Claim OwnershipThe Accidental Negotiator
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© Jim Anderson
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Professional negotiating is not just a business, it’s a science. Nobody knows more about the science of negotiating than Dr. Jim Anderson.
“I don’t embrace excuses for why your last negotiation was not successful, I embrace solutions.”
Over the last 25 years, Dr. Anderson has transformed failing negotiators worldwide.
Dr. Jim Anderson has spent 25 years negotiating everything from small sales with individual owners of companies to large scale military project contracts with teams of sales negotiators.
Welcome to the premier podcast for learning how to make sales negotiations effective! Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
“I don’t embrace excuses for why your last negotiation was not successful, I embrace solutions.”
Over the last 25 years, Dr. Anderson has transformed failing negotiators worldwide.
Dr. Jim Anderson has spent 25 years negotiating everything from small sales with individual owners of companies to large scale military project contracts with teams of sales negotiators.
Welcome to the premier podcast for learning how to make sales negotiations effective! Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jim-anderson52/support
67 Episodes
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Let’s face it, negotiating has never been easy to do and with the arrival of the Covid-19 virus, it just suddenly became a lot harder.
These days nobody really wants to sit in a closed room for a long time with a group of people who may or may not have been practicing safe social distancing. However, life must go on and so negotiations do continue. Many of our negotiations have now moved online. Today’s tools allow this to happen relatively smoothly. However, even online disputes do pop up.
When they do, negotiators need to know how to deal with them.
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So first off – congratulations!
The last negotiation that you were involved in went very well. You were able to use your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to get a deal that you feel proud of and you’ve been congratulated by everyone you know for conducting a professional negotiation. Right about now you are probably feeling a real sense of pride. Now it’s time for you to move on to your next negotiation. You feel that this next negotiation should go as well as the last one did.
However, is this feeling going to work in your favor or is it going to work against you?
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So a negotiation is a business discussion that occurs between two adults, correct?
Well, in a lot of cases this is a correct statement. However, there are times when things can become heated during a negotiation. When one side feels as though they are not getting their way, they start to look for ways that they can convince you to change your mind. One tool that they have available to them besides using different negotiation styles and negotiating techniques is to threaten you.
If they decide to do this, how should you react?
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Every negotiator wants to become better.
However, the big question that we all face is how to go about doing this. For some of us, reading books on negotiations or attending negotiations can expose us to new negotiation styles and negotiating techniques. However, it turns out that most of us would benefit the most if we were able to cast off some negotiating misunderstandings that we all seem to be carrying around with us.
These “negotiating lies” are baring us from improving our skills.
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So – does the other side really mean what they are saying?
Will they really do what they are promising to do? I’m pretty sure that you and I can’t tell. The reason that we are so bad at detecting deception is because the most common signs of deception, such grammatical errors and as increased blinking, tend to be quite difficult to notice and interpret correctly. In addition, it may be difficult or impossible to determine whether the other side’s claim is true or not.
If we can’t count on being able to detect lies, a more fruitful approach may be to find ways to discourage the other side from engaging in deceptive tactics in negotiation in the first place.
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As negotiators, our goal whenever we are starting a negotiation is to find a way to get the best deal possible.
This is not always an easy thing to make happen.
The best negotiators are the ones who can use their negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to both create value during the negotiation and then claim that value as a part of a deal. In order to become better at making this happen, the following 10 negotiation skills can be used.
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When we are involved in a negotiation that involves prices, we need to keep in mind that no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating techniques are being used, it’s the first number that either side presets that will play an important determining factor in how the rest of the negotiation goes.
It turns out that opening offers have a strong effect on price negotiations. What happens is that the first offer typically serves as an anchor that strongly influences any discussions that follows. Where things can start to get crazy is when you realize that even random numbers can have a dramatic impact on people’s judgments and decisions.
What all of this means is that negotiators need to know how to anchor prices during a negotiation.
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So just exactly when is a negotiation over?
I’m pretty sure that by now you know that this is a loaded question – a negotiation is never over. Even after we’ve been able to use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to reach a deal with the other side, we still need to make sure that they will keep their word and do what they promised that they would do. However, things can get just a little bit trickier if after the deal has been signed the other side comes back to you. The reason that they’ve come back is because they want a renegotiation of the deal.
What’s a negotiator to do now?
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Let’s face it, during a negotiation things can go wrong.
You were making progress using your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to work towards reaching a deal one minute and then all of a sudden you find yourself staring at an impasse. You have made offers to the other side, they have made offers to you and you thought that you were approaching middle ground; however, it now appears as though you are not close enough to agree on a deal. Now what is a negotiator to do?
This might be the time for you to start to use MESOs in this negotiation.
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In addition to different negotiation styles and negotiating techniques there are a number of different things that negotiators need to be able to deal with during a negotiation.
Being overconfident is one of these. What we need to understand is that if we allow ourselves to become overconfident, then there is a good chance that it is going to affect both our judgement and our decision making process.
