From "Man Up" to Showing Up: Former Pro Athlete on Healing, Emotional Safety & Real Connection
Description
If you've ever been praised at work and lost at home, you're not alone. My good friend and guest on today's episode is Paul Coleman, who thought "providing" was enough for his family… until conflicts, distance, and a daughter's simple note exposed the truth: true connection with loved ones was a skill and he was lacking in it.
Paul is a former professional athlete and top 1% California real estate agent, husband, and father to four. Over two years, he has rebuilt his inner world - finally facing childhood wounds he swore he had dealt with already, learning emotional safety for himself and how to create that for others, and choosing presence over performance. In this episode, he shares the exact steps that changed how he shows up for his family differently, because what he believed was "showing up" wasn't working.
You'll Hear
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Why "man up" works- until it absolutely doesn't
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The household red flags that launched his healing journey
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The book that unlocked his reactivity as a father and partner ("Parenting from the Inside Out")
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How reframing his origin story (and writing to his estranged father) melted decades of anger
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Emotional safety 101: presence, regulation, and not mirroring your partner's mood
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The 6-year-old's note that reoriented his entire approach to love
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How to stop fixing and start holding (and why it changes everything)
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Building brotherhood: why men's groups accelerate growth
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Practical boundaries when hormones, stress, and history collide
Walk away with a clear picture of what emotional safety looks like in practice from a man's perspective, how to become the grounded "rock" your partner and kids can lean on, and why presence… NOT performance creates lasting connection.
And men listening - if you're feeling called out (in the best way) - Learn more and Apply for my men's coaching program: Healthy Men-tality
Connect with Tara:
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- Submit a question for an upcoming Podcast or LIVE
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Disclaimer: The content shared in this podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and should not be considered professional medical, mental health, or legal advice. I am not a licensed mental health professional or medical provider and cannot diagnose, treat, or prescribe medication for any condition.
If you or someone you know is struggling, please ask for support from a licensed professional or contact a trusted organization in your area. In cases of crisis or emergency, please contact local authorities or a crisis hotline immediately.
The views expressed in this podcast are my personal opinions and those of my guests. They are not intended to replace professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Thank you for listening responsibly.





