Chapter 5

Decisions about family and children are serious and need to be discussed extensively(in great detail).

One topic that can be a real deal-breaker(a factor that is significant enough to cause someone to reject

something) for a couple is whether or not to have children. This can also be a bank-breaker(extremely

expensive). Raising a child to age 18 in the United States costs on average $233,610.

But the potential problems of raising a child don’t stop there. John Gottman, one of the authors,

observed a 67 percent drop in marital happiness in couples who had a child within four years of getting

married. And this marital happiness doesn’t come back until after the child has left the nest (left home)–

if the parents haven’t already divorced by this point. So, what sort of recommendations(suggestions) can

prospective(likely to happen in the future) or current parents follow if they want to avoid this?

Firstly, regardless of (without considering, without taking into account ) your gender or whether you’re in a

hetero or same-sex relationship, both partners need to involve themselves in the pregnancy and birth of

the child. Studies of heterosexual relationships show that when the father is involved in the pregnancy,

there is less of a chance of conflict and more chances for continued marital happiness.

Secondly, parents need to prioritize(organize according to importance) their intimacy with each other. This

involves making sure you connect regularly, whether through date nights or simply continued

communication. Raising children is stressful, and you need to communicate and avoid withdrawing from

each other(distancing emotionally or physically from another person). With this in mind, it’s time to plan out

your next date night. This one will be all about family and children and should take place somewhere

frequented(regularly visited) by children. Consider a public playground or a family-friendly restaurant.

The questions you and your partner should ask each other on this date are probably quite obvious(clear).

The elephant in the room(something that everyone is aware of but no one wants to address or talk about

openly) is, of course, your idea of the perfect family. Does it include children? If so, how many? What sort

of problems might you encounter(face) while raising children? How can you prevent or tackle(solve)

those problems?

If you’ve already decided you don’t want children, that doesn’t mean you should skip this date

completely. Family involves more than just children, after all. In this case, you might consider asking

about your partner’s closest family. What can you do to strengthen (make something stronger) your

relationship with this family? Keep in mind this might be relatives or friends.

📚هایلایت قسمت 6 خلاصه کتاب Eight dates 📚

✅decision : تصمیم

✅extensively: با جزییات زیاد

✅deal-breaker: بهم زننده

✅significant : مهم

✅enough : کافی

✅bank-breaker: هزینه بر

✅extremely : به شدت

✅expensive : گران

✅potential : احتمالی

✅author : نویسنده

✅observe : مشاهده کردن

✅Leave the nest : ترک‌کردن خانه

✅divorce: طلاق

✅recommendations : توصیه ها

✅suggestions : پیشنهادات

✅prospective : آینده

✅current : فعلی

✅firstly : اولا

✅regardless of: صرفنظر از

✅gender: جنسیت

✅same-sex relationship : روابط همجنس

✅involve: مستلزم بودن

✅pregnancy : حاملگی

✅heterosexual : دگرجنس گرا

✅conflict : تعارض

✅continue : ادامه دادن

✅prioritize : اولیت بندی کردن

✅intimacy : نزدیکی

✅regularly : بطور منظم

✅communication : ارتباط

✅stressful : استرس آور

✅withdrawing: فاصله گرفتن

✅frequent(v): زیاد رفت و آمد کردن

✅obvious : واضح

✅elephant in the room : مسئله ای که نادیده گرفته میشه

✅encounter : روبرو شدن

✅tackle : حل کردن

✅strengthen: قوی کردن

➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖

🌟اگر واستون مفید یا جالب بود لطفا به دوستاتونم معرفی کنید❣️

🌟https://t.me/luminous_bookclub

🌟Instagram page: luminous__english

🌟Castbox channel: luminous english

🌟 YouTube channel: luminous_english

♥️ Music Channel: @luminous_music