What we need are ways to detect when we are becoming overconfident and ways to deal with it when it happens.
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Negotiators view every negotiation as a type of game.
hey show up ready to use their negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to compete with the other side in order to see who can walk away being a winner. I’m pretty sure that we all realize that we should be cooperating, but instead all too often we end up competing to see who can win. The reason that we do this is because we arrive at the negotiation with the assumption that we’re dealing with a fixed pie – there is only so much to be had, and somebody is going to walk away with more and somebody is going to walk away with less. We view a negotiation as being a win-lose competitive situation.
What we really should be doing is working with the other side to find more value in the negotiation.
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During a negotiation, sometimes something amazing happens.
When one side presents a number to the other side, that side can all of suddenly end up irrationally fixating on that first number that was put forth at the bargaining table. This number is called “the anchor”. The other side (or us) can become fixated with it no matter how outlandish it may be. Even when we know the anchor has limited relevance, we can sometimes fail to sufficiently adjust our judgments away from it. This is an example of the anchoring effect in negotiations.
Negotiators can use anchoring to reduce risk in a negotiation.
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When you jump into a negotiation, do you know what you want to get out of the negotiation?
Perhaps a much more important question is does the other side have a set of expectations regarding what they want to get out of the negotiations no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating techniques are used? It turns out that as a negotiator, one of your responsibilities is to make sure that during the negotiations you take the time to carefully manage the other side’s expectations. You need to make sure that when the negotiation is over, their expectations have been met.
Now comes the big question – do you know how to go about doing this?
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When we enter into a negotiation, we are thinking about one thing: what we’d like to use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to get out of the negotiation.
Let’s face it, we’re rather self-centered when it comes to planning how our next negotiation is going to turn out. As I’m pretty sure that we are all well aware of by now, thinking only of ourselves when it comes to negotiating can lead to some long and trying negotiations.
What if there was a better way? It turns out that it is and it has a name: logrolling.
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In the world of negotiating, despite all of the different principled negotiation styles and negotiating techniques that get used, there are a number of tactics that have achieve classic status.
One such technique is called the “good cop / bad cop” approach. You’ll encounter this when you sit down to negotiate and one member of the other side says that they really want to be able to reach an agreement with you and at the same time another member of the other side decides to present you with an outrageous, even insulting, offer. A member of the other side urges them to make a concession. This makes that member of the other side seem like a trusted friend. You find yourself taking his advice and working hard to bridge your gap with person who made the insulting offer, even proposing concessions you never intended to make.
Guess what – you just fell for the good cop / bad cop tactic.
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Negotiating is hard.
Negotiating when you are a woman is even harder. Historically women have not been as aggressive as men. They have been willing to settle for what is offered to them. However, to truly be successful negotiators women need to start to think about what a man would be able to achieve in their position.
What women need to start to do in negotiations is to start to employ more assertive behavior.
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Negotiators are always looking for ways that they can get more value out of their next negotiation.
Although there may be many different ways to accomplish this such as using different negotiation styles and negotiating techniques, one way that we tend to overlook too often is by negotiating a right of first refusal. Just in case anyone doesn’t remember what the right of first refusal is, also known as a matching right or right of first offer, it is defined as being a guarantee that one side to a business deal can match any offer that the other side later receives for what is being negotiated.
As negotiators we need to realize that the rights of first refusal could be a win-win tool that can enhance your negotiation skills, but to ensure that it is mutually beneficial, it needs to be negotiated with care.
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As negotiators, there are a few books that I’m guessing that we have all pretty much read.
One of the classic negotiating books that everyone should have on their shelves is “Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In”. In this book, the authors explained that negotiators don’t have to choose between either waging a strictly competitive, win-lose negotiation battle or caving in to avoid conflict. What they said was that negotiators can and should look for negotiation strategies that can help both sides get more of what they want. If we take the time to listen closely to each other, treat each other fairly, and explore options to increase value, we can find ways of getting to yes that reduce the need to rely on hard-bargaining tactics and unnecessary concessions. Great idea.
Now exactly how can we go about making this happen?
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In the world of negotiating there are number of classic questions that we all deal with each time we start a negotiation.
One of the biggest is whether or not we should be the ones who make the first offer. The answer to this question is generally “yes” – lots of research has gone into what is called “anchoring bias” and it tells us that no matter what negotiation styles and negotiating techniques are being used, we should be the ones who move first. What is anchoring in negotiation you ask?
In a negotiation centered on either price or another issue, the party who moves first typically benefits by “anchoring” the discussion that follows on their offer—even if the anchor is arbitrary.
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Let’s face it – you can’t negotiate without having some emotions come into play.
We all tend to get upset, excited, depressed, and elated at different times during a negotiation because of the negotiation styles and negotiating techniques that are involved. Without a lot of surprise it turns out that the people who study such things are learning about the connections among emotions, negotiators, and decision making.
Since such emotions can influence the results of our negotiations, it sure seems as though we should take some time and understand how our emotions can influence our outcomes.
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