When Holding It All Together Is Pulling You Apart: Overfunctioning & Relationship Burnout
Description
If you’re the one constantly managing emotions, plans, or repair in your relationship, this episode is for you. You may not call it by name, but what you’re experiencing is relationship burnout—the quiet exhaustion that comes from overfunctioning and carrying more than your share of the emotional load.
Dr. Rachel Orleck breaks down what really drives overfunctioning in relationships and why it’s not a character flaw—it’s a nervous system survival strategy. You’ll learn how your body equates doing more with staying safe, why you keep trying to fix or manage everything, and how to start stepping out of that exhausting cycle without guilt or withdrawal.
💡 You’ll hear:
- What overfunctioning actually means (and how it shows up in everyday relationship dynamics)
- The difference between caring and controlling when you’re trying to keep the peace
- How emotional labor leads to resentment and disconnection over time
- A simple two-step pause practice to help you stop overexplaining and start balancing your energy
- Why setting micro-boundaries can create more connection—not conflict
This episode will help you understand why you feel so responsible for keeping everything calm, and why letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care—it means you’re finally trusting your relationship to hold both of you.
Key Takeaway
Overfunctioning in relationships isn’t proof that you’re controlling—it’s proof that your body once had to keep everyone safe. Learning to pause, regulate, and rebalance is how you start healing relationship burnout from the inside out.
Free Resources:
Break the Cycle: 7 days to break the conflict cycle (Email Course)




