In order to strengthen your resilience in the face of (in front of) hopelessness and despair, there are a number of important and practical things you can do, which is what we’ll find out in the next chapter.

Key idea 6

Hope is a skill, not an emotion.

To combat(fight) hopelessness and despair, let’s start with hope. We think of hope as being a warm and fuzzy emotion. But that’s actually not true. In fact, being hopeful is a skill that you can learn. Being hopeful comes from being able to set realistic goals, figure out how to meet the goals and believe in your own abilities. Hope comes from encountering adversity(difficulty), and discovering that you can be resilient(able to recover) in the face of it. To learn hopefulness, you need to practice setting goals that you can actually meet.

Even more important, you need to become comfortable with failure and be prepared to try new approaches if the first one doesn’t work. The best thing about learning to be hopeful is that it’s infectious(if a feeling is infectious, it spreads to other people.). For example, researchers have shown that hopeful parents generally have hopeful children.

Apart from practicing your hopeful skills, you can also practice increasing your resilience by working with what researcher Martin Seligman calls “the 3 Ps”: personalization, permanence(remain the same for a long time), and pervasiveness(quality of being spread out). In the last chapter, we were talking about how despair feels all-encompassing(overwhelming) and permanent. People in that state often take it very personally, beating themselves up for failing or letting down(disappointing) their families. 

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📚هایلایت قسمت دهم خلاصه کتاب 

Atlas of the heart

🍁resilience : تاب آوری

🍁in the face of: در مواجهه با

🍁hopelessness : نا امیدی

🍁despair : یاس

🍁emotion : حس

🍁combat : مبارزه کردن

🍁fuzzy : نرم

🍁realistic goals : اهداف واقعگرایانه

🍁figure out : فهمیدن

🍁encountering : مواجه شدن

🍁adversity : سختی

🍁discovering : فهمیدن

🍁comfortable : راحت

🍁failure : شکست

🍁prepared : آماده

🍁approaches : روش ها

🍁infectious : واگیردار

🍁personalization : شخصی سازی

🍁permanence : دوام

🍁pervasiveness : شیوع

🍁spread out: گسترش پیدا کردن

🍁all-encompassing : فراگیر

🍁overwhelming : فراگیر

🍁permanent : دائم

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💛مرسی که به دوستانتون معرفی میکنین💛