the Covid-19 virus, it just suddenly became a lot harder.   These days nobody really wants to sit in a closed room for a long time  with a group of people who may or may not have been practicing safe  social distancing. However, life must go on and so negotiations do  continue. Many of our negotiations have now moved online. Today’s tools  allow this to happen relatively smoothly. However, even online disputes do pop up.  When they do, negotiators need to know how to deal with them. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
So first off – congratulations!  The last negotiation that you were  involved in went very well. You were able to use your negotiation styles  and negotiating techniques to get a deal that you feel proud of and  you’ve been congratulated by everyone you know for conducting a  professional negotiation. Right about now you are probably feeling a  real sense of pride. Now it’s time for you to move on to your next  negotiation. You feel that this next negotiation should go as well as the last one did.  However, is this feeling going to work in your favor or is it going to work against you? --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
So a negotiation is a business discussion that occurs between two  adults, correct?  Well, in a lot of cases this is a correct statement.  However, there are times when things can become heated during a  negotiation. When one side feels as though they are not getting their way, they start to look for ways that they can convince you to change your mind. One  tool that they have available to them besides using different  negotiation styles and negotiating techniques is to threaten you.  If they decide to do this, how should you react? --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
Every negotiator wants to become better.  However, the big question that we all face is how to go about doing  this. For some of us, reading books on negotiations or attending  negotiations can expose us to new negotiation styles and negotiating  techniques. However, it turns out that most of us would benefit the most  if we were able to cast off some negotiating misunderstandings that we all seem to be carrying around with us.  These “negotiating lies” are baring us from improving our skills. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
So – does the other side really mean what they are saying?  Will they  really do what they are promising to do? I’m pretty sure that you and I  can’t tell. The reason that we are so bad at detecting deception is because the most common signs of deception, such grammatical errors  and as increased blinking, tend to be quite difficult to notice and  interpret correctly. In addition, it may be difficult or impossible to  determine whether the other side’s claim is true or not.  If we can’t  count on being able to detect lies, a more fruitful approach may be to  find ways to discourage the other side from engaging in deceptive tactics in negotiation in the first place. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
As negotiators, our goal whenever we are starting a negotiation is to find a way to get the best deal possible.   This is not always an easy thing to make happen.  The best negotiators  are the ones who can use their negotiation styles and negotiating  techniques to both create value during the negotiation and then claim  that value as a part of a deal. In order to become better at making this  happen, the following 10 negotiation skills can be used. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
When we are involved in a negotiation that involves prices, we need to  keep in mind that no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating  techniques  are being used, it’s the first number that either  side presets that will play an important determining factor in how the  rest of the negotiation goes.  It turns out that opening offers  have a strong effect on price negotiations. What happens is that the  first offer typically serves as an anchor that strongly influences any  discussions that follows. Where things can start to get crazy is when  you realize that even random numbers can have a dramatic impact on  people’s judgments and decisions.  What all of this means is that  negotiators need to know how to anchor prices during a negotiation. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
So just exactly when is a negotiation over?  I’m pretty sure that by now you know that this is a loaded question – a negotiation is never over.  Even after we’ve been able to use our negotiation styles and  negotiating techniques to reach a deal with the other side, we still  need to make sure that they will keep their word and do what they  promised that they would do. However, things can get just a little bit  trickier if after the deal has been signed the other side comes back to  you. The reason that they’ve come back is because they want a renegotiation of the deal.  What’s a negotiator to do now? --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
Let’s face it, during a negotiation things can go wrong.  You were making  progress using your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to  work towards reaching a deal one minute and then all of a sudden you find yourself staring at an impasse.  You have made offers to the other side, they have made offers to you  and you thought that you were approaching middle ground; however, it now  appears as though you are not close enough to agree on a deal. Now what is a negotiator to do?  This might be the time for you to start to use MESOs in this negotiation. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
In addition to different negotiation styles and negotiating techniques  there are a number of different things that negotiators need to be able  to deal with during a negotiation.  Being overconfident is one of these. What we need to understand is that if we allow ourselves to become overconfident, then there is a good chance that it is going to affect both our judgement and our decision making process.  What we need are ways to detect when we are becoming overconfident and ways to deal with it when it happens. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
Negotiators view every negotiation as a type of game.  hey show up ready  to use their negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to compete  with the other side in order to see who can walk away being a winner.  I’m pretty sure that we all realize that we should be cooperating, but  instead all too often we end up competing to see who can win. The reason that we do this is because we arrive at the negotiation with the assumption that we’re dealing with a fixed pie – there is only so much to be had, and somebody is going to walk away  with more and somebody is going to walk away with less. We view a  negotiation as being a win-lose competitive situation.  What we really  should be doing is working with the other side to find more value in the  negotiation. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
During a negotiation, sometimes something amazing happens.  When one side  presents a number to the other side, that side can all of suddenly end  up irrationally fixating on that first number that was put forth at the bargaining table. This number is called “the anchor”. The other side (or us) can become fixated with it no matter how  outlandish it may be. Even when we know the anchor has limited  relevance, we can sometimes fail to sufficiently adjust our judgments  away from it. This is an example of the anchoring effect in  negotiations.  Negotiators can use anchoring to reduce risk in a  negotiation. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
When you jump into a negotiation, do you know what you want to get out  of the negotiation?  Perhaps a much more important question is does  the other side have a set of expectations regarding what they want to  get out of the negotiations no matter what negotiation styles or  negotiating techniques are used?  It turns out that as a  negotiator, one of your responsibilities is to make sure that during the  negotiations you take the time to carefully manage the other side’s  expectations. You need to make sure that when the negotiation is over,  their expectations have been met.  Now comes the big question – do you  know how to go about doing this? --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
When we enter into a negotiation, we are thinking about one thing: what  we’d like to use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques  to  get out of the negotiation.  Let’s face it, we’re rather self-centered when it comes to planning how our next negotiation is going to turn  out. As I’m pretty sure that we are all well aware of by now, thinking  only of ourselves when it comes to negotiating can lead to some long and  trying negotiations.  What if there was a better way? It turns out that it is and it has a name: logrolling. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
In the world of negotiating, despite all of the different principled  negotiation styles and negotiating techniques that get used, there are a  number of tactics that have achieve classic status.  One such technique is called the “good cop / bad cop” approach.  You’ll encounter this when you sit down to negotiate and one member of  the other side says that they really want to be able to reach an  agreement with you and at the same time another member of the other side decides to present you with an outrageous, even insulting, offer. A member of the other side urges them to make a concession.  This makes that member of the other side seem like a trusted friend.  You find yourself taking his advice and working hard to bridge your gap  with person who made the insulting offer, even proposing concessions you  never intended to make.  Guess what – you just fell for the good cop /  bad cop tactic. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
Negotiating is hard.  Negotiating when you are a woman is even harder.  Historically women have not been as aggressive as men. They have been  willing to settle for what is offered to them. However, to truly be  successful negotiators women need to start to think about what a man  would be able to achieve in their position.  What women need to start to  do in negotiations is to start to employ more assertive behavior. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
Negotiators are always looking for ways that they can get more value out  of their next negotiation.  Although there may be many different ways to  accomplish this such as using different negotiation styles and  negotiating techniques, one way that we tend to overlook too often is by  negotiating a right of first refusal. Just in case anyone doesn’t  remember what the right of first refusal is, also known as a matching right or right of first offer, it is  defined as being a guarantee that one side to a business deal can match  any offer that the other side later receives for what is being  negotiated.  As negotiators we need to realize that the rights of first  refusal could be a win-win tool that can enhance your negotiation skills, but to ensure that it is mutually beneficial, it needs to be negotiated with care. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
As negotiators, there are a few books that I’m guessing that we have all  pretty much read.  One of the classic negotiating books that everyone  should have on their shelves is “Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement  Without Giving In”. In this book, the authors explained that negotiators  don’t have to choose between either waging a strictly competitive,  win-lose negotiation battle or caving in to avoid conflict. What they  said was that negotiators can and should look for negotiation strategies  that can help both sides get more of what they want. If we take the  time to listen closely to each other, treat each other fairly, and  explore options to increase value, we can find ways of getting to yes  that reduce the need to rely on hard-bargaining tactics and unnecessary  concessions. Great idea.  Now exactly how can we go about making this  happen? --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
In the world of negotiating there are number of classic questions that  we all deal with each time we start a negotiation.  One of the biggest is  whether or not we should be the ones who make the first offer. The answer to this question is generally “yes” – lots of research has gone into what is called “anchoring bias” and it tells us that no matter what negotiation styles and negotiating  techniques are being used, we should be the ones who move first. What is  anchoring in negotiation you ask?  In a negotiation centered on either  price or another issue, the party who moves first typically benefits by  “anchoring” the discussion that follows on their offer—even if the  anchor is arbitrary. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
Let’s face it – you can’t negotiate without having some emotions come  into play.  We all tend to get upset, excited, depressed, and elated at  different times during a negotiation because of the negotiation styles  and negotiating techniques that are involved. Without a lot of surprise  it turns out that the people who study such things are learning about  the connections among emotions, negotiators, and decision making.  Since  such emotions can influence the results of our negotiations, it sure  seems as though we should take some time and understand how our emotions  can influence our outcomes. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
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